Are you in a headspace to recieve an interactive visual novel right now

at the function huffing hydrocarbons unknown to medical science in an attempt to kill enough brain cells that big bang theory big bang theory becomes funny to me

catching another autistic friend's vocal stim like its an std

Can't even say 'good girl' when petting an actual dog anymore without sounding like a pervert I hate the internet sometimes

drinking 8 beers and then searching "huge sword" on ebay

got a tummy ache just farted so loud my cat looked afraid for my wellbeing

wyd if you go on a date to a karaoke bar and they do a hamilton song

she zyrtec on my histamine till I stop sneezing

damn, grey's anatomy is pretty good, maybe women are onto something here

*dehydrated, no breakfast, 4 hours of sleep, 3 coffees.* "Idk what it is, I just feel a little off today"

Putting this on my battle jacket before pulling up to the local basement grindcore and powerviolence shows

got so homesick I literally just googled "Arcata, CA" and started scrolling through google images. A photo showed up of the street I used to live on and I started sobbing.

whole family of asian tourists who don't seem to speak english just walked into the gay bar. The dad is looking around like

perry the platypus and dr doofenshmirtz toxic yaoi

putting swlf esteem by the offspring as my anthem on tinder

blinking straight technology off the dhgate yartjamin before I clock in for my 12 hour shift at the pain and suffering factory

buying some of this before civil unrest breaks out so I can do warzone photojournalism on it

I think ghost does a lot for the public image of satanism by being so corny that it's impossible to claim that they're evil with a straight face

Being a stem major is weird because I feel the same wave of nostalgia for texas instruments graphing calculators that I feel for my gameboy color, but I have to remember that they also make missile guidance systems

women will be like "I find it really triggering when you lie, say mean things, and invalidate my emotions, I would prefer if you didn't do that" and men will be like "damn, this bitch crazy, always blowing up for no reason."

twilight satisfies teenage girls' innate desire for an emotionally stunted, significantly older boyfriend

took my girl to fivebelow off the anesthesia to get sanrio plushies becsuse she was very brave at the dentist

edward cullen be like "technically the term is ephebophile"

Republican cosmic horror about the incomprehensible elder gods that control the forces of the universe (basic sociology and economy textbooks)

every time I hear straight people talking about anal, I feel like I'm watching the SAW 2 needle pit scene

super surreal feeling holding $1500 cash, feeling like it's a lot of money, and then realizing it wouldn't come close to covering a month's rent on a 2 bedroom apartment in my city

Scrolling through Instagram commenting "would" under everyone's mothers day posts

Committing an armed robbery in this hoodie

Identifying which social media rabithole psyop strangers have been consumed by based on their grocery store carts

gas station I just stopped at is remarkably robbable

not now honey, mommy is gigafried off that skrong

Homosexuality is unnatural? Then why do men have prostate problems if they don't get fucked in the ass enough?

today I will contract legionnaires disease due to reduced health and safety regulations to own the libs

Why does this shot look straight out of a Scorsese movie

Just got some 🔥🔥🔥 in the mail

I love finding bobby pins and hair clips around my room. An angel shed some feathers here.

My dad works from home and I have calculated that he makes about 60k a year from hours spent playing fortnite. I love that for him so much

getting road rage at a traffic jam and screaming "fucking idiot," not at the driver in front of me, but at the civil engineer who designed such a dogshit intersection

just seen an old man absolutely going to town on a burger while the default iPhone ringtone blared out of his pocket. not even the slightest reaction to it. I aspire to that level of peace

I really miss music made by white boys on heroin

Why do people making plans to wheatpaste and feed the homeless have better opsec than the US executive branch

Donald Trump d*es, and then everyone in Washington DC gets together to sing No One Mourns The Wicked. Hillary clinton comes down in a hellicopter and starts telling everyone about their whimsical adventures in boarding school together

Being a tattoo artist is so weird sometimes. Why am I shaving the homie's pubes at 11am

Angel numbers 🥰😍💖

Daily affirmations: -I am going to die -Nothing will ever fill that hole inside me -I cannot drink enough to ease the pain -I will never be good enough -I will lose everything I love -Fuck it, we ball (this is completely unironic, I am a buddhist)

While my partner is at work all day, I do the important task of foraging for the best instagram reels to fill her inbox

Just saw a middle aged couple hit one of these in the cheese aisle at the grocery store

I judge the hell out of people's purchases when I'm in line at the grocery store

The frontal lobe thing is so real I turned 25 and all of a sudden I like wine and radiohead sounds good to me

ur in her dms I'm in her chess. com inbox