Having one of my episodes during drama club I'm gonna tweak

Normal now trust!!

Did not help

Honna sjower hopefully thst helps ease my nind a little

Someone please talk to me don't let me be alonenwith my rhougts right now

God I hate BPD I hate it I hate it one minute I'm euphoric and the next minute I'm crashing please I just want to be normal what do I have to do to be normal would dhing make me rinally normal I want to do whatever it takes to finally be normal please let me have 1 day of being normal life plsss!!!!

Gonna use this account for both rants and doodles lmao

But I guess life is just about letting people see the ugly sides of you, and if they leave they leave, but if they stay even at your worst they're someone to keep close

Whenever there's people monitoring me that scares me alot, the anxiety of it makes me even more susceptible to my episodes, and even feeling like someone's watching my every move either online or in person is enough to set off my anxiety, I really hate it

In case y'all don't know what the pink triangle is, it was used back during the holocaust to label gay men and trans women that were imprisoned in the internment camps! And once the holocaust came to an end, those people still continued to suffer because of who they were

I feel like life's looking up, I'm self reflecting, apologized to someone I've hurt, my dad told me he knows he's the reason I'm in therapy and he feels horrible for it, I'm getting out of my depressive pit, my play is this week, and I'm genuinely just so happy. I haven't been this happy in forever.

Lowkey I don't wanna date for awhile because I've got shit I need to work on with myself before dating again, but the only issue is my issues only get worse when I'm in a relationship, fuck my mentally ill life

Need to be called a good boy in a romantic way 💔💔💔

WHY ARE MY ANXIETY SPIKES MOSTLY AFTER I TAKE MELATONIN LIKE GOD DAMN still gonna take it tho

I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm normal I'm

Positive stuff on this account this time hehe just cause I'm too lazy to switch accounts, bought stuff for my Con Parent's birthday present and I even got as many people as possible in a collab we're in to give me birthday wishes and positive words to write down for them :3 very excited hehehe

Btw trump stans have no place on this account or any of my other accounts

Oh well I'm gonna make a 16+ art account soon at some point cause I'm a FREAK (ppl don't know to what extent) and art is the best way to vent out my anxiety and holy shit why is the cold and warm switching again

So anxious I feel like I'm gonna throw up why did I let an attachment get this bad now I'm suffering the consequences over a month later still

If I hallucinate one more time tonight I am going to TWEAK out

Got too into my own head and now I can't sleep, why am I only getting worse now gotta wait until I'm so tired I pass out now

Gonna make an unfiltered vent account, it'll be anonymous Seek it out if you want, idrc, but it's gonna be the worst in me, I'm gonna share stuff that I don't ever tell anyone If anyone asks nicely enough I might share it with them

New additions to the Sunny lore :3 today was a fucking trainwreck let's hope tomorrow isn't worse!!!!!!

Everyday I debate on quitting colorguard why do I do this to myself

Colorguard has ruined friendships for me do NOT recommend

My therapist said that I'm stressing myself out too much with everything involving colorguard, having to STILL figure out stand dances so close to end of season, my home life and just everything I fear I might have a meltdown at some point

Eugh I hate being a super paranoid person when I have beef with ppl cause oh yeah no that person is toooooootally gonna turn everyone I know against me and I'll be all alone again

TRYING TO READ THIS MANWHA OR WEBTOON OR WHATEVER AND IT KEEPS STRESSING ME OUT OH MT GOD

Actually I might just keep my rants on twitter, what are they gonna do, train an Ai bot to be depressed???????

Wait lowkey what if I delete my rant posts after an hour of them being up