Highlights include "Something is wrong I can feel it" "No girl, no Marcy don't tell them that" "no no no no Sprig can't die nope no" "WHAT THE FUCK HE STABBED HER" "Well she can't be dead because she's on your poster"

Feeling very ew sappy gross gay today. I love my girlfriend so much oh my god. Now they're family knows we're in love and the positive reaction is so reassuring. Like, wow I'm on cloud 9

Hips don't lie; both in dancing and strapping. I am a homosexual.

My girlfriend told their very religious family that we are together and they are mostly getting positive responses and it's very very nice and wow what a breath of fresh air

Girlfriend thrifted a dinosaur onsie with a hood that has spikes on it. You might think "that is a completely wholesome thing to buy" and you would be correct. However, it's a little skin tight and leaves almost 0 anything to the imagination. This is not a complaint, but merely a humble brag.

Lover and I are going to watch True Colors rn, will report back later

Red fox sister and raccoon sister

Deserts are a trip because they're the most extreme with hot AND cold weather. Why does it get 0 degrees in Joshua tree when the sun goes down in February???? That's fuckin crazy dog

I forgot that gay people still ask other gay people about their "coming out story" as an ice breaker lol.

Ketchup is a jam/preserve change my mind

when people ask how old I am i keep adding a year so I am 48 today! Thank you all!

I'm really funny I promise

I think it should be the standard for all companies when they send those test phishing scam emails and if you fail them, a big pop up screen flashes in different colors going "IDIOT!! EVERYONE NOW KNOWS YOU FELL FOR IT" because holy shit

"Haley did you watch the games?" "Dude you know she doesn't like balls"

Did Soulja Boy ever tell em?????

Hear me out, a shot of espresso poured on top of a cold iced coke. Holy shit. Try it.

Hey guys, my girlfriend woke up next to me this morning and said "to know you is to love you" and then turned around and went back to sleep for another hour and I feel like I'm in a movie what the fuck is going on

A lot of people refer to me as "a little guy" every once in a while and it's incredible what the does to my overall self esteem

Fellas, is it gay to call another man's eyes and smile beautiful? Because I sure as hell think so but I can't tell my supervisor that no matter how hard the faggotry storm hails

Baseball fuckin sucks we should all watch women's' volleyball instead. For no apparent reason other than it's a GREAT sport.....

Why didn't anyone tell me that Elvira is gay???????

My dad has been in Utah for almost 2 weeks, oh my god I missed him

All of my important life decisions have started with me going "wouldn't it be funny if I ______" and thats how I ended up here. Truly it could be worse, things are pretty okay, I'm so tired but I'm fine.

I think that love(of all forms) is the single most effective and powerful tool against bigotry/close mindedness. The fact that anyone can love and be loved, so deeply and beautifully and authentically in their own right, is proof of the core essence we share. We are all beings who get to love.

My girlfriend who's not really a girl so my boyfriend but also not really a boy but like inbetween so I call them whatever the fuck I want and they're okay with it. My lover, my light, my little island getaway, my heart, my soul, my peace. Being in love is very cool.

"That's a spell from Harold Potter"

People that don't like olives need to grow up

"Oh no he looks like he's been on drugs...forever"

I've had 3 hours of sleep, can you tell?

"We went to the pound and came back with a boyfriend"

Never have I ever been blatantly flirted with in front of a presumable lover before in my life. It was fabulous, I was kissed on the hand and the cheek what the hell is in the water rn

Me: why is he (a supervisor, that I happen to love) so loud? Steve: I don't know he's weird he was homeschooled or something

Steve: *making gagging burping sounds* Me: dude are you okay? Steve: no, I'm getting old

Happy Scorpio season!!! I'm going to set fire to all of my enemies via telekinesis ✨💋

I need a red bull and a prayer

Babe, wake up Stevie Nicks Barbie doll just dropped and she's gorgeous

??????? What the fuck actually

"Happy Birthday Steven, fuck you"

Use the strap one time and now I think I'm hot shit. Like truly men should be afraid I am capable of stealing ur bitch

My autistic girlfriend while watching Marcy at the Gates: I like Marcy, she's cool Me: *rubbing my hands together as if I discovered some evil secret*

I think it's funny that my mom's name is spelled not conventionally and it's because my Japanese grandmother knew how to spell exactly 2 American names in the 60's And "Julie" was not one of them

"I've been meaning to swear less"

"I am someone who gets ONE bitch"

"Thank you Jesus for my depression"

Things about me: 1. Anything from Porto's Bakery is delicious and I would kill anyone for a single pastry 2. Back to Black by Amy Winehouse is one of the saddest songs anyone has ever written 3. Sasharcy

Trying to recharge my social battery as an introvert is like using a supercharger on an iPhone 6S and hoping that nothing blows up or catches on fire in the short amount of time the phone charges for

Be gay, start a mob, become the mob boss, participate in organized crime 🫶

Pardon my intense stare, my big autistic eyes just like to focus on the subject that is speaking I don't mean to look like I'm in love with everyone I meet, honest