When you escape abuse, it's ok to miss them, grieve the loss of the relationship, or love them, even though they harmed you. Feelings aren't logical - they just are. Healing comes from acknowledging them, processing them & letting them pass without judgment. 💛 #HealingJourney

Coercive control doesn’t start with violence—it starts with erosion. Of confidence. Of identity. Of worth. #PsychologicalAbuse #CoerciveControl

Abuse doesn’t stop at the victim. Children absorb the fear, the control, the silencing. It shapes their emotional development, beliefs, and sense of safety. #DomesticAbuseAwareness

People don’t often realize that abusers don’t always appear “mean” or “aggressive” at first. They can be charming, thoughtful, even loving—until they’re not. Don’t blame yourself for not seeing the warning signs. #EmotionalAbuse

In #ControllingRelationships, abusers often try to sabotage their partners’ careers and educational aspirations, trapping them in dependence and isolation. Survivors share their experiences. shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Coercive control is made of rules, restrictions, and fear—designed to keep you small, silent, and under control. #CoerciveControl

A relationship involving a perpetrator of #coercivecontrol usually begins with love bombing, but that romance often turns into manipulation, isolation, and abuse. This is Sheila's story. shadowsofcontrol.com/video/...

Healthy relationships are built on trust, not control. ⚠️

Responding to an angry outburst from my abusive husband (now ex) was a lose-lose situation. If I reacted with anger, no matter how mildly, he would tell me I was crazy, insane, or unbalanced. 1/2

It’s a myth that someone can be a “good parent” while being abusive to their partner. By default, an abusive partner is an abusive parent. Someone needs to get that memo to the family courts. #DomesticAbuse #FamilyCourt

Coercive control is invisible abuse, stripping away freedom piece by piece. Survivors describe how silence, subtle punishments & relentless pressure grind them down until saying “yes” feels like the only way to survive. What looks like choice from the outside is, in reality, captivity in disguise.

"Why did you stay?" is the wrong question to ask domestic abuse survivors. Start asking, "How were you prevented from leaving?"

Coercive control teaches you that the cost of resistance is greater than the cost of obedience. 💔

The echoes of abuse don’t stop when you leave. Healing means unlearning the lies you were taught to believe. #SurvivorHealing #PsychologicalAbuse

Verbal abuse is psychological warfare. It rewires your self-image and replaces it with their version of you. #VerbalAbuse #DomesticAbuseAwareness

A victim of domestic abuse will begin to shrink & organize their life around their partner’s demands to avoid harm. This behavior increases dependency, as meeting their needs & keeping them at the center feels necessary to minimize the risk of further abuse. #CoerciveControl

Learn about the insidious tactics of systems abuse and how abusers exploit legal, bureaucratic, and institutional structures to control their victims. #PostSeparationAbuse shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Verbal abuse doesn’t just hurt in the moment—it rewires your inner voice. Survivors often carry their abuser’s words long after they leave. #EmotionalAbuse

By using carefully crafted words and phrases, gaslighters distort your perception of events and shift responsibility for their actions, making you question your own feelings, memory, and worth. #Gaslighting shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Some abusers demand constant validation, needing reassurance of their importance but rarely offering it in return. This one-sided dynamic reinforces control, leaving their partner unappreciated & emotionally drained. #EmotionalAbuse

When abusers reach out after you've left, every word is a calculated hook designed to pull you back. This article dissects a real letter from an abuser - my abuser - exposing the methods they use to destabilise you.

Medical neglect is a hidden form of abuse where an abuser deliberately withholds care, medication, or support to control their partner. Survivors report being denied treatment, forced to manage illness alone, or prevented from accessing essential medical resources. shadowsofcontrol.substack.c...

This is love bombing. Abusers often shift tactics when they sense they’re losing control. It’s not love—it’s manipulation. #CoerciveControl #DomesticAbuseAwareness

Controlling partners often use relentless criticism to undermine your self-esteem, targeting your appearance, intelligence, or habits. It can make you feel like nothing you do is enough. But their words reflect them, not you. Your worth isn’t defined by their criticism.

