Every time I tell myself "We can work through this, if we just keep trying!" everything goes well for a couple days. And then things get said that make me wonder why I still would want to try. Things that make me want to just give up. But none of them end up being the last straw.

[Angel Hour PLUS] Catching up and catching Chaos Hellulu! Little round of NTE and a little catching up until i have to go to class - gonna be braindead, because it is way too hot... SORRY! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

Sometimes, when I am done with a project and get to leave my office, I remember that it’s NOT normal to sit for 24 hours at the desk non stop, working without taking a break, just to meet a deadline…

When a character death is already brutally painful, but then you see their loved ones break down into raw emotions over losing a part of themselves & it just hurts SO much more than the actual tragedy. I love my VAs who can make me bawl like a child alongside their performance.

Today is one of those days I'm reminded that I don't have a safety net when it comes to mental health emergencies. I have two people (left) I can talk to, to help me take of the edge and not to quit existence itself, and that's it.

Sometimes I really hate how much human attention I need to get to properly function in my day to day life...

Pulled my Elly clock out of the “forgotten things”-box so she can help me with not losing my track of time so nilly-willy anymore. Even after more than a year of being abandoned, she still remembers my time! ;; (I feel SO lucky, because I would NOT have known how to set it up!)

Fun, how I just nearly rage-quit all my projects for the one company who currently owns the lion's share of my working hours, because of miscommunication over a non-problem. Yes, I am emotionally stable. Totally alright. But maybe that was the wake-up call I needed right now...

I used to love my dog-like personality but this is reaching a point where I just can’t stand it anymore. I don’t want to feel like this anymore.

When your first try on an impromptu audio was so good, you wish you could back in time to actually press the record button this time, because this probably would have been the best take you got to record all month, but it’s lost to time now, because you didn’t trust you got it.

Whenever they catch up to me, I remember why I ran away in the first place.

It’s not even 7am yet and the sun is already piecing through the sky like nobody’s business… Let the little pigeon sleeps some more, please…

Running your body ragged to a point, where it barely wants to wake up anymore. I know I should know better. I know I am making it worse for everyone in the long run. But I still can’t hold back. “Just one more.” One more could be one too many. And I know that. I do know that.

If you spot this bag at Dokomi, feel free to say Hello! Please just tell the person wearing it who you are, if we know each other you. And if we don’t, tell them, how you know the Heavenly Realm’s most infamous runaway! Also, hugs are always allowed, but pictures are not!

Imagine having a whole pen full of golden geese and still treat them like some kind of tamagotchi you can neglect without consequences.

"Why are you texting people out of nowhere just to tell them, you like their work. Don't you worry about how that might look to them?" Because people can die at any time. I'd rather be perceived as annoyance than miss the chance to tell someone wonderful how I feel about them.

[Work Stream] Finishing the last concept plus breakfast [Handcam] Hellulu everyone! Last Working Stream for this week - this time with Breakfast, so I don't run out of energy again! Come by and vibe! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[Genshin] Let's kick some Angel's (?) butts! Hellulu everyone! The promised Genshin gaming stream is finally here! We will continue the quest in this place that seems like heaven! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

Short Work Stream - we need to finish one more concept for this week! Hellulu everyone! Another morning working stream, but today we won't go for too long - we'll have a separate gaming stream tonight! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[Work Stream] Let's Finish last Night's Script Concept, Shall we? Hellulu everyone! Another work stream since we weren't able to finish all of it last night! Feel free to join and to vibe in chat! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

WORKSHOP DONE! Hahah, that was freaking nerve wrecking, but I survived! Thinking that participating at workshops felt like too hard, and now I even got to lead one! So thankful I got recommended for this opportunity ;;

First autograph session done - holy moly, that was a LOT of people. Some even brought DVDs for me to sign… - I nearly cried! And not only because it is freaking STRESSFUL to scribble something on a collector edition!!!

Reserved a seat on the train, so I would have a desk to work on during the ride. Getting on the train, seeing a small, old man in my reserved seat. Walked past it & searched for another seat that would work out for me. Even if I paid for this seat, I will not make this man move!

[Angel Hour] Last Stream Before My Convention Trip - Forgive this selfish Angel! Hellulu everyone! I know it's late already, but since I have a busy convention weekend ahead, I wanted to have one last cozy Zatsu today! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[Working] Time to Finish another Script Concept ASAP... Hellulu everyone! Little two hour Working Stream because I am tired as hell and you need to force me to concentrate on work... LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[Working] This is not the right time slot at all?! - Let's get cozy and get some work done! Hellulu everyone! Early morning working stream! Your darling angel tries to give you some cozy background noise with a morning work stream! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[PGR] Missing Kamui - let's continue the Event Quest! Hellulu everyone! I know it is late, but I thought a late stream for you birdies, but I thought a late stream might better than no stream! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

It’s mother’s day! Allow me to send the greatest thanks to my vtuber mama (&papa!), @yokatokoichi.bsky.social, who four years ago gave me the ability to express - to all of you - my authentic and true self! You changed my life and I will never stop being grateful from the bottom of my heart!

