Whatever else happens. Hope these guys are enjoying their day 👍

The anti abortion stuff will be coming along in due course. Bosh.

Guess which one of these was arrested today. The answer will astound you!

We can all sleep safe now, thank christ. Top work, lads 👍

"Chopping up Scott Tenorman's parents, and putting them in a chilli for him to eat, is all fun and games but I draw the line at Kristi Noem shooting puppies on ICE raids."

Got an email through saying 'it's time to think about this year's Christmas party'

When you've deleted a series of unconnected emails and can now settle down for a weekend of live football.

Rupert Lowe has spotted some more Middle Eastern men in a small boat.

Modern day conservatism be like "here's a picture of some bacon" [loud cheers]

1. Wrong'un does a wrong. 2. Wrong'un finds Jesus. 3. Shortly after, wrong'un also finds Hitler.

Happy 60th Birthday to JK Rowling

Something tells me this old fella was smiling down on the #Lionesses last night.

If it ever happens, the note will read something like this.

Wonder who this guy's supporting tonight.

Terrible from the Spanish players, can't even be bothered to sing their own national anthem 😡

Possibly the worst thing I've ever read, starts off bad and goes downhill from from there.

Cardboard Clarkson's face with a look look as though the soft toy shouldn't have offered him a platter of cold food.

Who stores UHT milk on the wall above their bed? What utter woke nonsense is this?

Seems fitting to listen to this youtu.be/PrZFscfJxXc?...

Seriously, Dubai chocolate needs to just fuck off now. It's getting ridiculous.

Last day of school, the kids want to watch a film and I suggested Return of the Jedi. "Yay, that's the one with Jabba the fat looking weirdo!"

Guy at the front of the queue keeps telling people not to bring up Epstein

Nothing beats the thrill of listening to the Prodigy while sorting your car insurance. Take that, Libs.

Stargate [1994]

More unflushable turd than Darcy.

What a lovely picture, hope he gets dysentery.

This is precisely what someone who isn't a paedophile would say.

You've got to admire the thought process behind putting a burger van on a birthday card. What a time to be alive.

For this year's twelfth celebrations, it's important to remember that it's hot out there folks, so always stay hydrated and check on others as well.

No it doesn't. It's Friday afternoon and the sun's shining, which I suppose would have more meaning if you had a job to go to.

"Fuck it, that'll do. The Tour comes by in 20 mins"

Watching some soothing TV to close the day

No one can know how hard it is to be homeless, even if you happen to a patron of a homeless charity, it seems.

"Can my mate come along? I know what happened last time but he's past the whole MechaHitler thing. Honestly, he's sound now" The mate...

Lee Hurst promising to flee to Argentina

Gregg Wallace after discovering he can now spend more time with his son

Giving an opinion on Teams and one by one a series of yellow hands get raised like your being judged by Simon Cowell and Amanda Holden.

These videos he's sharing are getting increasingly homo-erotic.

Aside from the obvious, can we also agree that 1-2 weeks off every 12-18 months is nowhere near enough to avoid burnout?

Nick Tyrone would pick the wrong end of a one-ended stick.

Now I see my four years at music college were totally wasted. 🙄 I wasn't alive when Mozart was at his peak, I'm not Austrian, and bloody hours spent perfecting my muscle memory for his piano concert No. 24 in C minor were for nothing, as he's not part of my cultural DNA. Ever felt a fool?

Yeah, because no one outside the UK will have ever heard of the self-styled 'biggest band in the world'

Decided to read about The Salt Path this morning

Today I saw two seagulls fighting over a Greggs bag, outside B&M

A friend just text saying they're now regularly going to church and would like to come by our house for a visit.

"Signing bombs to be dropped on civilians? No problem, here's your visa. Now if you don't mind there's an elderly priest holding a sign that needs arrested"

Yvette Cooper looking at this and thinking 'I can't tell the difference between you and ISIS'

This reads like she's been getting bombarded with insurance scams, hope it didn't affect her game.

Satire remains firmly dead

That face up front is a cry for help