Gavin Newsom responds to whatever the heck that Pete Hegseth speech was

Drunk Pete is going to Red-Wedding ALL of them and make admirals and generals out of a bunch of incompetent roided-up gym bros whose main military experience has been racking up high scores in Warfighter 2. You read it here first.

War-Ravaged Portland is now the name of my Decemberists cover band.

DINOSAUR: Why does Harker go to Castle Dracula? ME: Because Dracula invited him. DINOSAUR: But why does he GO? ME: He doesn't know Dracula is a vampire. DINOSAUR: But his name is Dracula!

They are SO incompetent! (How incompetent ARE they?) SO incompetent that they wrote "Anti-ICE". Not "Fuck ICE" or "ICE = Nazis" or even "Kill Whitey"...but "Anti ICE" See also: the 19th century Ken Burns drivel presented to us as "correspondence between Tyler Robinson and his trans antifa lover".

*SQUAWK* Polly wanna cracker! Allo! Allo! You're a birdbrain! *SQUAWK* (Listens to earpiece) What's that? Oh....oops. (clears throat) Arr! Hand over yer treasure, or I'll sliver yer gizzard! Arr!

When it finally happens, it will be natural causes, but they're gonna secretly take his corpse to a big blue state city and make it look like a Liberal trans immigrant BLM activist on fentanyl killed him. You heard it here first.

My Beast Mode has downgraded to Varmint Mode.

GETTING OFF ON TECHNICALITIES: Why fines are unjust. Where the poor see a WARNING in the criminal code, the rich see an ADVERTISEMENT. "Don't do it--a $2000 fine!" vs. "And for just $2000 a go, you can do this!"

What is happening in the churches that is radicalizing young white men against America this way?

Yuh know what I hate about them libtard socialist illegal ivory tower elite homeless pronoun fenatanyl grooming drag queen DEI BLM critical race shrill feminazi cat lady fuckstick idiot gay cuck femboi vegan coastal urban jungle miscegenating hippie freaks? It's that they're always calling us NAMES!

....and it turns out he fits the typical shooter profile almost perfectly. White dude, 22, Trump supporter, Republican family steeped in gun culture, father is both a minister AND law enforcement. All we need now is the disclosure of his history of violence against women.

Which inspires more LOLSOB? 1). Liberals in 2025 saying they're concerned that America might descend into violence; or 2). Conservatives in 2025 shouting "That's it! No more Mr. Nice Guy!"

Men are weird: Half the dudes on my social media feed = "He must have been ex special forces to execute a kill shot from 200 yards and get clean away" and the other half = "I could have done it easy" I know what I know of this from cop shows on TV.

THEM: I am stunned and shaken by the assassination of Charlie Kirk. He had a right to his views and from everything I've seen, he engaged in civil debate with people with whom he disagreed. ME: So you like Nazis, now? Did you also mourn when Osama Bin Laden was killed? THEM: Omg UNFOLLOWED!!!!

Osama Bin Laden is dead.

UNPOPULAR OPINION: Charlie Kirk has faked his death and assumed a new identity because he's on the Epstein list and knew he was about to go down. HOAX! HOAX! FAKE NEWS!

SO, THIS HAPPENED: www.youtube.com/shorts/ZMvLA...

...and so to bed.

He could do the funniest thing, and fuck off on the 11th of the month. For decades, people would = "Where were you on Good 9/11?"

All the senseis teach self defense, they say the same things every time Show confidence (oh-ay-oh), and you won't be targeted for crime Stride long and firm, keep your head up, look around with a steely eye Keep your back straight, (oh-ay-oh), the muggers around won't even try

A HUMAN BILL OF RIGHTS By Pete Walker 1.You have the right to be treated with respect. 2. You have the right to say no. 3. You have the right to make mistakes. 4. You have the right to reject unsolicited advice or feedback. 5. You have the right to negotiate for change. (1/4)

You walk into a room and see this woman looking you over. What do you do?

