You know you don't actually need that band-aid any more when you look down and notice that you've been wearing it on the wrong finger all day.

Redditors who don't get it: "I hate that community college doesn’t offer dorms!"

Best Chinese joke, number 4:"Materialist Dialectics." youtu.be/iwHInaBRoE0?...

They say Gen Z can't write in cursive. But don't worry, I can assure you they've found a substitute. Their printing is as illegible as your handwriting was when you were their age.

Please do not label your feed NSFW unless you regularly post titties.

There is no problem too vaguely stated or ill-defined that cannot be solved with additional bureaucracy and paperwork.

Maybe I went too far

Valentine's Drawing. I am getting progressively more normal.

Last week, week before I was listening to someone criticize protesters for violating other people's freedom of religion by invading a church under the auspices of freedom of speech. It seems like no one understands what either of those two things mean.

"The outhouse in the bottom right is base on an outhouse I read about in a Buddhist monastery situated on a cliff looking over Lake Poyang where they built the toilets out over the lake. For cleanliness."

Okay, I don't know why I'm getting your ad while listening to a lawyer talk about ICE's authority under statutory law, but you go through a lot a circumlocution to almost say something very interesting: "Most birth control pills don't work for fat women. Ours do."

The zines I ordered from France are still waiting for Trump to chicken out.

This gravy is very good. What else can you eat with it? Nobody knows. There's never been any left over to find out.

Q: Why does all sculpture look like dicks?

Obviously, the blue parallelepiped has three times the volume of the orange pyramid when they share three edges.

Here's my philosophy of whether or not I am going to take time the time to manually adjust your score on your on-line homework: Am I the shithead? or are you the shithead? If I'm the shithead, I will work for hours on the issue. If you're the shithead, fuck off. And I judge the shitheadedness.

Unrelatedly, how can you simultaneously believe in free will and psychopharmacology?

How philosophy ruins everything. youtu.be/CigjlMOEg90?...

"I'm swearing off Instagram and X, where it's too easy to get a distorted sense of the public's concerns." -Vivek Ramaswamy I don't know.

"The acquittal rate of those who were accused under the various English witchcraft acts was over 80%. This reflects the persistent legal problem that it is difficult to prove somebody is guilty of an imaginary crime." --Alec Ryrie, 6 May 2020 www.youtube.com/live/UNh7Owd...

What happened after Noriega?

Everything looks like a penis. Exhibit 1. Comparisons between coordinate systems. This morning's comment, "That arrow looks like a wang."

"My point is that [it] doesn't take a year to produce 140 pages. I worked up 1-2 pages over 3-5 hours a day on top of all my other comics-making and self-publishing, not to mention parenting and my photography side hustle that actually generates income."

Pokemon Imperialism www.youtube.com/watch?v=KB-j...

Google has a toy dreidel when you search for "dreidel." My phone's autocorrect doesn't know what a "dreidel" is. share.google/5fCfBU7b6gpq...

These silhouettes are disgusting. I can't show them to anyone. I thoroughly enjoyed making them.

This time you really were bad, bad, bad, bad

Well, the plotting with these guys is DONE. Unfortunately, the final product from the SECRET ROBOT exchange has to go to Australia (as I found out on Tuesday), so I really should have sent this on November 10th, a week before Arik announced it.

1970's cartoon: Star Blazers Saucy robot sexually harasses female crew member.

Much better than I thought it would be. Love the Catch-22 analysis. www.youtube.com/live/Tzf2Lar...

So I'm drawing this picture of a robot-guard dog tearing the throat off of a robot Elf from the the Robot Elf Assault team in the White House, and I'm starting to think: Maybe this isn't really the cute Christmas story I'd envisioned it to be.

"Was I being mean?" "You're always mean when I'm yelling at you."

The technical quality of your work is irrelevant if it never gets done.

I used to live in an apartment behind this theater. Well, behind the bowling ally next to this theater. Assuming it's the one in Englewood. And it looks loke it.

The world has gotten so bad that even the roses have to wear tin-foil hats.

My dream wasn't working properly last night, so I called tech support. And that turned it into a nightmare.

Why do women love robots so much? They're just more fun than you.

People prefer to talk to AI doctors about their problems, because they don't want to be judged by snooty nurses. People prefer to complain to human operators about customer service problems, because they enjoy the power of being able to harangue people who have no choice but to listen.

I think I'll listen to this video on "How Do I Overcome Comparison" while I obsessively map out the matchings in Draw Me a Robot's October competition -- where I'm getting tossed out in the first round again. I'll be less pissy about it this month that I was last month. youtu.be/UO9nUHsn28s?...

"The van der Waals equation* predicts a critical point...Above the critical temperature, the system cannot separate into two phases in equilibrium...corresponding to Marxism, which cannot be split into two classes. Below the critical temperature, the capitalist society consists of two phases."

Mythopoetic Interpretations of the Historical Moment provide Hope and Meaning for the Alienated and Lost [I guess]

Weird getting one of your own book reviews recommended to you on the YouTube algorithm. But maybe it shouldn't be.

All of the political problems in this world come from a basic disagreement that pervades society: do you cut your sandwiches horizontally or diagonally. Y cuts them diagonally. You can imagine what happened when she saw that I cut one sandwich diagonally, and then I cut then next one horizontally.

It's like that advice they always give you in Creative Murder classes: Kill who you know.

Hawk flying in a spiral around tree branch trying to catch a squirrel that's running up it in circles as I type.