Bro are these your French moleskin booty shorts

Hello you little rats [warmly]

Nothing activates primate panic mode in me quite like a scurrying house centipede. I know they’re net good but it’s still on sight

Clemency would be a beautiful name for a girl

I don’t know what’s worse, England advancing or Mexico being out. Just kidding, it’s definitely England advancing

A wise man said “I like your Fourth of July special edition seltzers, but I don’t like your Fourth of July”

That unsettling moment when you perceive someone doesn’t possess “money isn’t real” mindset

Can’t shake the thought of a protagonist named Skillet Reprieve

What do yall know about 陈皮铱生 Dried aged tangerine peel peanuts

You should be able to get married at the post office

Not looking stupid is one of man’s noblest pursuits

Looking at one of God’s beautiful creatures and asking “what is bro doing”

You won’t need office supplies where you’re going

Bystander U: Watch the World Go by with Us

Imagine a lizard with human skin

Imagine beaker but he’s calm, cool, and collected

There are exclusive varieties of peanut butter not available to the public

Advertise your Bluesky account with a Simpsons image

This is you bro

Do yall fuck with ambient music? [now yelling into mic] I SAID do yall FUCK with AMBIENT MUSIC

The old me: not want rats in the building Me now: WANT rats in the building

Figured it was time to set up the ac again. June 9, that’s a pretty good run imo

ELVERA'S GACHO SHOP; 30 Sittee St, Belize City, Belize https://www.google.com/maps/search/?api=1&query=17.4994929%2C-88.1965026&query_place_id=ChIJrY3XCdlZXI8R3crc2HRUUMg

Putting a roof on a building is the hottest trend of the summer. The kids want nothing more than to be “up and roofing” right now

The ecstasy of post, the agony of email

Graham platner has redneck face. Didn’t know they made em like that up in Maine

Is tonsure a humility thing cuz it makes you look dumb as fuck

Click Here to Meet Faceblind Women in Your Area

Lana del Rey means “the king’s wool”

This appears to be a real product if anybody is interested in the carapace look

Rapid rise to power, anyone?

I have a confession. I don’t take the towel off the rack to dry myself after bathing, I just kinda contort my body to dry myself off without removing it. I’ve pulled one of the wall a few times but I remain undeterred. Just how I do things

I suddenly understand the concept of “Chungus life” with great clarity

Single image. Take note, other restaurants

Hitting an aircraft with an rpg has to be an all time feeling. Likely 100s of times better than sex

Never use reminders and I’m learning how unforgiving it is

Id love to be poured into a thermal carafe

Sat down on the can to pee and text, but in such a way that both feet are now asleep and I can’t get up

In 3 or 4 appointments I think I managed to earn the trust and affection of my psychiatrist. Unfortunately just not in sufficient quantities for her to prescribe me benzos

Who else up watching every video on the American paddlefish wiki

Can they do this? Goose experts chime in

Reasonably confident this was it

Making money moves (we’re spending it)

I know it’s just a lost in translation but being a running dog sounds kinda fun

Isn’t that your prime minister bro. Bro

If you guys don’t tell me I’m the one most aligned with the dao here I’m going to freak the fuck out

We have been made blind to the beauty of the word disambiguation by Wikipedia

Woke up with familiar Sunday feelings; hunger for biscuits and spite for god