I just made a carrot cake so rich that Bernie Sanders wants to tax it!

Joaquin Phoenix Joker mashup with Ronald McDonald!

I'll never admit in public what I dared my mom to do while she had her hands out like that, but I will say that my mom said, "Okay, for $200 I'll do it!"

I think I'll vacation at the beach later this year.

And the sign said, "The words of the prophets Are written on the subway walls And tenement halls"

I swear this guy looks like the love interest in every Hallmark film.

Every now and then YouTube suggests a bunch of clips from mob movies to me. "Janice kills Richie" and so on. Are mob movies just slasher films for Italians?

I finally get to installing the bidet and not only does the adapter leak but I hate the seat.

Man, Trump is uglier than OJ's divorce!

Stupid dreams. Stupid having to hastily clean up a big spill. Stupid dream furniture containing liquid that spills. Stupid dreams.

TONIGHT! WOMAN! WE'LL BE GOING DOWN SEPULVEDA! WITH THE T-TOP DOWN! Glam Band bringing the big sound to downtown Las Vegas!

This is from a German citizen.

It was cool meeting Little T out in Vegas!

Remember when Bill Clinton was the sitting president and was grilled over a blow job he got from another adult? Remember how Republicans said it was super important that Clinton lied about it? Remember how it was all that mattered? I do. Republicans set that bar. Let's see them limbo under it.

Ever try something and it worked better than you expected? Happened to me. Learned something today.

Had a wonderful conversation with a fellow Deadhead at a gambling supply store here in Vegas. She sold me her last pack of Grateful Dead playing cards and gave me a custom Dead casino chip. Thank you Edith!

Since everyone else is sharing their thoughts on Star Wars, I figure I can do it too. The sequel trilogy is awful and here's why: youtu.be/p3Yn56a0AcI?...

So long Bob Weir! Gonna miss a world without you in it. But the Weirwolf lives on inside all of us who hear the music.

After the murder in Minneapolis I'm reminded of something Arlo Guthrie said: songs can change the course of nations. So sing a song of protest today, loud and clear.

My son and I at CalArts, room A-113. Just being there was magical!

Some songs cause my adrenaline to soar. Here's one of them: youtu.be/XdhKnAw6VZw?...

@repgaramendi.bsky.social In the name of FSM! HE'S BOMBING VENEZUELA! DO SOMETHING!

Me see "book club" and me get excited! Me never seen club made of book before!

Let me be the 41,981st to wish you a merry Christmas!

Thought I'd share some photos from the various comic book conventions I've been to. These were taken February 10, 2019.

I was inspired to share some of the photos I took at the roller derby.

I was inspired to share some photos I've taken at the roller derby .

Hey SCOTUS! If birthright citizenship isn't actually a thing then who gets to be the arbiter? Think real hard about that, because Trump might decide he can get rid of all of you so you can't get in his way.

OMFSM that's hilarious!

Hey, maybe we're going about this all wrong. Has anyone tried telling Melania about jury nullification? You would get it all, girl! And we would have your back.

With a surprise twist ending, that old Thanksgiving favorite... youtu.be/B_tMzSxvoeA?...

Hey kids! Don't join the military. If they can recall Senator Mark Kelly and court martial him for saying something that's true then imagine what they can do to someone NOT in a position of power. Don't ever give them that kind of leverage.

All these video game movies and nobody has made one about Pong. Shame.

Dear Billie Joel, It's still a great song and I get the message. But polishing the fenders is more difficult than driving when one has a broken back.

@aaronfrizzle.bsky.social I've managed to read the first page so far!

One of the all-time great examples of street art if you ask me!

I'm just going to say it: The East Wing demolition reminded me of the Twin Towers on 9/11.

Kannst du sag "Nuremberg"?

He could've called for unity. He could've said that he hears and understands our concerns. He could've started negotiations to open the government. Instead he posted a video of himself in a crown shitting on the protesters. He is incapable of growth or introspection. He is void of leadership.

Milkshakes are for when you want ice cream but you really want to work for it.

Hey @pelosi.house.gov ! Remember when you talked about keeping the powder dry? Is NOW a good time to finally shoot the cannon? Or did we already miss the opportunity?

I think I'll watch "Dam Busters." I've heard that some of the scenes in A New Hope were inspired by it. Hey! It's got a doggy in it! What a cute doggy! I'll bet he's got a cute name! What a handsome doggy! Oh...oh no...his name is what? No, that can't be right.

Are they just collectively remembering an unsolved murder? Source: PBS share.google/36amdwJTx2MV...

Pyrotechnics at a funeral! He wasn't Steven fucking Tyler!

Crazy afternoon! I'm on my way to a store that's been robbed about 5 times in the last few years and I'm joking with the person with me that there's a chance they'll be robbed while we're there. We pull into the parking lot and there's a police car in front of it. It had just been robbed again!

I'm seeing a lot of preaching and scolding about Kirk being shot, like anyone here pulled the trigger. Or knew the one who did. Why the hell are you on our case? We didn't do anything.

Say, he wasn't in a boat in international waters at the time was he?

Did the coroner follow SOP for neck based trauma and check his blood for drugs that may have contributed to his death? Or did we only do that for George Floyd?

Hey Utah! Have you heard about jury nullification?

I thought Six Flags Magic Mountain would be open year round like Disneyland. V. disappointed right now.