[Experiment] Work Stream with Handcam?! Hellulu everyone! I am super behind on work but refuse to skip stream today - in hopes I will not regret it, let's have a work stream! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

The Promised Just Chatting Stream After Class! - Let's Talk about ANYTHING! Hellulu everyone! I ran a little late after class, but for those who want to procrastinate sleep: let's chat a little! I even have tea! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

Depressy-Whiney Angel back for some WuWa Main Quest Grind Hellulu everyone! Your silly feathered dumb-dumb might have got in over their head at work and is really down, so time to stream, right?! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

And once again I am stuck with writing scripts for a director whose work approach and ethics I despise. I should learn to say “no”, no matter how much of an “emergency” those projects are. Sighs. At least it’s only for a month…

[Short Gaming Stream] - What is up with Kamui?! Hellulu everyone! I am very late today and have to leave early, so we gonna take a QUICK look into the PGR event and call it a night! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[Caution] Sad Angel Continues WuWa main story Hellulu everyone! After more graduation notices, your favourite Angel ist left really depressed - only join stream if you are up for that! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

Late Night Tired Sleepless Angel Stream Hellulu everyone! Your tired Angel met their deadline today, even if just barely and is now tired to relax a little bit before bed! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

Ever heard someone sing and thought to yourself: all I wanna do in love is fall asleep to this voice forever?

2 Years Affiliate Anniversary Stream! - First Handcam ever! Hellulu everyone! Today is our Second Affiliate Anniversary! We gonna have our first Handcam Stream and build some penguins?! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[Gaming] PGR ➔ NTE ➔ Genshin Hellulu everyone! Your favourite emotionally compromised Angel is back for another Gaming Stream - Tonight's plan: PGR ➔ NTE ➔ Genshin LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[Chill Gaming] Bird brained Evening Stream Hellulu everyone! Second stream of the day! Your Angel is more tired than they expected to be, so their attention span is really short! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[First Time PGR] Sleepy Angel Early Stream Again Hellulu everyone! Early and probably short stream today, probably two hours, but we will be back for a second one tonight, so don't stress! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

[First Time PGR] Sleep Deprived Angel Chillin With Some Ravens, Or Something... Hellulu everyone! Early and probably short stream today, since the bird brain is not braining. We gonna continue Punishing Gray Ravens! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

Graduations used to make me sad, because I was going to miss those people who were leaving. Now they make me sad, because I realized that in a lot of cases a graduation happens when someone gives up on a goal they once wanted to achieve but now feel like it became impossible.

[Game Stream] [Demo] Are Yandere Guys hard to get or is my XP Bar just low? [3 Hour Stream] Hellulu everyone! Early Stream today! We gonna finish our run of the Knee Deep In Live Demo - hopefully with less commentary from my side! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

Late Night Stream of an Grumpy, Irritated Feathery Failure - I am sorry in advance!! Hellulu everyone! I know it is late, but your little angel is in a teeeerrible mood and needs an outlet! Only come in if you are up for it! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

I love that my that we get such a great insight into the mind of my favourite character this week, but man, I just want him to be happy... Seeing a traumatized person always find the fault in themselves whenever something bad happens is so heartbreaking...

Got a whooping 3 hours of sleep… Please, body… brain… can we safe the anxiety outburst for AFTER the deadline on Monday morning? Please? Thanks.

When you ponder the whole day about sending or not sending a DM, the decide to actually do it and get exhausted solely by the build up of adrenaline finally leaving your body. Being a human is so freaking hard, man. I am not build for this.

[Milestone] Lowkey 3rd Anniversary - No celebration, just little get together and maybe a game! Hellulu everyone! Three years ago today, this little Angel had their first stream right here on Twitch. Wanna get all nostalgic with me? LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides

6am, on my way to the convention with my bestest buddy in the world! Look at himself, all handsome, draped in @pawsitivitri.bsky.social merch! We gonna cheer them on SUPER LOUDLY for their new set today at AniMUC!!!

[Work Stream] Your dearest feathery creature has to catch up on some paperwork - wanna chill out and watch a concert in the background? Hellulu everyone! Your sleep deprived angel needs to get some more work done, but feel free to enjoy a cozy time in chat! LIVE NOW 🔴 www.twitch.tv/lucielprides