"He's headed your way." "The snack machine?" "You guys left me in the parking lot." "I'm stuck in the bathroom." "Wait... you guys left without me?"

We're all definitely on a WEIRD list now. www.instagram.com/reel/DUW_sZo...

Hey. It's my diminishing respect for Tom Cruise.

Pain is kind of nudging me into a weird way.

Yes I followed him after Primer, and I love it.

Oh hey, it's the only Shyamalaman movie I didn't yell the twist out in the theatre at the beginning.

Oh, I spent SuperBowl Sunday doing 4 tire works and I didn't even have to burn a body.

My hands are exploding drugs time.

Fuck people who demand your attention. Maybe sometime anything you consider one thing is another.

OW I CAN'T SLEEP. Probably the last Oliver Stone film I ever cared about.

Forgot to mention, blew out tendons in both forearms this week, a little while after a flat tire, and a flat spare. Had appropriate tires replaced today. I look like the human torch.

Wow, I mismanaged this shelf a lot

So, how's your Willenium going?

Holy cow, Tommy Lee Jones was a hunk.

Still... Mitch Pileggi was kind of jacked.

www.instagram.com/reel/DUOrwTt... The wee 'uns.

God, The X-Files makes Vancouver look so bleak. Smallville, Psych, and Supernatural make it look amazing. Especially Psych.

Sharp

The other week, former WWE wrestler, and exchanging Governor of Minnesota Jesse Ventura suggested that Minnesota become Canada's 11th province. Jesse Ventura.

BY THE POWER OF GREYSKULL, I'M IN THE SHOWER!

My mum was uni roommates with Twiggy.

Do the hustle. www.instagram.com/reel/DT-eHYg...

Carney. www.instagram.com/p/DT3TzV8kqO...

Goodnight to a Canadian Icon.

*reads headline* NOTHING IS TRUE! *runs into woods* *runs out of woods* M&M CARAMELS ARE PRETTY GOOD THOUGH, AND I LIKE KISSING. IT'S NEAT. *runs back*

People are so mad at me me for tons of things. Stay on it, if it's gonna kill you, I say.

After decades, Jim Thirlwell is saying goodbye to Foetus. I am sad. youtu.be/KB03vkWFq0M?...

So here's the real idea. Keep your neighbourhoods thriving. Take care of themselves.

I SAW IT! I SAW THE GREEN I SAW IT!

You are not magistry by what you pretend to be. You cannot force people to love you. You will never be afraid without knowing fear. Make us afraid, and you will fear us.

Identity has cost me comfort and life, and probably love. None of those will kill me now, though.

My Sister and Brother in Law gave me a very generous gift via bandcamp, so you're all going to get some highly digested cuts on music that nobody knows, and... J.G. Thirlwell's end of Foetus.

DOGS AND DARK FORESTS - check Bandcamp.

Done. The alt texts aren't necessary. It's my finished Lego Jaws set.

The past 48 hours have yielded... A flat tire (and a flat spare) A malfunctioning air filtration machine Lapsed home insurance and... One really great mortadella sandwich. It was a very good sandwich, but I'm still losing the week.

*wakes in the dead of night to strange noises from the living room. Grabs weapon and pushes the door open. A ghost sits on the couch, eating popcorn & watching TV* "Dammit... Bryan." "Sorry, Johnny. Just watching some Iron Chef reruns. Wanna join?" "... Yeah." PARANORMAL INACTIVITY

I dreamed that I had a hole drilled into my chest, but it was fitted with a safety fitting so that meant it only bled sometimes, in different positions? Like, I'd roll over in bed and a fucking gallon of blood would just pour out my chest from this dime sized hole.

HAH! I DID IT! FUCK YOU BIRTHDAY!

We need a fighting game exclusively starring only the members of Avantgardey.

"Cause of Death?" "How bad the Dexter finale sucked." "Ooooh, rough way to go." "There are indications of How I Met Your Mother, too." "Poor bastard."

As much as I love Italian cuisine, Costco's Spanish olive oil is out of this world good.

If I had a mynah bird, I'd train it to make the motion detector sound from Aliens and walk around with it on my shoulder so when it made the noise I'd be like "Oh God! 30 meters! 25! 20! Man, they're inside the goddamn room!"

As if I needed more evidence of my increasing decrepitude, I earnestly used the phrase "Well blow me down," in casual conversation with a Gen Z'er today.