Even though I'm facing these problems with depression, I see them as a side effect of having climbed out of the rock bottom, because when the fall occurs, it tends to be higher and more intense. As long as I continue to reward myself for each step I take to get out of this, I can do it.

On the bright side, I continued a commission I was stuck with, and it's turning out much better than I expected. The problem wasn't the practices, it was my mental health.

I saw my cat in a dream. I woke up so depressed. Every day is a struggle to get things done and try not to think that it seems like no effort I make is worth it, that everything just seems to get worse. But I'm trying.

first attempt to listen to this. I started crying within the first few minutes. failed. maybe next time www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJWk...

I wasn't the only one who had that impression when I saw Noodle's transition scene. But some people are saying this is problematic because people were assuming the character was a boy because he doesn't have breasts (?). I thought of it because I thought the character at the beginning was Mowgli

I know it might just be an aesthetic effect referencing Mowgli, who for some reason became Noodle, but even so, it was a brilliant way to represent a transition

Watching the new Gorillaz animation. did They do a boy turning into Noodle? did i see what i think i saw? :O

lunch break, time to finish this

I need to figure out how to deal with the hottest part of the day. Depending on the day, this varies between 4 and 6 hours of infernal heat that prevents me from working. I need to think of a work schedule that doesn't coincide with this infernal period. I also have to do the same for bedtime.

This one is kind of hard to explain. If you have a very thin or translucent line that divides two areas with different colors, to create a more defined border, pick the darker color between the two areas and paint underneath the line. It seems obvious, but it's easy to forget over time.

just had one of these again while drawing

the urge to animate Dasi dancing to this song www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Yoc...

practice: drawing what i see on the internet + detailing circle #1 this is how this practice works: i put a circle in the sketch and everything closer to the center of the circle will be very detailed. The further away or outside the circle, the less detailed I draw

Sometimes I see some drawings that makes me think I'm overdoing it with my drawings, in terms of quality. Not that I want to make my drawings look bad on purpose, but I think I'm focusing so much on making the drawing look good that it ends up losing what it's really trying to express.

practice: drawing what i see on the internet #71

practice: drawing what i see on the internet #70

back to doing the "drawing what i see on the internet" practice

Actually, I'm happy. My brain is so immersed in the drawing that it's allowing me to develop my ideas better. What used to be a nightmare like having to control bad thoughts and the feeling of being rushed is now gradually returning to just being creative. I also have an idea for a dialog

after two hours trying to draw a face, my brain comes up with an even better idea to draw the face. I don't know if I should be happy or mad

I don't have much motivation to post horny thoughts here because my posts are shown to completely random strangers outside the nsfw community, and I can't make my account private. I also don't feel like looking at my feed here because for every piece of art I see, I see 10 doomposting stuff

Who would have thought that eating chocolate in a specific way would help me draw better? this is still very unexpected to me.

There's an 8 month difference between the two drawings. I'm always paranoid that someone will eventually think it's not the same person drawing. My style changes faster than an ice pop on a hot day.

I don't remember saving this image. I must have done it when I was drunk.

finally. free time to finish this

I think her personality is somewhat similar to Dasi's. When I was drawing her and listening to Japanese eurobeat, I imagined them doing choreography to the songs. it was cute

futa sans pussy.... dude she's a trans girl

as i expected, last art not doing numbers on twitter and bsky but doing very well on r34, the algorithmless website. That's why I trust uploading my drawings there and analyzing the quality based on the upvotes. This way, my analysis is more accurate in determining the quality of my drawings.

finished the drawing. waiting for the commissioner approval so it can be posted

I ended up drinking beer and eating pizza yesterday and passed out right after. I'm impressed I didn't get a hangover.

had to go through my old videos to delete some stuff. it was painful. I didn't delete everything. I don't want my cat to just be in my memory, but I don't want to have videos that remind me of her last days. I still feel very guilty for not being able to save her from this disease.

Something I liked about drawing my two OCs side-by-side is that I unintentionally made them in a different proportion. Legs longer than their torsos, like Sailor Moon characters. Maybe I'll adopt this style for SFW drawings.

After I finish the drawing I'm working on, I'll finish Zoid design

I don't know if someone finds another person's face so funny and unique that it makes them attractive, but that's what happened with Dasi.

I remember when I had to draw these and it was a total nightmare

I'll never understand why drawing a pair of piercings on the taint is so hard

It's been a funny experience. When I start to get stressed or want to stop drawing, I remember the chocolate I'll eat after an hour of drawing, and I go "mmmm chocolate 🤤" and keep drawing without feeling stressed.

Almost 4 hours of drawing. I'm almost eating my fourth chocolate. No signs of stress, no itching, just a few minutes of depression. Almost finishing the drawing. My problem is a complete lack of dopamine.

my feed here makes me feel like i'm looking at porn at a university's library

I'm drawing the same OC for a second comm and I'm using the drawing of her I did 8 months ago to compare the quality. I still don't understand how I've improved. It feels like I haven't learned anything during all this time. You'll see when I post it probably tomorrow

Sometimes we need to stop trying to keep alive certain things because of nostalgia and let them die so they can be eventually revived in future generations, in a completely different world.

I finally got to buy some chocolate candies. Time to start rewiring the pleasure wires in my brain by associating each candy with an hour of drawing

i'm not seeing trans women cosplaying Kirara. That's making me want to draw Dasi cosplaying as Kirara before I draw her.

I lay down on the bed and kept doodling until I fell asleep. I woke up twice during the night and kept doing it to fall asleep again.

This works, but the problem is that after a while I end up depressed. Why can't I just stay in a neutral state while I'm drawing?