It's kind of amazing that the Supreme Court used the power of judicial review to grant itself the power of judicial review and everyone just went along with it for 200+ years.

There should be more scams disguised as school forms. I will sign literally any piece of paper, sight unseen, if one of my kids takes it out of a folder and hands it to me.

They don't give you a discount if you finish the marathon faster. Sawe should have taken his time and gotten gotten his money's worth.

Maybe next time.

Who the fuck is Hasan Piker? Wrong answers only.

Vontae Mack no matter what!

Somehow, "Somehow, Palpatine returned," returned.

I was a lot more inclined to see Avengers Endgame in the theater again UNTIL I heard there's new footage to set up Avengers Doomsday, yet I'm still hyped to see Doomsday. You don't have to be like this, Marvel.

Telling my son he should avoid drug dealers is simple, but I sound like a lunatic telling him to avoid YouTubers who say it's cool to hit yourself in the face with a hammer. DARE did not prepare for this.

The first 10 minutes of Wrestlemania here are going to tell us a lot about where WWE is going.

Vrabel threads are excellent for identifying block/mute targets, being filled with misogynist my lefties and masshole Patriots fan lefties.

When Disney's CEO says "I know this is hard," I assume he means thinking of what to say if someone asks what percentage of his compensation would fund the salaries of all the people he just laid off.

Just when I thought Pope Leo couldn't be cooler.

If Darby Allin is randomly trending, I know he isn't dead but something he did probably should have killed him.

And our leader is Boss Nass but dumber and cruder.

So we're going to blockade the Strait of Hormuz if Iran doesn't end its blockade of the Strait of Hormuz? Blockade II, Boating Boogaloo!

For some reason, I keep thinking Eric Swalwell is that guy who wouldn't shut up about game theory on the Nazi bird site, which makes the allegations against him even more believable.

The Testaments sounds like the name of a family comedy where the parents are pastors of rival churches.

My main hope for the future is to live in a mostly free liberal democracy that isn't at war with anyone and I'm not sure exactly how HR expects me to put that in my personal development plan.

"Houston, you're on mute."

Every time we bring the 9yr-okd to No Kings, an elder protester gives him a flag. And this time we missed the Jehovah's Witnesses while we were out. Double bonus and fuck ICE!

Once we have boots on the ground, what happens when Iran captures some POWs? We know what Fuckface thinks of soldiers who die in combat. What's he going to drool out when the press asks him about mounting a rescue or negotiating a prisoner exchange?

If the Pope hates your guts but the ayatollah wants to hang, you're probably doing something wrong as a Catholic.

Maybe the market is a little too efficient if it instantly swings through billions of dollars in theoretical value every time Trump posts something deranged from the shitter.

I'm old enough to know what it's like to click a link and watch a mostly text page load for 5 minutes. Now if any link takes more than 5 seconds I switch tabs for something to do during the unreasonable wait.

I get that sources can dictate how they're described, but it's really weird to hear about Mueller's death from "two people familiar with the matter."

I walked into the office this morning and a conference room door had been covered over in drywall so I'm pretty sure this is an Amontillado situation but it's unclear whether I should report it to security or HR.

Why is every subscription publication in bed with Big Tote Bag? Or did Big Tote Bag arise from the proliferation of subscriber gifts?

I rarely find out an influencer exists before they do something shitty enough for everyone to notice. I feel like that's about the best one can hope for while existing online.

There's a free breakfast spread in the office but lots of people are there talking and if I go over there someone might try to talk to me so clearly I'm passing on free breakfast. I am an adult human.

Rubio has Thomas Jefferson's old job and is 4th in the presidential line of succession yet still can't muster a crumb of dignity.

When the crossword wants me to know personal shit about Eisenhower on a Monday it can go straight to hell.

So it's okay for Fuckface to meet flag-draped coffins with a cheap baseball cap on but Obama disrespected the troops by returning a (living) marine's salute with a coffee cup in his hand?

Obviously this new shitweasel will be as bad or worse than Noem. But the important thing here is the show of weakness from a regime desperate to project strength.

If you attack and sink another boat in international waters without a declaration of war or a letter of marque and reprisal, you're a pirate, right? That's what that word means?

Burn me but launching the newest crowdfunding campaign on the day my Eye of the World leatherbound arrived was a masterstroke. Well played, @dragonsteelbooks.com!

It's fun how, in Olympic years, school band directors get a layup on the setlist for the concert closest to the Games. That's John Williams for you!

Grimly amusing to see an these other Middle East tyrants be like "How DARE Iran attack us just because we host the military bases used to attack them?"

Alfred Nobel supposedly left his entire fortune to endow the eponymous prizes because he didn't want to be remembered as "the merchant of death." These dipshits are like, "Merchants of death, bruh! Let's fucking goooooo!"

Tough to just have a normal day knowing there are eight billion humans on the planet and this motherfucker is the most consequential.

It's bad enough that billionaires can make themselves everyone's problem without them also making their fucking kids everyone's problem.

Even if Warner Bros. sells the movie/TV show business to Netflix, won't Baby Elison still buy CNN from the remaining husk? I guess in this scenario we'll still have movies that aren't Nazi propaganda?

If It Happens during the state of the union, the clip will be just as hilarious when it gets posted here. There isn't another reason to watch if you're not getting paid to do it.

"The fastest ever marathon time is 2 hours 35 seconds. Could you do that, Dad?" Hard not to sob a bit when your kid casually asks if you're one of history's greatest athletes because OF COURSE you must be.

Figure skaters go out on an ice sheet with knives on their feet and do shit I'd be impressed to see a regular human land on a trampoline. That's pretty cool.

I like when it's Friday and they've narrowed down the weekend snow forecast to between one and fuck you inches.

If you complain about a paywall on a news article and then complain that billionaires are turning the news into right wing propaganda, I'm not really sure what to tell you.

Getting a lot of scam texts looking to 'confirm delivery info' for my tariff rebate. That's probably working pretty well on the racist grandparent demographic.

It's nice (I guess?) that Bluesky has reached the size/sophistication that, when I see a celebrity's name trending, I can be pretty sure they either died or got accused of some shit.

It stresses me out when the chef in a cooking video barehands raw meat and then just goes around touching the rest of their kitchen. Are you going to wipe down the pepper grinder later? At least throw in an edit that lets me think you maybe washed your hands off camera!