𝘈𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘰𝘪𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘦𝘭𝘥𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩, 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘯 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶

I need someone to take my dogs through one of these courses so I can live vicariously through them and not, instead, try to do it myself and win the “most fibromyalgia to ever flare up in one person” award.

“Fun money” going to my dogs this paycheck because A) I’m too strung thin schedule-wise to complete enough comms for another opening, and B) obsessing over my dogs is “Fun” for me anyway.

I’m only interested in seeing the movie if Predator and Elle Fanning make out.

Have you considered an anti tampering device?

Making one of my late aunt’s desserts and you KNOW homegirl found this out the hard way

Warm up i really liked the pose of so ych ! One-off $165 + $5 shipping (if desired) Dm to claim !

One side of my brain wants to CREATE and DRAW but the other side wants to CRASH OUT and TEXT ALL MY FRIENDS ASKING IF THEY REALLY LIKE ME OR FAKE IT

Daredevil

A 34-year-old as a politician: My god he's like a baby. It's like they just elected an infant to be their mayor. A 34-year-old as an athlete: You have to admire the bravery of him attempting that dunk, knowing full well the grim reaper is right behind him.

Waging war at the staff fridge

You have to survive. There are graves to piss on that haven't been dug yet.

Targeted Instagram ads while I’m on layover in Denver: Hydroflask Hydroflask Camping gear Mossy Oak Hydroflask Gun

Me: I will NOT buy an airport gift shop sweatshirt on clearance. I do NOT need it. Me boarding my plane:

Old lady next to me is irately monologuing to a dude about The Transgenderism and if I had a social bone left in my body to square up… 😪

Our perfect little boy needs help. Please share if you can 💔 Help save a black cat on Halloween of all nights. gofund.me/6cbadeb54

You should get a letter grade after going through TSA and a sticker or a snack if your grade is A.

I draw you into a shrimpy fetal creature endearingly

Me putting on @tinydinosaurs.bsky.social ‘s eyeliner

HOT WIDOWS IN MY AREA cw: spiders

You can’t even use SNAP to buy a hot rotisserie chicken unless you live in a state with a special waiver.

I didn’t know my mom works for the TSA

Being cinematographically cultured has its costs. #thelionking #tlk #thelionking2simbaspride #disney #finaldestination

Airplane land like duck land on water

I like flying Southwest because even though I have the Least Money, I can still get a window seat if I am pure of heart.

I keep forgetting it’s literally Halloween and then Abraham Lincoln walks by the airport terminal gate.

There’s a lady walking back and forth at the terminal with a Definitely Not Service Dog which is making me picture if I would ever bring one of my dogs on a trip, and Banjo Screams his Feelings so much that there would be no peace for anyone.

Jumping out of my seat and running for the cockpit while landing so I can beat the flight attendant to being the “FIRST to welcome you to Denver.”

Dude wearing flannel with mullet and banjo on this connecting flight to Denver. This man is returning HOME.

flowering familiars

Sorry this site has been my therapist lately!! My brain is broken and that shit’s expensive.

I’m starting to think I got too bold about defeating my social anxiety, so my anxiety disorder decided to manifest it in Extreme Introversion just to get back at me.

Me when my sims need more light in their house but I’m burnt out on the homebuilding part of the game

IYKYK Thank you @wryote.bsky.social, this is going on my bumper first thing in the morning!

*literally just in a hoodie, jeans, and carhartt boots* Guy at gas station: I like your outfit. You look like an adventurer.

Me when the city fall brush pickup comes and picks up my brush

I am going to assume the saves on this message are the HR department

Paradise City was on the radio at work and I sang the “take me down to the furry con city where the grass is green and the lizards have titties” one and a customer was like

I have an unhealthy relationship with Death, to the point even a friend’s family member I have never met passing sends me into a night-ending spiral. Should’ve seen this coming; when I was a toddler I would NEED to say “see you tomorrow” to both parents at bedtime or I would fall asleep crying 🥴

ISOPOD PARTY MY HOUSE

Beautiful singles named Insurance Open Enrollment are blowing up my phone

Falling asleep to Benadryl and Enya’s Boadicea can’t recommend it enough

November usually starts a two month long “holy shit there is so much going on in my life that I can’t stop thinking and moving and working for one moment,” and that shit is EARLY this year. 😤

Fun Furry Fact: the first ever furry convention, "Confurence 0" was held in 1989 in southern California. The same year which saw the release of unrelated belgian techno anthem "Pump Up the Jam"

It never ceases to amaze me how ready and willing people are to be just nasty snippy sewer goblins to others when they can hide behind the screen of a phone or computer. The world is so full of NEGATIVE and lashing out sideways isn’t ever going to help, Internet Karen.

New devastating nickname just dropped.