#hegseth #fatnixon

Fire sale in progress. Schadenfreude activated. #BoycottDisney #BoycottHulu

Today's juxtaposition

DO IT.

"Used" how, exactly?

Stable. Genius. Epstein files.

I was going to say something like "I wish we all could be as happy as Squirt® Girl," but then I noticed her smile doesn't quite reach her eyes, which are telling me she's she's picturing someone burn to death.

Better kerning could have prevented a rather embarrassing situation

Funyunderpants™

Won't you help Sal get some penis wigs?

Of all the animatronic heads you could have fixed to the top of your spanking new sexbot, THAT'S what you chose, Bezos? #butterface

This is not a surrealist joke.

Stable Genius. #fucktrump #amendment25

Dear Elon, Lots of guys' rockets explode before the test. A sex therapist might be able to help.

Good. Came to the right place.

Dear leader Lord Nixon of Fat took a lil' nappy nap amid his eensy-weensy, sparsely attended, $45 million goose-step parade. #nokings #fucktrump

#nokings #obamaappreciationday

Well...? Recipe???

It's been a Tuesday.

Wow. Bossie really hit the skids.

It's the weekend, hosers.

It's TACO Tuesday!

"nobody not even the rain has such small hands" - e.e. cummings

Put on your Sunday clothes Cannes is over and A-listers are done clapping for each other in French. So from the front, Halle Berry serves Beetlejuice's drapes. From the back, there's a knapsack stuffed with an emergency back-up tutu. Oh, Halle. That is not your dress and petticoats are not capes.