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"I shall expect a chemical cure for psychopathic behavior by 10 A.M. tomorrow, or I'll have your guts for spaghetti." — a comic panel by Cotham
about 3 hours ago
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The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. — Edmund Burke
about 4 hours ago
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If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts. — Albert Einstein
about 6 hours ago
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Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurence of the improbable. — H. L. Mencken
about 8 hours ago
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Function reject.
about 10 hours ago
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When it is incorrect, it is, at least *authoritatively* incorrect. — Hitchiker's Guide To The Galaxy
about 13 hours ago
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To program is to be.
about 17 hours ago
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Weekends were made for programming. — Karl Lehenbauer
about 18 hours ago
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"You show me an American who can keep his mouth shut and I'll eat him." — Newspaperman from Frank Capra's _Meet_John_Doe_
about 19 hours ago
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There is no distinction between any AI program and some existent game.
about 24 hours ago
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Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
1 day ago
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The more data I punch in this card, the lighter it becomes, and the lower the mailing cost. — S. Kelly-Bootle, "The Devil's DP Dictionary"
1 day ago
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Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable. Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable. — Gilb
1 day ago
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The first myth of management is that it exists. The second myth of management is that success equals skill. — Robert Heller
1 day ago
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Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts -- for support rather than illumination.
2 days ago
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It's currently a problem of access to gigabits through punybaud. — J. C. R. Licklider
2 days ago
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We don't know who it was that discovered water, but we're pretty sure that it wasn't a fish. — Marshall McLuhan
2 days ago
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Neutrinos are into physicists.
2 days ago
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Even bytes get lonely for a little bit.
3 days ago
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It isn't easy being the parent of a six-year-old. However, it's a pretty small price to pay for having somebody around the house who understands computers.
3 days ago
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Some people pray for more than they are willing to work for.
3 days ago
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If you push the "extra ice" button on the soft drink vending machine, you won't get any ice. If you push the "no ice" button, you'll get ice, but no cup.
3 days ago
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How many weeks are there in a light year?
3 days ago
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If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary form.
3 days ago
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The "cutting edge" is getting rather dull. — Andy Purshottam
4 days ago
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The opulence of the front office door varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm.
4 days ago
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Every program is a part of some other program, and rarely fits.
4 days ago
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User hostile.
4 days ago
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Of course there's no reason for it, it's just our policy.
4 days ago
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Loan-department manager: "There isn't any fine print. At these interest rates, we don't need it."
4 days ago
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Any circuit design must contain at least one part which is obsolete, two parts which are unobtainable, and three parts which are still under development.
4 days ago
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"How many teamsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?" "FIFTEEN!! YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT?"
5 days ago
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Of course you can't flap your arms and fly to the moon. After a while you'd run out of air to push against.
5 days ago
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I had the rare misfortune of being one of the first people to try and implement a PL/1 compiler. — T. Cheatham
5 days ago
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Beware of the Turing Tar-pit in which everything is possible but nothing of interest is easy.
5 days ago
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Ummm, well, OK. The network's the network, the computer's the computer. Sorry for the confusion. — Sun Microsystems
5 days ago
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No extensible language will be universal. — T. Cheatham
6 days ago
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The herd instinct among economists makes sheep look like independent thinkers.
6 days ago
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Between infinite and short there is a big difference. — G.H. Gonnet
6 days ago
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Enzymes are things invented by biologists that explain things which otherwise require harder thinking. — Jerome Lettvin
6 days ago
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You need tender loving care once a week - so that I can slap you into shape. — Ellyn Mustard
6 days ago
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Tomorrow's computers some time next month. — DEC
6 days ago
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Remember: use logout to logout.
6 days ago
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A businessman is a hybrid of a dancer and a calculator. — Paul Valery
6 days ago
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"Imitation is the sincerest form of television." — The New Mighty Mouse
6 days ago
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Always draw your curves, then plot your reading.
6 days ago
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"The pathology is to want control, not that you ever get it, because of course you never do." — Gregory Bateson
6 days ago
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"I prefer the blunted cudgels of the followers of the Serpent God." — Sean Doran the Younger
7 days ago
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The two most beautiful words in the English language are "Cheque Enclosed." — Dorothy Parker
7 days ago
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e-credibility: the non-guaranteeable likelihood that the electronic data you're seeing is genuine rather than somebody's made-up crap. — Karl Lehenbauer
7 days ago
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