Waxed Lemon, who seems to need a holiday every few days because his endless attention seeking is so exhausting, has now been deported from first Colombia then Panama. Good to see these countries controlling their borders to keep the undesirables out. 😂

This 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 idiocy has finally reached Tunbridge Wells, which I drove through today - enjoy your house price drop.

I’m not saying Britain has gone entirely batshit crazy but a Reform councillor in Wales has just stormed out of a local Torfaen Council meeting in Gwent because it failed to acknowledge the killing of a man in America. In other news, Britain has gone entirely batshit crazy.

*Unless it is Cameron being replaced by May, May being replaced by Johnson, Johnson being replaced by Truss, or Truss being replaced by Sunak. It is only if Starmer goes. Absolute. Charlton. Hypocrite. Imbecile.

The demented court jester media is describing Kruger as a Tory ‘big beast’. Shows how low we’ve sunk - the guy served as a very junior minister for about five minutes during a time when the Tories were reshuffling the deck chairs on the Titanic almost every day. A nonentity.

Brexit Britain in one image.

Gordon Brown is spot on. Of course huge gambling companies, a cancer on society, should pay higher taxes in order to lift millions of children out of poverty. Child poverty causes social division and, later, crime. It’s incredible we are even debating this. Just do it.

The only refugees Reform seem to like are people fleeing the Tory Party.

Someone in Reform has found an old Tory barrel and is scraping things out of the bottom - first Dorries now Kruger. Who’s next, Peter Bone?

Who better to represent the interests of the working man than Danny Kruger, he being an old Etonian son of a wealthy property developer & Dame Prue Leith, as well as having been political secretary to old Etonian Boris Johnson. He’ll smash the metropolitan elite in no time.

2012 United. 2025 Urinated.

Man who has spent years fomenting a culture of social unrest now hinting that the left is murderous. What a disgrace he is. All political violence is wrong, full stop, and there is no monopoly on it by either side. Thank god we don’t have America’s idiotic gun obsession here.

Absolutely stunned and shocked to read that Boris Johnson may not have been entirely clear about some of his arrangements since leaving office.

On the other hand, I suppose having an anti vax conspiracist nut job persuading an entire room full of Reform supporters not to use vaccines has its upsides…💡

Can we get some sort of emergency text alert whenever Andrea Jenkyns is about to burst into song?

Mogg to advise Farage on ‘how to govern’. He spent just 3 years in government, 2.5 of which were being a court jester Leader of the House, not exactly a great office of state, then the absurd Minister for Brexit Opportunities, then 49 days at Business. He then lost his seat. 🤦🏻‍♂️

I think if your surprise conference stars are Nadine Dorries, Andrea Jenkyns and Lucy Connolly it’s probably time to put the bottle down and have a good old think about how life is going.

A party that wants to govern is proudly parading a woman who demanded buildings full of people be burnt down, platforming an imbecile who thinks vaccines caused cancer in the royals, and parading a ‘star line-up’ of weirdos who can’t even sing the national anthem. Er, off you fuck. 👋

Well it’s good night from Singapore, which feels sufficiently far from Birmingham. I look forward to waking up to a bin fire of idiocy on the timeline.

Live coverage as Andrea Jenkyns opens the wrap up conference gala night.

Sorry that was the Reform conference? Is that it? Wheeling on the political binfire that is Nadine Dorries and then that mad person dressed as Cilla Black in a Xmas special singing a song she wrote when she was a ‘rock star’ in some village in 1982? Christ.

Those criticising the credentials of David Lammy to be Deputy Prime Minister seem to have forgotten the office was recently held by such well known luminaries as Oliver ‘the privet hedges of Hertfordshire’ Dowden and Therese Coffey, seen here relaxing after a long day at work.

I’m old enough to remember the Tory government when the entire Parliamentary Party, including members of the cabinet who had been appointed like yesterday evening had to write letters to their PM ordering him to go as he sat in his Moroccan brothel themed flat listening to ABBA.

Next time a Tory or Reform politician resigns swiftly after conceding an error they themselves brought to the public’s attention I’ll listen to them braying about Angela Rayner. Until then, sit down.

Reform is a magnet for racists without a home, a bin for failed Tory MPs without a future, a crèche for brainwashed children with no clue about anything, and a stage for morons who want to dress up in glittery flags, shouting. It is anything but a serious government in waiting.

Says person who was intimately involved in sealing its extinction.

Dorries will no doubt be welcomed into Reform in the way you welcome your shitfaced great aunt to the family portrait at a wedding.

In her latest bid to get a seat in the House of Lords, village idiot Nadine Dorries has joined Reform UK, raising its average IQ by at least half a point.

People in Edinburgh explaining why they spent hundreds of pounds to go and hear Boris Johnson speak has put me into a sort of bewildered trance. Dear god. 🤦🏻‍♂️

Oh this is utterly stupendous, well done. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿😂🤦🏻‍♂️

I see the new Greens are going for the shoplifting vote. I’ll say it again - I don’t care how pure or left or ‘moral’ you think your politics are - this kind of positioning is electoral suicide. It’s batshit and divides progressives. Go and talk to some mainstream voters. 🤦🏻‍♂️

Good for him.

Wondering if taxpayers ought to fund the production of a few million flag branded dildos and the government could post them out to flag shaggers who sign up so they can get it all out of their system in the privacy of their own homes instead of defacing public spaces. 💡 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

No comic actor could do a parody of a Tory MP better than this.

Is this Yvette Cooper’s fridge.

Farage is such a patriot he’s currently giving evidence to another country’s parliament, when his own, in which he is supposed to represent his constituents, has just returned to work.

I think I may have been wrong earlier, and too quick to judge. We need human beings like this in public life, and in politics, or what hope is there. I hope she is cleared.

There has never been a bigger tosspot in British politics than this utter failure.

I think people will quickly clock that the new Green Party, apart from having some, well, rather ‘niche’ views on issues most of the public don’t give a crap about, is basically Corbyn Momentum 2.0 with slicker media performance. This doesn’t win an election or form a government.

Bit of a pile on from Corbyn/hard left types. They're as bad as the far right, always were. But the beauty is here you can block them and never see them again. Thank god!

Kemi Badenoch can't even land a killer blow when the actual Deputy PM and Housing Secretary, sitting opposite her, has just been found to have underpaid a property tax. She is deliriously, impressively, cataclysmically useless.

Despite the difficult circumstances around her son she will have to resign. You can’t have a government planning to clobber people with property taxes with a Deputy PM underpaying her own. We’d have said it of the Tories and we have to be consistent. Our politics is broken.

Polanski is the literal opposite of what a left of centre party with any interest in power should be projecting. It will be a complete catastrophe. Virtually every word makes Farage do a little wee of excitement.

It makes me chuckle that even if you sent back every migrant to where their journey began on a deportation flight tonight, not a single far right protestor would be better off, work harder, or notice a single benefit to their lives, other than those they already claim.

A hard left party, awkwardly glued in some form to the new ‘populist’ Greens, is going to go precisely nowhere useful. They will also fall out with each other and themselves. I cannot compute the silliness and naivety of people claiming otherwise. They learn nothing. Ever.

I've already spotted the problem with what the Greens have just done.

Investment advice from Liz Truss, I’ve just soiled myself.

With apologies for the bad language but what in the gibbering Hades is this fucking nonsense?

This neatly puts how I’ve been thinking about

Absolute state of this old racist, abusing a Muslim couple. I hope the local police in Leicester have paid him a visit.