But more to the point... I'm starving to death here. Do you know how long it's been since I've seen meaningful fresh IP in video games? God, there's been what... Penny's Big Breakaway and Freedom Planet? Maybe that Mina thing will turn out okay, but as a Dark Souls wannabe I don't have high hopes.

When I make video games, there's nostalgia involved, sure. Hey, I'm making my own real 8-bit games that work on real 8-bit systems! It's like I'm competing against the big names in the industry, circa, uh... 1983. (Look, it's not any MORE lame than Civil War re-enactors.)

The video game industry isn't an ouroboros... it's a human centipede, with the customer at the end of that cacaphageous conga line.

I'm getting to be quite the hardware wonk. Retro48k explores the PC Engine (our Turbografx-16) and the way it functions. 8-bit makes programming it easy... but a buttload of VRAM and 32 16-color palettes makes it capable of competing on 16-bit turf. www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngpq...

The Reflecting Pool is a perfect reflection of the president now! Pond scum!

It's too bad there's not more black representation in heavy metal. Living Colour rocks as hard as any white guy ever has.

Is there a way to get a REAL Documents folder on Windows 11, and not this cloud crap? Can I turn the cloud crap off? Or at least get real folders and not ones that exist only in the cloud?

Uh, wasn't Orbach Jewish...?

You put dumb in, you get dumb back, just as surely as the sun rises in the morning. It's been a saying in computer circles since the start of time... "Garbage in, garbage out." And stupid (especially willful stupidity) has never done anyone any good at any time.

Gosh, I wonder why the Reflecting Pool has algae in it now that you don't pay anyone to maintain it and keep it clean. It's a complete fucking mystery! We're at South Park adult levels stupid at this point. It's embarrassing. Critical thinking, motherfucker, can you comprehend it?

"My fellow Moronicans, after firing the ground staff that maintained it to save an inconsequential amount of money, the Reflecting Pool suddenly started to accumulate algae. We believe this is the fault of the Democrats." "Durrr, I knew it were them Demmycrats! Let's get 'em, Jethro!"

First good news I've heard in a while. As a billionaire, he still has too much.

The VIC-20 and furries. Oh yeah, now we've got a party!

From an advertisement in Commodore Power/Play magazine. That guy doesn't look familiar at all. (cough) (cough cough Mario cough)

Hey, looks like we did get that Waku Waku 7 sequel after all. Kinda. www.youtube.com/watch?v=qd4s...

I tend to have the same view of the Nintendo 64 as I do the V-Smile, and really, they did occupy similar markets. It was instantly the little kid console, for parents who didn't trust their kids with CDs or the more mature themes of Playstation games.

"Behold, TIMMY! Thou hast increased thy level of all thine adventurers! And you seem to have wet thine pants."

Of course Ogre Battle didn't move many copies on the Nintendo 64! One, it's an Enix game, so instant collectible obscurity there. Two, look at the Nintendo 64 audience. If you're too young to read, you're not playing a turn-based strategy game on the Pre-K Do 64.

Oh, Martin, you were so obsessed with the finer details of Ghouls 'n Ghosts ports, but how could you see anything with all that hair grease dripping into your eyes? I saw your caricature.

I wonder how progress is coming along on the Martin Alessi-approved arcade quality Genesis conversion of Ghouls 'n Ghosts?

I don't know that Bill Maher was on Epstein's island, but really, would it shock anyone to find out he was? He's the type... rich, entitled, wholly without restraint or morality. The chance that he was there, sticking himself into kinder along with Trump, is like... 1:1.

Of all the presidents who get a library, I guess Obama doesn't get to have one because Bill "Fuckface" Maher has a problem with it. Or Trump has a problem with it and knows Fuckface was also screwing kids on Epstein Island.

Here's your reminder (in case one was even necessary) that Bill Maher sucks balls. "Why does Obama need a presidential library, anyway?" I dunno, because some presidents actually know how to read?

An unofficial Battle City sequel? Okay, wasn't expecting that. www.youtube.com/watch?v=UShu...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zbv... Super Mario 64 for Game Boy Advance. Okay, sure. When do I wake up?

