Honestly the greatest trick us white people ever pulled was mixing shit with a ton of mayonnaise and calling it 'salad'

Sometimes I regret getting leg tattoos because now there’s no way in hell I can post a hot dogs or legs pic. It will be so obviously legs 😞😞😞

You can only be so good at eating box when you’re simultaneously being railed from behind. Yet 85% of the time it’s precisely how I first interact with a new duo partner and I just need to say 👏 I 👏 AM 👏 BETTER 👏 THAN 👏 THIS👏!!!! Anyway happy Valentine’s Day! 💗🌶️💘💌🎀🎁🩸🧨🍓🍫🍷

Allow me to introduce you to the most pick-me ass photo I’ve ever seen. Let’s discuss.

I want to tour new cities in the next few months...but where?

I'm trying to divest from ALL social media platforms to have access to my followers whether I'm deleted, the company gets purchased by a fascist, or who tf knows at this point! Oddly enough what inspired me was listening to @chrisgethard.bsky.social talk to @jessedavidfox.bsky.social on Good One.

Despite my pouty exterior it was a really lovely birthday. Friend just sent these off their digital camera 💗👑

I made a “dress” of roughly 40 pieces of lingerie & underwear because apparently to get views on Instagram you have to be fully dressed but I’m acutely aware everyone is there to catch me in my skivvies! Is this what we call a compromise? Tim Gunn you clocking this?

I have come to the internet in search of other hot girls that are currently playing Pathologic 3. Please! I cannot only get my rocks off chatting with surly dudes at the DIY show this weekend about it. I need titties AND theater of the absurd apocalyptic gamer chit chat 😩

Officially fully discouraged by Instagram and therefore back in the grips of a new platform. God help me 🤡

Please more 5-star hotel stays, champagne breakfasts, and dance parties for 2025.

I sincerely need to know how you all have the time to make a living, live a life, have hobbies, and post on social media. Please tell me your secret. I truly cannot muster the willpower!!!!