God he's so weak it's almost sad.

So, Carlos Alcaraz

Almost got to admire how when you look at Western Europe, Italy is objectively one of the gayest countries and it just doesn't care

Do it for Geronimo ❤️

If I'm ever not ugly, it's over for so many of you

Surely the complete opposite is true? He came in promising change after 14 years of managed decline and has done almost nothing different.

Reminder that my birthday is just over a month, so make sure you leave enough time to buy me some very expensive presents x

If 50 of my colleagues said they wanted me to resign I'd just cry right there in front of them in the office

God homeowners are so annoying "he doesn't want to accept your offer because he knows they usually go for more" when they usually sell in a week and his has been listed for over a month lmao

Hard to believe that nearly 400 people follow me here for no reason other than they all fancy the hell out of me

English should bring back þ and ð

I took a picture of my face this morning for a visa and it is immeasurably better than the passport picture I took last week and now I'm pissed off.

LETTUCE KEIR ON LEAF SUPPORT

🫡🇬🇧

I think there comes a point - let's call it the Salisbury Point - at which the public have simply made up their minds about a leading politician and literally nothing will dissuade them of that view. I'm not sure how to measure when that has happened exactly, but you know it when you see it...

I am shocked that a terrible Prime Minister is giving a terrible speech. Shocked.

At this point he could give the Gettysburg Address and it wouldn’t move the dial. In fact I think it would only further alienate voters, because it speaks more to the issues of mid 1860s America and also he’d be accused of plagiarism.

A six minute VAR farce probably deciding the title is so pathetically fitting of 'elite' football in 2026.

The PGMOL conspiracy against Arsenal strikes again 😔

I've decided I have zero opinions on the Scottish Parliament election

If Ed Miliband becomes leader, does everything reset to 22.00 on 7 May 2015?

Unfollow me if you didn't vote for Gina Miller's True and Fair Party btw 👍

Highlands and Islands really taking the piss here

Is that Change UK The Independent Group for Change??

Watching BBC Scotland, does anybody ever talk about anything other than independence? 😭

Welsh Labour losing seats when the size of the body increased by more than 50% 😭

Remember when Joanna Cherry lost her seat lol

this wasn't on my ballot paper

Can't believe that promising change and then delivering barely anything of note in two years really fucks people off 😔

Incredible how the local election results are simultaneously proving what every single person thinks parties should do to be 100% correct.

The Kemi Bounce is in full effect

Admiring PSG's magnificent football and the genius of Kvaraskhelia doesn't mean we should ignore that this club's official betting partner in Asia and Africa is one of the most "controversial" and destructive of all sportsbooks, 1xBet, which operates illegally in most markets.

Big fan of how voting Green in my constituency is actually an excellent way to reduce the number of separatist MSPs

Only doing this so people stop saying the words peach ballot

This picture has lived in my head rent free in my head for 48 entire hours

Can I shock you? I've actually love the French

Will this not just increase house prices by £10,000?

I think the people I hate most on instagram are the ones who've convinced themselves they're better than everyone else because they're a "traveller not a tourist". It's the same fucking thing.

Up at midnight looking at facelift prices again lol

Listening to Arsenal fans talk about all the pain they've suffered in the... *checks notes*... Champions League

Harry Kane to get Bayern's winner in the final

It's funny how when I'm using An App, the things I find most unattractive in other people are almost always things that are also what I look like

City are going to end up learning the hard truth that you just can't give Arteta's Arsenal more than seven chances to not shit the bed.

I am going to scream if I see one more post anywhere telling me how to use my peach ballot

Coins imo

I would like attractive people to stop going outside while I'm outside so I don't have to look at them.

Anybody want anything from Morrisons? Here's what I'm already picking up xxx

T is for her tooth-filled mouth

Reminder that my birthday is just over a month, so make sure you leave enough time to buy me some very expensive presents x

If you're mean to Plumbert, you're mean to me.