Jonathan Nez is a candidate for the Democratic nomination for Arizona's 2nd Congressional District in the 2026 elections. Trumpers want to know if he's here illegally. He's Navajo.

OK, I'll just say it: The Evangelical "church", in particular, is not religious. They are a secular child sex-trafficking syndicate that hates everything Jesus stood for, and that pretends to be religious as a smokescreen to obfuscate their crimes. Fight me.

Yeah, he's not yet dead. Today felt like Homer Simpson discovering he was all out of donuts.

...and so to bed

Wow. It's almost as if August slipped away into a moment in time...

With the stroke of a pen, Trump could force Israel out of Gaza. He just doesn't want to. The Republican Party is complicit in genocide. They are scheming to BULLDOZE Gaza and turn it into a luxury Trump resort for the rich.

Little Eichmanns at the border Little Eichmanns made of icky ICEy Little Eichmanns, Little Eichmanns, at the concentration camps They're abusive, and racist, and Christian Republicans And they're all made out of icky ICEy, and of asholes they're the champs (1 of 2)

UNPOPULAR OPINION: Anyone who decides to attack the one political Party that stands between America and holocaust, is no leftist. World War II was not the time to aggressively demand that America "hold Churchill and the British Empire accountable for their Colonialism".

Apparently, thousands of Swifties posted to the effect "OMG GOOD NEWS!!!", without saying what, and a whole lot of the first comments were "Is he dead?" I was taken aback for a moment there, until I realized they were not asking about Travis.

ISIS, Hamas, Intifada, Taliban, Hezbollah, Tawhid....Al Qaeda.

Who made me the statesman that I am today The greatest, beside whom the others all slouch? Who made me the bigliest, far and away? The greatest that ever got spooge on his couch One man deserves the credit One man deserves the fame Nikolai Carpathia Donaldtrumpski is his name! Aye!

O, the noble Duke of York He had 10,000 men They marched into the tavern And they staggered out again O, a-drinking we all goes! A-wenching we all goes! We'll have some fun, and when we're done We'll catch a right fine dose!

SCARY FOODS DEPARTMENT: The Trump Sandwich. Baloney on white bread with Russian dressing and a small pickle. Hard to swallow.

In 2018, an entire generation was condemned by Boomer society for a crime they did not commit. These young people promptly escaped from the rigid societal stereotypes imposed upon them and escaped to the cultural underground.

Shot through the foot, and you're extreme You give truth a bad meme!

Him: "No way man, used mattresses are disgusting. I don't care how clean it looks, you're gonna sleep on something that someone else has fucked on god knows how many times? Nasty shit yo. Me, never." Me: "I've got some bad news for you about hotel rooms..."

BREAKING: Trump calls on Congress to pass the Fugitive Democrat Act, requiring the governors of free states to cooperate with Texas bounty hunters seeking to recover the escaped property of Red States.

1 of 2: cue Nancy Sinatra.... They've been marchin'---and I think they be Rushin' They've been marchin'--when they should take a hike I can't take no more--so I'm ready to dish out I'm fed up with the American Reich

Pardon me, Are you Julius Caesar? Who's asking? Well, you know--me, sir My name's Brutus, and I'm just peachy, sir I've conquered Gaul--Veni, Vidi, Vici, sir

I fired my lawyer because she told me the cops had DNA evidence, video footage of me committing the crime, and a signed confession, and that we weren't likely to win at trial and should consider a plea deal. She obviously rigged the evidence to make me look guilty.

Enjoying the salt air and the rust on my door. How about you?

WHERE IS THE GREEN PARTY??? Why aren't they stopping the Republicans? Fucking useless...

Imagine if people just believed women and girls? Anyone wanna bet Sheriff Grady Judd rapes girls too? He fits the profile. www.motherjones.com/criminal-jus...

People will be upset. People will pretend not to believe it. But no one will be surprised. www.closertotheedge.net/p/the-affida...

Pepperoni goan' be soooooo mad...