The straight people were out for the fireworks again tonight - Bless the unconscious man for clearing enough room for me to finally get on the subway. I hope someone finally responded to the emergency alert. He wasn't even the one who bled on me!

I wish I was big and thicc. And if I was, I would say "Now I am big and thicc. Good." Idk I'll figure the rest out when I get there.

He has a hard life

Last night in the woods I think I saw a Mothman or maybe a Termina Moon (At Tonga Lumina)

I wonder if there's anybody in the world called Penelope, but it's pronounced "Peen-loap" and they're super tired of people saying it wrong

Montréal has something going on all the time.

There's a fireworks show so the gay village is full of straight people saying World Cup things and having babies and one of the babies looked at me.

My dog wasn't eating yesterday but this morning he's doing the "I'll eat but only if you're watching" thing. He's adorable but I am also late for work 💖

I wish I could trade episodes of From for more episodes of Widow's Bay

Ugh another day of lifeslop

Babe I'm at the store you want some of that Super Crack?

How do I befriend these crows without seeming too desperate?

That was some good-ass sleep I tell you what

Ugh people bothering me in stores to hawk a loyalty program when I'm CLEARLY in the MIDDLE of lip syncing to Golden

I just found Alyson Hannigan's crafting content on Facebook and it makes me so happy, so I thought I'd share it www.facebook.com/share/r/1BRE...

As a millennial I was misled by the media into believing that if I went into my basement and attacked rats with sticks I would eventually become wildly strong and maybe learn fire magic. I'm not getting that time back.

In Marvel Rivals Cyclops can use his optic blasts to propel himself backwards and I think that's hilarious - The opposite force should be pressing on his eyeballs. It would probably just break his neck and then his head would flop around blasting everything like a kinetic fire hose.

If you go to where the rainbow ends you find a bombed-out KFC. HAPPY PRIMMUTH

Aw, my dad just told me my tarantula Mrs. Perkins passed away. She was at least 24 years old. I'll always remember her for how she occasionally moved. 🥲

Had a great weekend with these two gents at the Dead by Daylight 10th anniversary event! @hauntedcosplay.bsky.social @rottenartist.bsky.social

Me: Ugh it's so oppressively hot today Also me: Time for a nice cup of tea

To the gnat that just rammed directly into my eyeball and is probably stuck in my skull somewhere now: I hope you know that I didn't want this

Thinking about how my British parents taught me to call flip flops "thongs" and then sent me out into the Canadian public school system. Child abuse?

About once a week I see an attractive person and I say in my head, "Hey handsomeface! Nice FACE! - Would it be funny if I said that out loud? No it'd be confusing and kind of hostile."

It's wild how 3 hours of jetlag can turn me into an absolute zombie, even days later

Do you think Skeletor's neck tapers down to the bone, or does the meat end abruptly like a ham hock?

My dad's gargantuan puds

Whimsler

Turned a corner on a trail in Whistler and saw a black bear a stone's throw away

Omters

Eating at Fuwa Fuwa because of course I had to. It's fricken good too~ Fwafwafwa~

I'm an Astronaut! Just like Katy Perry! (Boat tour from Granville Island to Granite Falls)

At the aquarium if you give them $10 they'll stuff one of the fish with ice cream and let you eat it so that's neat

I'm in the haircare aisle - I'm in the philosophy aisle - I'm in the combination haircare and philosophy aisle

Fwafwafwafuwafuwa

Capilano Suspension Bridge - @dragulosa.bsky.social was so brave~

Otter balls!

Went to White Rock, saw the rock. It was all white.

Back in my hometown, Langley BC, visiting Toy Traders, which is the best.

I thought it would be nice to digitize all the notes my mum's been keeping about the family tree but now I'm drowning in 40 year old post it notes written in cursive help.

Airport times - Heading to Vancouver to visit my family

The cafeteria at work is playing Smell Yo Dick

Oh wow must be my lucky day - A 1-leafed clover!

@dragulosa.bsky.social and I have had a child in Tomodachi life. Oh no #Roy

I've just heard that my friend Jordan, mynameispatches, has passed away. He was a wonderful guy, and so loved. I'll miss him.

Product idea: A machine that does my workout for me

UGH I love my PLANTS so MUCH. I can't wait to see them GROW and THRIVE.

I admire the ambition of the ants that decided to build their nest in my rotating composter, but I daresay they are going to have a bad time.

Look at this dumb idiot. I love him.

I'm a skinny lil elf. I've been working SO hard for years to build up my muscle mass, but my arms and legs are just so thin by nature that they don't show it... But at least I get validation whenever someone by chance touches my chest and says "oh my god!" (Twice tonight! Teehee!)