if you make your wife happy, you’re good. if you make her dad happy, you’re a legend.

i used to bully this guy back in high school for being gay but i learned that a hole is a hole since then. flash forward to me getting on grindr & him messaging me to come cuck him & his bf. his bf had a nice ass so i went for it. i’m not a mean guy anymore but damn if he doesn’t make it easy.

dad always said to have one gay friend in the friend group. but what if there’s two bi guys? they make a whole gay right?

when both of my friends are acting bitcher than me & i provide a simple solution.

one on one’s with coach

my daughter is my princess but her bf is my little slut.

my bf is a slut & i knew that beforehand. that’s what i love about him most though. a guy catches us in the garage & buddy asks if he could join. my bf got to his knees before i could answer.

when my son in law & i decide to stay at the cabin & send the girls off shopping.

i love hanging around my brother in law when he gets drunk. he makes sure i eat, make it home safe & makes sure i’m gonna sleep good.

nobody knows how close my step bro & i really are

spending time with my gf’s dad

whenever my stepdad comes home drunk, he stops by my room first to make sure “i’m ok.” i tell him no anyway just cause i know what he’s gonna do to make it better.

we always tell the families in the cul de sac that they were free to use the pool, just let my husband or i know in advance. sometimes the family comes, sometimes the dads come to “swim alone.”

with my wife upstairs sleep, drunk from date night, i knew instantly wasn’t getting any. my son’s best friend on the other hand was wide awake in the living room. i always knew there was a reason those two slept i. the same bed.

went out drinking with my best friend & my little bro. when we got back to the house, i go off to go piss. come back & my little bro is pounding the shit out of my best friend.

“close the door chump. you were off work & had dad all day. it’s my turn now.”

i love when my bf’s roommate is single, more dick for me!

dad always help me unwind & unload when i get off of work.

when you & your professor find a way to discuss your grades

i don’t speak on the things i did to get into my frat my sophomore year of college, but let’s just say i took on a lot of work to get my family where we are now with my connections.

my sister’s bf swears he’s straight, but i already see through that. my point was proven when i told him to come take a few shots with me & he had on a thong.

man, i’m always horny. if it’s not my girl, then it’s her brother. somebody’s catching this load.

having a gay brother, i knew instantly when my gf’s gay uncle started flirting with me at her family dinner. he waited until we got alone & asked if i’ve ever been with a guy. told him he’d have to ask his nephew. i was digging in his hole the next day.

a real boss knows what team bonding looks like

my son reminds me of myself back in my college years. i always wondered what it would like like from the other pov.

dad & son bonding

i only have one rule in my house. any hole that stays overnight gets used, that includes my big bro when his wife kicks him out.

to my sister, he’s a man’s man. to me, he’s been a bitch since high school.

i just got some new neighbors, a cute new family. i invited the dad over for a few beers & the next thing i know, i’m ass up waiting for him to get me pregnant next.

caught dad cheating again, but this time i said i was going to tell ma. he begged me not to & offered everything he could think of to keep my mouth shut. guess what i went with.

what’s the point of having a f@g as a stepson if you can’t use him like his friends do?