sick before birthday celebrations should i jump out this window

they should invent a pill that makes you feel good

im gooning for two

after many months and a move, she finally works 🙂‍↕️

ex situationship reposted ex’s story (he needs someone to take over his lease) and i had no idea they knew eachother like that

on my way to embarrass myself at drop in volleyball with my bum ankle

ijbol they didnt give a fuck back then huh

stayed in and played cribbage with bf yesterday

rewatched sinners, that end credit scene pisses me off so bad

she is so halloween coded

horrible chronic shoulder pain has gotten me down so much these last few weeks/months but still i persist

whats her name…..whats she like…..

wore a cowboy costume to work today and first thing a coworker says to me is “brokeback mountain, love it!”

my pussy has that new car smell

abolish sports questions during trivia!!

cant stop saying goated

get off the tina!!

now sissy that clock

microdosing hell by going into the office once a week

I need a bruh pill

night of a 1000 ruth bader ginsburgs

and if i say pinkpantheress is the voice of our generation

as a big Legends Arceus fan, I missed having the shit beat out of me by alpha pokemon

Excusez-moi est-ce que vous savez où est un bon restaurant Parisien?

white straight bestie asking me what “trade” means, we need to start gatekeeping again!!!

unfortunately AWS outage not affecting my work

traitors celebrity uk spoilers but them voting out 2/3 of the black people first is so 😭

after 3 hours of tutorials I can confirm PLZA is fun

bf tried to play taylor swift on the TV for his friends (my spotify account) and I forgot I had her blocked so it was just playing her random collabs 😭

vers switch bisexual bilingual ambidextrous agnostic

The twink is present

was about to put in a noise complaint for my upstairs neighbor but decided to give them grace and i haven’t from them since

feeling immense pressure to create the perfect Halloween playlist that is long enough, plays all the hits, and will satisfy the gays and the straights

new member of the family

what is the complexity of a non-binary search

Elton John farted on my shit tf

making cinnamon buns for the first time, its going a bit like this

posting mixtape cover here first bc oomfship is forever

missing twin peaks season 1 marathon hosted by Joan Chen because of friend’s birthday

catching up on #tar38 and every time Joseph pops up on screen….

you bitches be slow asf, anna farris

when i play middle back in volleyball: im libing out

Unity security vulnerability update fucking up my whole week

bottoms be like im so wet: