Why the fuck is the entire trailer for this talking sheep movie set to “Psycho Killer”?

Happy to wake up to a breakfast TACO. (Going back to sleep now.)

I feel like the issue with this novel is less “author may have used AI” and more “author turned a shitty horror movie few people watched 10 years ago into a book.”

Haven’t yet looked at reviews for READY OR NOT 2 but I already refuse to see it theatrically based on the aggressive IMDb “banner” ad that occupies my entire huge window.

Just read a review (or, more accurately, started reading it) that deems a film “outlandish and absurd in equal measure.” I miss copy editors so very much.

Well you’re missing that if two categories should be 100% correlated then clearly one of them is redundant.

It says a lot about my personality that I must resist the impulse to block people who like every tweet I make. “I’m not that funny!”

Took me a second.

STEELY DAN!

I walked into the other room for a second and came back expecting to see Best Picture presented by Debra Winger and Richard Gere.

Okay, give me odds on the next presenter bringing the “Golden” team back.

Think I speak for all of us when I ask What the hell was VIVA VERDI!?

Autumn Durald Arkapaw shot “Falling,” clearly anyone who wants to win Oscars should be trying to make Haim videos.

This is almost precision-tooled for maximum Best Picture suspense.

Is it. Is this world intricately stitched together.

FRANKENSTEIN: last year’s craftiest film.

Sean Penn, an actor I very much admire, has now won three Oscars for performances I don’t much like.

Last tie, statisticians? Obviously there was the big Actress one, my entire lifetime ago.

Last tie, statisticians? Obviously there was the big Actress one, my entire lifetime ago.

She was the casting director for GHOST WORLD, FYI.

TIL men can be casting directors too.

Still feeling emotional on Madigan’s behalf. I think tonight I’ll rewatch the first movie I saw her in, 42 years ago (STREETS OF FIRE).

Now recreate ONE BATTLE’s car chase.

That “I never believed this would happen” reaction is what this is for.

In “Celebrity Skin” Love derisively refers to someone as a model-actress, which I now always mishear as Marvel actress and that still works.

I’m starting to really fucking despise Cloudflare.

Top five all-time poster image + tagline.

@lanius.bsky.social Tokyo-Ga or Tokyo-ga? I see both used and the onscreen title is all caps, no help.

No deepfake video will ever disorient me as much as discovering just now that none of APOCALYPSE NOW’s voiceover narration is spoken by Martin Sheen. (It’s his brother.)

Apparently there’s some new show called VLADIMIR and I’m bummed that it doesn’t appear to be a GODOT prequel that spends eight episodes awaiting Estragon’s arrival.

NOOOOOOOOOO!

TIL every human being currently alive will be long dead before a Greenland shark born today reaches sexual maturity.

Wallace Shawn's getting crankier in his old age.

I’ve seen films at eight, including four of the top 10 (which is really just a by-product of having lived for many years in NYC and near L.A.). Their ranking must heavily weight programming over aesthetics and presentation, though. Otherwise Film Forum as the 3rd-best theater on Earth is insane.

“I hear you, not a fan of that moron, what about *this* moron?” For three more years.

More of this please.

How do you design the U.S. marketing for this film and not use the tagline Whatever he chooses, it amounts to the same. Absolutely nothing. He’s alive. He’s dead. He’s… (Oh I just realized why not.)

Why not give us a little slider thingy so we can make the deal ourselves? We’ll feel strong!

This is like the critics who now claim they always disliked SHREK when I (a true SHREK-hater from before it even opened) can prove they voted ‘pro’ back in 2001.

Why does nobody understand how to play hardball with the studios? The correct response here isn’t to cave; it’s pulling SCREAM 7 from the site and having search redirect to an explanation of exactly why that was done. Let Paramount ban individual critics from press screenings if they want to.

It’s kind of amazing that you can hear just the first note of “I Want You Back” dimly muffled over mall food court speakers and instantly recognize what song it is.

Transferred my Patreon review of OCCUPIED CITY to Lbox and was reminded that almost nobody saw what’s really a fascinating Steve McQueen film. I’d encourage folks to seek it out at some point. It looks daunting but I for one wasn’t bored at all. boxd.it/5VTZff

Bought a different roll-on deodorant than my usual while traveling a while back and it went dry today after one arm. So now I’m wearing a different deodorant brand under each arm and am embarrassed to go out in public.

It truly annoys me that nobody’s left to say “This makes it look as if Del Toro made KPOP DEMON HUNTERS,” rephrase.

And now I’m legitimately embarrassed not to have seen this joke coming, but I did not and it nearly destroyed me. youtu.be/tFp0asRbU2w?...

I don’t quite understand the NIRVAN[N]A THE BAND webseries joke in which Matt says, for no reason that makes any contextual sense “SEX AND THE CITY theme!” and Jay immediately sits at the piano and starts playing the theme to the ‘90s animated X-MEN show, but it made me laugh anyway.

Congratulations to ELLA MCCAY on getting a higher Skandies average than SPANGLISH (but not than HOW DO YOU KNOW). #fridaynightpartyanimal

“This piece should really be written by someone Gen X.” “What if the best writer for it is just honorary Gen X?” “You mean Vikram? [Boyega voice] Allow it.”