It's high time to get rid of Email sign-offs. If you are writing the following, my immediate thought is as follows: Sincerely: Person needs to be more honest with themselves and get an enema. Warm Regards: Ewwww, you moist or something? Best: Fix your bowtie, freak Cheers: Psycho

I am going to take a bow wearing an impeccably stitched Jil Sander suit and laurels, as I virtually walk among the late comers to the "Jake Tapper is a hack" realization. I told you this when he was pitching his book on Afghanistan while reporting on Afghanistan. The guy is an absolute muppet!

I wonder if it is possible to shift dimensional timelines where all my friends/family can join the universe where Hillary won & all the dypshytes and Maga dolts can stay in this one. Then we check back in a decade & see how far the worlds have come in terms of technology and progress and compare.

"Happy Holidays!" (Fires the first salvo in the 2025 War on Christmas!) 🥷😎

Kimmel and Colbert Podcast Hour. LFG!

Okay, as someone who watched all 7 seasons of Vikings, I can say with certitude that Kirk's body needs to be put in a canoe with 3 goats, atop kindling doused in whale oil and set out into the fjord and have his wife shoot a fire arrow to set the canoe ablaze. Basic tablestakes to get to Valhalla! 🫡

There are christians who are not racists. MAGA Christians can fuk all the way off.

The other thing I notice is that there are no true intellectuals in MAGA or the right in general. There aren't any Buckley types. Just mediocre dudes dipped in mayonnaise.

Racism in America is wild because racists will go to outlandish lengths to defend and cannonize a 31 yr old middling intellect podcaster who debated kids because he also said racist stuff.

So the guy who killed Charlie Kirk was raised in a Republican household, immersed in gun culture like Charlie Kirk, & dropped out of college after one semester like Charlie Kirk. So naturally, it is the indoctrination of that one fateful semester at college and not 18 years of conservative values. 🙃

only in America, folks want to cannonize the killing of a college dropout, nepo baby, social media influencer, podcaster who debated teenagers surrounded by his sycophantic followers while he spewed racist, misogynistic hate against marginalized group for clout and shitty merchandize sales.

Rush Limbaugh and Satan are definitely not looking forward to debating Charlie Kirk at dinner tonight. sucks to be them!

Did Charlie Kirkkk owe money to the Russians or the Israelis? because that's a professional hit. 🤔

Just a gentle fortnightly reminder that Merrick Garland was an abject failure as the AG. One of the greatest failures of Biden admin choices in appointees. A fucking mouse when America needed a lion in the face of rising fascism.

Framing the messaging: "The head Idiot-in-Charge & his merry band of incompetent grifters have crashed the job market, alienated allies & forged alliances between our enemies. All in the span of 7 months. Also, where are Epstein files?" Every Dem should be on airways with this today and everyday.

Hey guys, do we know if Rudi Giuliani has finished shaving in the La Guardia bathroom sink yet?

It is obvious that JD Vance is the fascist behind the clown doing the white supremacy BS.

Enough of the purity tests. Goal is to win.

Throwing a sandwich at this Meal Team 6 abomination would be an act of kindness.

🚨 Dear Dems, dont get distracted. Trump will throw stupid things in the public sphere. Foccus on two things: A. Trump's idiotic economic agenda and the Bug Ugly Bill B. Epstein Turn every conversation about everything rise into these two points.

The easiest question a Journalist can ask Trump is, "Why did Pam Bondi assign 1000 agents to identify and redact your name from the Epstein files when looking for Pedophiles?

A Reagan lover walks into a bar in 2025 in NYC, the bartender says," Take your Laffer curve and GTFO bish!"

Watching Joe Matthews literally fellate Stephen Mirran on @bloomberg.com is fascinating to watch. What a hack! Kailey Leinz should run the show.

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽you can finally call yourself a New Yorker! 🌟

Bruh, Roy Cooper got to chill with the money grubbing emails.

This is a semi-annual reminder that Glen Rice banged Sarah Palin, and we never really discussed it at length.

When you and your cousins casually hang with Malcolm Gladwell on the 4 train back from Yankee Stadium. Outlier, sure, but the ride goes fast in a Blink of an eye.

May you (Dem Pols) find the intestinal fortitude to fight fascism with the utmost derision it deserves. 🌟🌟

"Obama is not American" became their battlecry for elections for years. Well, the opportunity is here Dems. For once, you all can run on the "Release all Epstein files" platform. None of you are in them. Guess who is? Once in, you can then fix the mess created. But focus on winning.

I would love to see all the dem pols and media right now start calling congressional vacation as the "Epstein Recess." Go back to your districts, hold town halls, invite media and be loud. Or quit!

Why would Trump then AG Bill Barr visit Epstein in the prison the day before he committed "suicide." Do attorney generals typically go and visit convicted felons? Why can't a journalist ask this simple question or investigate? Also fuk Merrick Garland.

🚨Breaking🚨: I will be having a proper filet tonight with himachi crudo and escargo for appetizer. It's time!

It's not so weird that the pedophile party won't release the Trumpstein files.

Any real journalists out there? "How is the Espstein issue a Democratic party hoax when he was arrested, convicted & died during your admin. Maxwell is serving a sex trafficking sentence under your admin. Pam bondi handed out a binder to right-wing influencers at the WH. How is it a Democrat hoax?

I really hope this young lady wins the primary. The democratic party needs young voices that connect with their contemporaries. Let these young people be the youthful, shiny, fiery asteroid that takes down the establishment dinosaurs.

Always be wary of people who dont drink and/or dislike Indian food. Something is wrong with them.

When I first saw this in the Bayeaux Chapel, it was almost as if the Battle of hastings came to life. probably one of the most seminal pieces of art history shaping Europe!

Ah yes, Chris Cilliza, if dog shit stuffed into hotdog skin was a person. P.s. also a very punchable face.

What we all start buying ICE gear and start asking ICE losers for their papers. How would police know?

Did Jake Tapper get deported? Cuz that mfker is nowhere to be seen on this demented dypshyte! 🙄

The guy who went to "Harvard Extension School" 😀😀😀

The Trump Whitehouse UFC main card should be Elmo and Him fighting to the death. PPV that shyte!

@bloomberg.com @opinion.bloomberg.com has Grover Norquist on, and I shit you not, he just quoted Kevin Hasset as the basis for growth in this shitty bill. In the last 40 yrs, same policies from Republicans have delivered lower growth and bigger deficits.

Corporate media ennumerating Trump's wins while American lose is a fascinatingly odious thing to watch. No nuance, no analysis of info in terms of truth or lies. Just bullshit all day long. Also has a very punchable face! 🤔

Why isn't the media and democrats all over this when framing the opposition to the One Big Shitty Bill? 🤔 I would blow this up on huge billboards across the narional highway system with a caption, "so much winning!"

The cease fire is because Israel ran out of THAAD batteries. They will start shyte again.

It's so hot in NYC today that I saw two subway rats dry humping a Mr. Softee truck.

1. Iran moved the enriched uranium and centrifuges out like months ago. 2. US Bombed for show. 3. Israel/Iran took body blows 4. Iran told the US, Qataris exactly what they were gonna do. 5. Now asymmetric war begins. (Again) 6. Iran will end up with a bomb anyway. 7. No regime change

I would love to see the Dodgers and sports teams join the fight against fascism. Fukkin Maga will be left with Marlins, Jazz, and Cowboys. LFG!