Guy is obviously having a great day, shirtless and barefoot and smoking a huge doobie on the walking trail, and all I can hear is my grandma saying “that’s how you get ringworm”

Tell them it’ll cost an approximate amount of bitcoin. Now tell them they have to send a different approximate amount from another wallet. Now hide the fees and make those approximate.

Sushi is a health food. I will not succumb to this anti rice propaganda.

I completely understand why old people look at everything like they can’t believe it.

Getting my oil changed with a woman watching Facebook AI slop on full volume on one side and a guy anxiously bouncing his legs on the other and I’m so overstimulated I’m going to explode.

I know what they say about frontal lobes is true because why else would I have been wearing this shirt to check in to five star hotels when I was 20? We didn’t even have crypto, there was no excuse.

Me: so uhhhh, I didn’t look into this too much… Him: are you asking about food?

Chat this ~60 year old guy is saying this ~30 year bartender was the hottest thing the town has ever seen 15 years, ago AITA for thinking he’s a pervert? If Bluski had a poll option it would be A) she was too young B) fair game C) I’ll cover drinks

In a terrible Instagram loop where I go to block a Ahegao girl and it gives me more Ahegao girls.

We had the dollar menu and auto correct that actually worked man, we had it all.

We had the dollar menu and auto correct that actually worked man, we had it all.

Plumber was cutting some roots and said “that one was almost too thick” and I instinctively went “oh there’s no such thing” literally what is wrong with me

Omfg I thought I did such a good job of hiding everything but I just looked over his shoulder and the plumber is all under the sink with a mould of Connor’s dick lord if you’re there please just strike me down

Shaving your bush after a while is such a top tier feeling like I am just *gliding* around this house smooth as butter

It’s so funny when I’m the one discovering pourns I’ve made

Need help getting your steps in? March Charlotte 5-6 Charleston 10-14 Florence 17-18 Columbia 19-20 Charleston 20-25 Raleigh 26-28 Sumter 30-31 April Fayetteville 2-3 Charleston 7-11 Summerville 14-15 Charlotte 16-18 Raleigh 23-25 #datecarolinas #datesc #datenc #oursky #luxurycompanion #fmty

Neighbor hurt herself trying to vandalize my property and it’s all on camera

I have once again lost the “have a normal experience putting an animal to sleep” challenge like why did the vet have to audibly fart in there.

Picking out the least rotted produce from the cart like a medieval peasant during the war

The reason you can’t give a single inch on anything be it trans rights or dignity for unhoused people is that they, democrats and republicans alike, will take it and say thanks what else is in your pockets? They won’t say thanks actually.

Standing over anyone who comes to work on the house like a dog when you don’t need help

Asked the plumber if I could get him something to drink so many times I could see him start worrying about his kidneys 🫠

Guys with tongue rings are everything girls with septum piercings are accused of being.

20 year old cat showed up at the barn and when we called the lady on the microchip she said to just keep him dude my hearrrrt 😭

I just wanted to give everyone a heads up, since a lot of you have met her over the years… my big dog is letting me know it’s her time, so I’ll be home instead of Raleigh this week to help her go. Thank you to everyone who gave her lovins, you helped make her a very happy girl 💔

Mk my dad just said “jestermaxxing” it’s time to wrap it up.

God I love a good sale.

I feel bad that people used to worry so much about rain dances because I wasn’t around to try and put up a fence

I feel like such a spazz every time I go on Reddit. Just throwing my pictures out into the world, and waiting for them to get deleted cause I made the title a question and that is not allowed. 🤷‍♀️

Mind if I wake you up like this?

AI is ruining everything - I googled why my knee hurts and WebMD didn’t even pop up to tell me I was gonna die.

An important repost ❤️

An important repost ❤️

I can’t believe this Americas Next Top Model documentary is making me feel bad in my 30s. This was insane. Just traumatizing those girls 😳

I want one of those flame thrower things for the weeds

I…. I think I just found my therapist’s alt Instagram where he sits in his car and makes fun of fuckbois?

Happy Valentine’s, #oursky 🥰

$4800 for a water heater lmao buddy get back in the truck, don’t even put it back together.

TGIF 🥰 #DateCarolinas #DateSC #DateNC

Elon should invent a way to go east or west without driving directly into the sun.

Not gonna lie, I thought the boomers would come up with a more creative way to game the system for all their equity than just ending property tax.

The little movements you only do because you’re at whork crack me up. Like if I opened a fridge like Charlotte, I think people would ask if I’m on drugs.

Bad Bunny at the Super Bowl vs that greasy guy at the pedo concert? Like stealing candy from a baby. Which, you’d think they’d be able to see coming.

You wouldn’t wonder how I missed your message if you saw how many bottles of soy sauce I have in the fridge.

I don’t like all the faces Apple Pay recognizes

Hate when a tech successfully kicks something that I wanted to kick in the first place

Telling the vet what the kids named this barn cat was more humiliating than anything I’ve ever posted on the internet.

Do you think Oprah regrets Dr Oz like the Labroodle guy regrets those dogs?

Going down? I am 😈

I do really like this about this app. You can create an actual “for you” feed, rather than just random stuff crammed down your throat.