Don't even talk to me right now man

Guys I stubbed my toe and I'm folding inwards help

Every day I wake up and curse the wicked green bitch who made me able to speak fluent English

Help!

Someone sealed me in my little hiding hole. Does anyone know if a doordasher will follow the instructions "please smash a big rock on top until it breaks im stuck"

who the fuck is Fourtha Julie

I'm hiding in my tiny ground hole there's loud boom noises every few seconds and flashes of light I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHERE IS IT COMING FROM

Jinjos are dropping like flies because that shitass bear won't stop fucking around

I heard they flushed a rainbow down the toilet yesterday. Tragic

Guess who just beat up a coin machine! Not me it was Banjo again sorry

Jinjo diets consist of many things but I can't tell if we're herbivores or carnivores. Not because I don't know, but because Rare banned us from revealing it due to "children crying" or whatever

Help!

I wanna be shredded up into confetti and put back together for science

Help!

Some days I wake up and beg the gods to tell me why we were created

I remeber back when we used to be 2d. It was never seen by the public eye but banjo kazooie 2d was real

I was trampled into an orange pulp today

Kane Parsons is rumored to be the only director to ever be replaced by a Jinjo. He is 20 jiggies old.

Who the fuck shot me with a horse tranquilizer and knocked me out cold for days? I missed my sandwich appointment

Oh boy! I've been invited over to Banjo's house for sandwiches! I'm heading over right now!

Someone parked a red toyota corolla next to my designated hiding spot. What the fuck.

Someone handed Banjo a striped flag with a bear paw on it today. I don't think any of us know what it means

Wtf I blinked and now I'm this? Okay, that's chill

Help? Actually don't. This is better. I know what it means. Fuck you. Actually nevermind, you're alright.

Sometimes when I lay down I look at the stars and wonder what happens happens to jinjos who don't get found

Some dude put a shock collar on me so I can't swear. What a fucki-OW

*whistles*

Some are wondering how jinjos piss if jinjo penis isn't real and jinjo pussy isn't either. The answer may shock you, you see we

BANJO YOU DUMBASS BITCH HURRY UP AND HELP ME I CANT FEEL MY LEGS OH GOD

Some sick fuck told the ant colony I had a limitless supply of marmalade and now they won't leave my spot. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get into a situation? To find the best spot to get stuck in?

Sometimes when I dream I'm like not orange. Like a color of jinjo never seen before. It's horrifying

Phew false alarm guys haha sorry

ALL JINJOS ARE IN HIDING GRUNTILDA'S HUNGER FOR JINJOS IS OUT OF CONTROL IM SO SCARED PLEASE HIDE

IT BURNS FUCK OH MY GOD WHYYYY

Help!

Gruntilda once cursed me to crave jinjo flesh for 6 hours. I can't tell you if I managed to resist or not

Help!

The fucking guy just sleepwalked to the river, washed away the blood, and sleepwalked back to his home. Nobody will ever believe that sleeping Banjo is a cold-blooded killer

I saw banjo maul some poor jinjo one time while he was sleepwalking

I discovered I could speak freely when I stubbed my toe and yelled FUCK

Help!

Jinjos have a secret you with never be allowed to know

*whistles*

Help!

If I get put into another situation I will personally find and kill whoever created this forsaken land

Sometimes I miss when I could only say two words and whistle

it's okay I escaped when she went to kidnap some weird bear girl

IT BURNS FUCK OH MY GOD WHYYYY

I had to escape on my own, that banjo motherfucker is an asshole he looked me dead in the eyes and swam away. Luckily jinjos can regrow limbs so I'll have my legs back in a week

FUCKING HELL HURRY UP AND HELP ME IM FUCKING DYING