Moving the goalposts is a manipulation tactic used to erode self-esteem and ensure you never feel good enough. #PsychologicalAbuse

Emotional abuse manipulates feelings to create guilt and unworthiness, while psychological abuse distorts perception to destabilize a victim’s sense of reality. Learning to identify these behaviors is key to breaking free from their control. #AbuseAwareness shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Entitled individuals often demand excessive amounts of your time and energy, disregarding your own needs and #boundaries. This selfish behavior can drain you emotionally and physically. Prioritize your own well-being and set clear boundaries to protect your energy.

A hallmark of #coercivecontrol is the micromanagement of daily life —rigid rules, restrictions, and expectations enforced to control a partner's actions, thoughts, and personal freedom. shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

The belief that a partner or child can be owned is at the core of abuse. It explains the constant control, the seething jealousy, the silencing of individuality, and the dangerous rage when ownership is challenged.

This is what coercive control looks like: domination over every part of your life, until you’re a stranger in your own skin. #CoerciveControl

Weaponized incompetence is a control tactic seen in coercively controlling relationship in which one partner feigns inability to avoid responsibility and shift the balance of power. #emotionalabuse shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Abusers don’t want you to grow—they want to control your growth. The moment you reclaim your power, they feel threatened. #EmotionalAbuse

Anna Pinkerton believed she'd found her soulmate, only to have him slowly strip away her confidence and steal precious time from her life and children. She shares her story of breaking free. #coercivecontrol shadowsofcontrol.com/video/...

Abusive relationships demand forced sacrifices, stripping victims of careers, education, hobbies, relationships, health, and even their sense of self, all to satisfy the abuser’s need for control. shadowsofcontrol.substack.c...

Abusers will often try to portray their former partners as mentally unstable. This is a way for them to maintain the upper hand over you or manipulate legal systems to their own ends, such as custody battles. It also enables them to feel better about the fact that you have left them. #Gaslighting

Abusers often frame their control as “helping” or “protecting” you. They’ll convince you that decisions they make—about your job, friends, or hobbies—are for your own good. It sounds thoughtful, but it’s really a way to keep you dependent and under their control.

Isolation is a common tactic in abusive relationships. The abuser cuts you off from your support network to make you easier to control. #CoerciveControl #EmotionalAbuse

Abusers idealize you, then devalue and destroy you. That shift is not your fault—it’s a manipulation pattern. #DomesticAbuseAwareness

When affection is withheld as a means of control, it can have a lasting emotional impact. Learn how abusers manipulate warmth and intimacy to create dependency and maintain power. #EmotionalAbuse shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Sabotage is a common tactic of control. Abusers often time their cruelty to damage your confidence, career, and independence. #CoerciveControl #EmotionalAbuse

Terah seemed to have it all: a successful career, businesses, and a beautiful family. But hidden beneath, she endured a nightmare of control. Now, she shares her journey of escaping and healing from #narcissisticabuse. shadowsofcontrol.com/video/...

You deserve a love that feels like home, not a battlefield. 💘

Leaving an abusive relationship doesn’t always bring relief. Survivors often experience deep grief, mourning the relationship they thought they had, the time and opportunities lost, and even the version of themselves that suffered. #DomesticAbuse #SurvivorVoices shadowsofcontrol.substack.c...

Abusers with public admiration often use it to silence their victims. It becomes a shield that protects them, not you. #DomesticAbuseAwareness

Abusers frequently start arguments to provoke conflict. They enjoy creating tension and keeping you on edge. 🚩

Constant surveillance and accusations are warning signs of coercive control. #ControllingBehavior #CoerciveControl

Rina shares how she took back control from her narcissistic ex by setting firm boundaries that prioritized her peace and well-being. #Boundaries shadowsofcontrol.com/storie...

Abusers often shift blame onto you, claiming their actions are a reaction to your behavior. They might accuse you of provoking them or making them angry, thereby justifying their abuse. Abuse is never the victim's fault! ✋#DomesticAbuseAwareness

Substance use coercion is a hidden form of abuse that manipulates and controls victims through addiction, dependency, and fear. #CoerciveControl shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...