Spectrum is just an annoying format to me. When was it released, 1983? Both the NES and ColecoVision were superior game formats, yet the Spectrum had hojillion games. And even Clive didn't want it to PLAY games, if Micro Men was any indication.

Intellivision isn't a total loss. It's got what, eight pseudo-sprites? Spectrum doesn't have any way to put characters over backgrounds without destroying the backgrounds; it's all just one big layer. Seems to have better scrolling than Coleco, too.

I thought about making an Intellivision game. Lots of reasons I didn't, and the graphics chip is near the top of the list. Spectrum can at least offset its low color output with a high resolution. The Intellivision has the total anti-package... low color and shitty resolution.

Color clash and I don't hang. I mean, I can DO it, and I muddled through with five ColecoVision games, but it sucks. It probably sucks as much on the NES, and sucks a whoooooole lot more on Intellivision and ZX Spectrum, where only two colors can exist inside a tile.

I acclimate so well to Master System pixel art because it's very similar to the way it's made on computers with EGA graphics. You have sixteen colors. Those are the colors you get. However, all colors can freely mingle. SMS offers that freedom, and grants an addition 16 colors for sprites.

Me in 1993: "Man, Eternal Champions looks like ass! Dithering sucks!" Me now, on Master System: "Welp, time to drop the stippling on this picture! Yes, we'll just call it 'stippling.'"

Continued improvements on this guy.

Need to get groceries. Don't want to get groceries. It's hot and my car is old. Should, though.

Why oh why did this have to be so difficult to convert and upload? Just, senseless. Anyway, a little somethin' somethin' for the Master System's 40th anniversary.

Geez, VLC. Could you suck any more at video conversion?

Doing pixel art again. Let's see if anyone recognizes themselves...

Man, it's hotter than the seventh seal of Satan's sweaty sphincter in here.

It's a fucking joke. It's like the whole world has surrendered to stupid. I used to be the laziest man in the room, and somehow AI has almost made my work ethic shine by comparison.

Look at me, I'm a master chef! (throws a Lean Cuisine in the microwave) Are you fine with three minutes, or do you want to be daring and leave it in there for three and a half minutes? I'm just that versatile!

Will I try it anyway? Maybe. I'm just annoyed that people are having computers program computers for them. No no no, that's your job! In what way is the game yours if you hand it over to AI? If you need things easy, use BASIC. If you need things easier than that, use object-oriented programming.

"Someone's making a Xevious port for the Sega Genesis!" Okay, awesome! I'd be down for that. "And it's being made with AI." Ugh. Maybe I'll just wait for a human-engineered Terra Cresta.

I have to say, Chun Li aged pretty gracefully, if Street Fighter 6 was any indication.

"But I've got to have the latest and greatest-" You don't. You're FOMO at the mouth, but you'd be a lot healthier and happier if you took the rabies shot that is thriftiness. Especially now in 2026, even cheap tech can do a lot. I got by with last generation systems in 1983. You'll get by, too.

I've been dedicated to video games since I was a kid and could barely afford anything. I got by with rentals, garage sale finds, and DIY game development. There will always, always be ways to play video games that won't drill you for every dime.

But really, guys, do you really need to throw a thou at a custom PC? The world's on fire, you've got a bazillion ways to play video games already, and if you're a certain age like myself, you don't have too many console generations LEFT. I can't even BEGIN to give a shit about this.

The Steam Machine is way too expensive to live inside my head. Oh no!

Heh, turns out the NES needs "magic sprites" too. The eyes of Rebecca and Molly are made from them. (And also Molly's muzzle, I think.)

"Enter the octagon." Ugh, if it's UFC, it's more like enter the big dumb oxes and goons.

"It provides a humanitarian service. It will let no human being watch Designing Women."

Just to let all of you know! Sledge Hammer! by @alanspencer.bsky.social is available on Fandango at Home. It's only fifteen dollars for both seasons, and it's still clever, in ways I hadn't realized when I saw it as a kid. I'm still partial to the very MAD magazine-like Hammeroid episode.