Nick Pope obviously follows me

Can’t believe Kim Kardashian failed the bar exam just days after announcing the moon landing was fake.

Goalkeepers are going to have to realize if Haaland gets played 1v1 over the top they have to come out and try to tackle him no matter how much space there is because he does not miss 1v1 but he’s not a great lateral dribbler.

Can Liverpool play Crystal Palace every week?

Arsenal fans have it rough right now. We have to argue amongst ourselves which of our 2 CBs is the best in the world.

This is why you don't leave the fate of a nation to a simple majority referendum vote with zero details of what the actual outcome will be.

Liz Truss lasted longer than Ange

I was in a flight one time with a guy I swore was Robert Peston and then when we disembarked I realized was actually Jarvis Cocker.

It was important for Arsenal this summer to do business early & get as many players in prior to the season starting, especially with the difficult fixture list early on. That does mean that clubs now know we have no choice but to move players on, and probably lower fees, but we have to accept that.

Max Dowman was born after the first set of Man City’s 115 charges

If the Saints win 4 games this year it will be an accomplishment so celebrate all four

I’m convinced this dude has done 8m in training and is just drip feeding us for the next 5-10 years.

I’m available next weekend

Sometimes I think about what moving back to America would be like and then I see something on Facebook like “what is the best belt to carry your gun while going for a run” and that ends quickly.

Did we sign a striker yet

Every note Rod Stewart sings in this set is somehow an F

Sometimes the headline nails it and you don’t even need to read the story

Don’t think Katie McCabe ever made it home last night

Football is a funny thing, Arsenal women gave up 5 goals to Aston Villa, 4 to Brighton, 3 to Man United, then got a clean sheet against the best team in the world. Only one of those games really mattered and they did it in the right one.

Stadium of Light is by far the coolest name for a stadium, sounds like something hand built by an ancient civilization. Sunderland took the long way back to the Prem but they did it.

The 80-year recipe stoking America’s Prosperity: 1) Free-market capital investments in brilliant ideas… 2) enabled by Engineering Innovations… 3) based on Science Research in Universities… 4) funded by Grants from the US Government. It’s time more people understood this.

Former Hale Ender Dan Ballard with an incredible header there

If anyone would like to give me a $400m plane with no strings attached feel free to reply

I'd like to pretend I'm shocked the Saka chokehold was not called but after seeing Tomiyasu's face stepped on without any consequences I am not surprised by anything anymore.

So many Arsenal shirts all around London today and all the pubs are packed. Huge huge match tonight.

Barca will get through but looked more vulnerable today. This is anyone’s CL.

Emi Martinez likes to big up himself as a World Cup winner and fair enough to him but if he’d made a couple of saves he should make Villa would be in the CL semis.

Villa were better in the first half but PSG had the luck. Not so much in the second half so far.

Arsenal defensive formation for next week

Hey we got the minimum at least

If that’s not red what is

All my friends are voting no on all of the amendments so I expect they’ll all pass

Penalties are already too easy, we don’t need to give the takers even more advantage

Was Bloc Party British Interpol? Was Interpol American Bloc Party? Historians will disagree

My IRA sure isn’t

Liverpool been dominated by PSG all night but PSG haven’t been able to put one in the net, they put Harvey Elliot on for Salah who has had a real stinker, and he scores in less than a minute

They should make penalty takers start within the box and once they start to move they have to move forward.

Katie McCabe only scores bangers Keeper thought there was no way she was going for goal

I thought getting caught taking upgrades on Turkish airlines was a weak way to go down but could you imagine violating ethics rules for *spurs tickets*

Why are people obsessed with Lewis-Skelly getting moved to midfield? Let him do his thing where he is, it's working out quite well for everyone.

Weird how delaying the restart isn’t a problem anymore

Not sure any of the options are good but we do need to try something else up front and hope we accidentally find something functional.

The most entertaining part of a Trump presidency is the endless online fan fiction. People on both sides, clueless about what’s actually happening, completely making stuff up as if they’re facts only for others to eagerly consume and share whatever aligns with their confirmation bias.

How will we know when America is great again? Will there be a push notification or something?

I’m in New Orleans today but I’m leaving this evening, which is perfect because I get to be here for all the snow jokes and not the actual snow.

When you shoot from the left post and put it out for a goal kick to the opposite side of the pitch you’ve really done something special.

Ethan!

Let’s do this Fulham and Leicester

Sometimes I am glad I slept through the Saints game, and this is definitely one of those times.

Another ridiculous handball penalty, completely unintentional and inconsequential to the passage of play