MAGA is coming apart at the seams.

BREAKING: Republicans in Congress are beginning to worry Trump wanted the Qatari plane to flee the country because the secret service won’t let him escape to Buenos Aires on Air Force One.

BREAKING: Trump’s lawyers are reportedly panicking because the Democrats Trump claimed are bigger Epstein criminals than him can now sue him for defamation and access all the hidden Epstein Files during discovery to interrogate Trump in a deposition that will be made public.

More bad news for Trump, he's losing his base!

BREAKING: Donald Trump says it’s impossible to know what his recent MRI found because it’s a magnet, the most mysterious object in the universe.

BREAKING: A recently lapsed MAGA fan says he can't help but notice that, instead of the gays and transgenders, all the groomers and pedophiles keep turning out to be Republican politicians, Evangelical youth pastors, and Donald Trump.

BREAKING: A MAGA fan who applied to be an ICE agent for the $50,000 signup bonus is blaming DEI for why he can’t do the required 20 pushups.

MAGA is turning on Trump!

BREAKING: Donald Trump says his recent MRI was so perfect that the doctors want to see one more next week.

BREAKING: Last night Lindsey Graham reportedly had nightmares about his prophetic words that Trump would destroy the GOP.

BREAKING: Marjorie Taylor Greene reportedly can’t believe the jaguar would actually eat her face.

What a compliment from one of the worst members of Congress!

BREAKING: Ghislaine Maxwell now claims that the only times she ever saw Donald Trump at Epstein’s house he was reading the Bible, calling charities to donate money, or holding Melania’s hand.

BREAKING: Trump was so distraught and distracted about his exploding Epstein crisis that he accidentally put on green foundation makeup this morning instead of orange.

Now we know Bill Clinton was the "Vietnam" Trump was talking about when he said he didn't get any STDs.

BREAKING: Donald Trump is reportedly upset that Kai Trump finished last in her golf tournament, and didn't use any of the cheating tricks he taught her.

BREAKING: Sales of Trump flags nationwide have declined 96% this week.

BREAKING: Trump's order for the DOJ to probe Bill Clinton has BACKFIRED, as now a DOJ lawyer has subpoenaed Trump over Epstein's insinuation that Trump gave Clinton a blowjob, with the lawyer demanding photos of Trump's penis to look for matches in the unreleased Epstein files.

BREAKING: A group of farmers in Nebraska are competing with each other to build the tallest sculpture of Donald Trump from a mixture of manure and their unsold soybean crops to raise awareness on how Trump's tariffs have bankrupted their farms.

BREAKING: Chinese, North Korean, and Iranian officials have reportedly lifted their censorship bans on American media for the weekend so their citizens can watch Trump's downfall, and see what happens when decadent Western democracies are allowed to pick idiots for leaders.

BREAKING: A liberal billionaire is offering $25,000 to the first journalist who asks Trump to his face why one of Epstein's victims would write in an email, “I don’t want to come early to find Trump in your house.”

BREAKING: The Secret Service is reportedly deliberating on how to respond if Trump tries to go on a sudden one-way trip to Moscow, Riyadh, or Buenos Aires.

BREAKING: Donald Trump is reportedly thinking about doing the Weinstein move where he starts using a wheelchair to gain sympathy despite his sex crimes.

BREAKING: Donald Trump is reportedly beginning all the phone conversations he's having with Republican representatives and senators in which he tries to bribe or threaten them into not voting to release the Epstein Files by shouting, "You better not be recording this call!"

BREAKING: A “Pedophile Bonfire” event held tonight in a small Georgia town saw 73 Trump voters burn their MAGA hats.

BREAKING: MAGA insiders are worried so many Trump fans will take their money out of his crypto coins and short his Trump stock because of the exploding Epstein scandal that Trump will lose all his money.

BREAKING: The Nobel Committee says they will give the Peace Prize and its million dollar reward to the first Trump cabinet member who invokes the 25th Amendment.

BREAKING: A town that voted 89% for Donald Trump a year ago is holding a "Pedohile Bonfire" event in their public park tonight for anyone who wants to come burn their Trump flags and MAGA hats.

BREAKING: Optometrists in D.C. are offering Pam Bondi and Kash Patel free eye exams and a new pair of glasses after their claims that the Epstein Files did not incriminate Donald Trump have been proven totally false.

BREAKING: Donald Trump is reportedly livid after finding out a White House staffer has begun doing preliminary research on how previous administrations handled mid-term presidential successions.

BREAKING: White House staffers say Donald Trump is strategizing senators and representatives who will vote against revealing the Epstein Files for him “like Hitler strategizing imaginary German divisions in April of 1945.”

BREAKING: Donald Trump is reportedly raging over the number of Republicans in Congress who are flipping on the Epstein Files, and is complaining that "no one is loyal anymore."

BREAKING: Donald Trump is reportedly threatening his cabinet if they "even think about" using the 25th Amendment on him.

BREAKING: Dozens of towns across rural America are hosting giant “Pedophile Bonfires” this weekend to burn all their Trump flags and MAGA merch.

What if Republicans wrote the plots to these famous Disney films?

BREAKING: White House staffers say Donald Trump is giving off real "Jim Jones vibes" tonight.

BREAKING: The Secret Service says they will not allow Trump to make any sudden trips to Moscow.

JD Vance's couch is so getting fucked tonight...

BREAKING: White House lawyers are reportedly worried Lauren Boebert and Nancy Mace recorded their phone calls with Trump where he begged, bribed, threatened, and cried for them to reverse their votes on releasing the Epstein files.

BREAKING: Hillary Clinton reportedly thinks it's hilarious that the thing that will finally bring down Trump is emails.

BREAKING: Donald Trump reportedly caught JD Vance taking measurements in the Oval Office this morning after the new Epstein emails were released.

BREAKING: Fox News executives have reportedly called a "Code Red," which means the network will immediately launch their "War on Christmas" content to distract from the Trump-Epstein bombshells.

BREAKING: Donald Trump is reportedly asking his advisers if they think now is a bad time to finalize his pardon of Ghislaine Maxwell.

BREAKING: A televangelist in Oklahoma is defending Donald Trump’s likely inclusion in the Epstein Files by pointing out "there's plenty of rape, incest, and pedophilia in the Bible."

Trump turns everything and everyone around him ugly.

BREAKING: Teens reportedly keep using chalk to write “BEWARE THE MAR-A-LAGO MOLESTER!” all around the pool at Trump’s resort when he’s not there and security is much more relaxed.

BREAKING: A new poll found that 89% of Americans think Trump’s Oval Office is tacky and ugly.

BREAKING: Donald Trump’s doctors say that, if Congress publicly releases the Epstein files, the stress could give him a debilitating stroke.

BREAKING: GOP officials in red states are privately warning that the budget about to pass will soon result in their states having third-world standards of living with no healthcare subsidies, closed hospitals, rescinded renewable energy grants, and no more disaster relief.

BREAKING: RFK Jr. has reportedly convinced Donald Trump to stop taking his congestive heart failure medicine and instead use healing crystals that realign the body’s mitochondria.