I need to not be so type B sometimes. It’s a holiday weekend, my flight leaves in less than 2 hours and I’m still 20 mins from the airport. I have the audacity to have luggage I didn’t prepay for either 🥴

Got my man to take my trash out. Hope he realizes that he now has a chore at Barbie’s dream house

Proud of myself for chopping and freezing veggies I know I won’t use before they go bad!

I’m seriously undecided. Feed in braids with some boho pieces in the front, knotless, or Senegalese twists? Send help!

This man is an indica warrior and I’m a sativa queen. No wonder I fall asleep every time I go over there. All I do is eat, get cold, and go to sleep

Mad I put milk in this bowl of cereal and now my stomach is saying never mind

I told this man about what full moons do for me and now I’m a werewolf 😂

I love that I live walking distance from things like restaurants and bars. Lemme get full and tipsy then walk home

Is Kenzie about to start an only fans after this? #loveisland

Favorite compliment of the day, “I met my match in you” Call me big mama!

I’ve swallowed 2 cherry pits this weekend. Am I gone grow a cherry tree?

Have I watched the last 2 episodes of Love Island? No. Am I planning to vote tonight? Yes. Sue me

I might have quit cooking for a while and I’m not even mad at it. I just need to find a place that makes decent Mac n cheese because that’s what I have a taste for currently

Whoever said that love island is available after 8:30 deserved a kiss in the mouth

Mr flirty neighbor saw me getting out my car again and asked if I got his phone number he left on my car. I told him no. Fake took his number. I gotta put on some big girl panties to deal with this obviously

Week 1 of summer school is over and my throat has a lil tickle to it. Keep yall sick ass kids at home!

Yesterday my neighbor asked me if I was single and I said until I’m married. Today I go to my car and his name and number are on a gum package. What do I do?

I live less than a mile from a dispensary and they have decent deals

I hope I don’t fall asleep at this movie because a girl is tired

Dude who has me smitten wants to go on a third date tomorrow. Third date in 2 weeks. Let’s see how I feel about him in a few more weeks

Apparently watching tonight’s love island wasn’t enough drama for me because I’m rewatching the Bear

I went on a second date with a handsome, childless, educated, man and we yapped for hours. Let’s see what happens

That man rubbed my right calves, cuddled me, and dicked me down. I need some alone time

I been joking with my daddy that he needed to get the shingles vaccine because he’s a boomer who had chicken pox in college. 40 years later who went to the hospital twice for shingles? My daddy

Just two big niggas, a semi useless dolly, and a 4th floor apartment 😂

A dude I used to talk to and a dude I’m currently talking to finished moving me into my apartment. I love this for me

I should have gone to dinner with my coworkers. I been tryna get out this parking spot for at least 10 mins

I want my baddies chain. I successfully wore my wedges to graduation and in flat footed as hell. Also, I walked 3000 steps at least in said wedges around the damn convention center

Today was the last day of school. Tomorrow is key turn in day and we have an illegal meeting at 8 AM. I was gonna get there when I get there. Why you making me come to a meeting at 8?

I think that man’s dick had some melatonin in it because why am I tryna go to sleep at 7:18 PM?

And I get my rent discounted for June. Small favors 🤘🏾

I moved and I’m calling my new place Barbie’s penthouse because I live on the 4th floor. I had a heavy package delivered and the elevator isn’t working…

I love a mumu but sleeping in an oversized soft tee shirt just does something for me

Why would you FaceTime me early in the morning unprovoked? I’m not answering that

Whenever my egg headed ex would act up I would be pissed because why you short, unattractive, and have this much audacity?

Somebody who I matched via Facebook dating in 2024 text me yesterday and was saying he wanted to know what he did wrong. Sir, who are you? Why do you think I know what you did wrong? We never even met in person

My students graduate next Friday. I’m currently taking down my micro braids. Do I come braids or auntie pixie cut for graduation?

My apartment complex elevator works finally but it’s raining 😂 do I move some shit in or nah?

My schedule for next year has 4 preps. I’m ready to cry because what?

I was at a man’s house last night and did not sleep well. The dick was good but I’m sleepy 😫

I moved this weekend to an apartment that cuts my work commute in half. Guess who made it to work on time today?

I put unleaded 88 in my car today… let’s see how this goes

A coworker pointed at my collarbone and told me I’m sick because she can see it. Babe, I worked hard so you can see it. Leave me alone!

It’s secret staff spirit week at work. Tomorrow is crazy hair day and a bald man asked me what he should do tomorrow. I never cackled so hard before in life

My job did a signing day for the seniors. The valedictorian and the student ranked #5 (who are dual enrolled at colleges in the area) fought at the ceremony. Anyways, it’s 15 days left this year

It’s my AKAversary, my half birthday, and teacher appreciation week. I deserve to be treated to all the goodies

Mad that I finally got on top of a car and was acting scared to shake sumn. In my defense, the car is small and I still think I’m a big body Benz

It’s teacher appreciation week. Send love to your fave educators. We’re severely overworked and underpaid!

The pregnant and sober peeps still want an NA wine or beer sometimes

The men who get on dating sites and probe women about their dating life instead of trying to get to know a woman throw me every time. Do you want me or the man who wants to date me?