less glamour. more messy sheets, cozy sweaters, stocking runs, and bedhead.

for safety reasons, please properly secure your flotation device.

This animation + sound + inflatable sculpture event looks really cool. Anyone want to go? June 18 evening. docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1F...

Yes, that is a squashed cake. I had a great time at Velvet Hearts burlesque two weeks ago. Few things make me feel as buzzy & drunk as a confident woman dancing with eye contact. Wew. Thanks for the adventure. 🐾 Y'all should check out their future shows!

It happened, I raised some of my rates! Dates already in the scheduling process will be grandfathered. Don't be afraid to ask if you have questions 💜

if you have topology skills, please reach out. Because this strappy little number was IMPOSSIBLE to get on and I need professional assistance if I'm ever going to get back into it.

He bought literally every item off my wishlist 😳 But the thing I'm most excited to get is a motherfucking accordion. Do you know how many neighbors I'm going to irritate with this bad boy? Thank you for making my life more delightful.

I can look out & feel hundreds of lives playing out in the next building over. Someone is falling in love. Someone just burned the chicken. Someone just closed their eyes in prayer. Someone is getting absolutely railed. Someone is looking out the window.

"whatcha reading?"

new jeans

my first pair of red bottoms! 😍 (thank you for supporting adventures by sponsoring my scuba lessons and my gear. Can't wait to dive together.)

Is anyone else out there watching Culinary Cup? I need to dish with someone.

tired of the rat race. could we just sit here a while before moving on up? a little rest amidst all the striving.

A magical trip to Atlanta! Squishy belugas, charming one-eyed sea lions, a treasure hunt for amazing pizza, smuggling truffle salt, and discovering grease traps. Thank you, puppy 🐾.

Mid-West babes, I'm coming your way. Detroit 4/26 Chicago 4/27-28, 5/4 Minneapolis 4/30-5/3 Indianapolis 5/5-5/6 Columbus 5/7 Cleveland 5/8-10 Pittsburgh 5/11-12 nicolaryder.com/connect 💌 [email protected] *Dates flexible, pre-book or miss me 💋

ain't no sunshine when she's gone

does anyone know, are trollz and labubus from the same cinematic universe?

I grew up on a farm where we regularly had to fix our own tractors. I also briefly worked for John Deere and watched as they tried to justify why people shouldn't be allowed to do that. Get absolutely fucked Deere, right to repair forever and ever www.thedrive.com/news/john-de...

POV a nose boop

I sat down with my schedule this week and realized I am doing too much! To sustain my good cheer, creative projects, and advocacy work, I'll be cutting back a bit. I'll be raising my rates for starting June. Bookings made before then will be honored, so... ✏️📅✅

I really want to see Hedwig & the Angry Inch in May/June! Anyone want to go? citytheatrecompany.org/production/1...

life is too short to edit out the imperfections. leaves fall with entropy, thick thighs come with squish, hair strands kiss wind. nothing to be done but love the chaos.

feelin flirty

I've often called Pittsburgh "sticky." It's a little grimy-gritty, not quite dirty. It's a little hard to leave. Full of the sweetness, nostalgia, and sourness of hard candy. Leaves lips smacking and fingers stuck. Over eight years in, I continue to be a willing captive here.

back on my mermaid bullshit

people pleasing is out, but good girls are still in

one thing all bisexual girls agree Chris Fleming can get it for free

If you think I'm bad at estimating time just wait til you try Lyft/Uber

My latest for @mashable.com! Ana's story led me to dig into who's behind all the censorship and financial backlash that adult content creators are facing. Lmk your thoughts 👀 Thank you to @publicpubics.bsky.social & @internetmaggie.com for your insights, and my editor @annaroseiovine.bsky.social 💕

a hair stylist could never match the incredible energy of tousled playtime hair

sometimes the outtakes are better than the "real thing." life is never going the way I plan it, but I'm always trusting it will veer in a beautiful new direction.

something something power of discipline

🎈 Can you RIDE A UNICYCLE? If so, I want to meet you! 🎪 For the duration of 2026, If you can either ride a unicycle or prove that you once knew how to ride a unicycle*, I'll give you a discount on your first session.

I'm a pretty optimistic person but I feel like the universe is testing me this winter. The furnace went out at 11pm on a Friday at 0⁰ and it feels like the last straw 😭

Do we know any good photographers in NYC? hoping to do a shoot while I'm there next month!

Once us girlies figure out how to put "meaningful infrastructure investment" on our wishlists, the cities will be saved

where to next?

catch me through the doorway. I'll smile when I turn around and realize it's you.

A man in the grocery store stopped me and said, "Let me ask you a question. Do you want that ring now, or do I gotta ask your momma first?"

even I am not sure exactly what happened here. but I do know it was good.

a body that is more wild terrain than calculated architecture.

let's go somewhere warm in 2026?

I'm turning 31! 🍰 Thanks to every who has helped me celebrate becoming a prime number again. It's been a rollercoaster of a year. I feel so lucky to have y'all in my life, in small and large ways.

craving some cozy ☕

I don't post many of my gifts but I am currently in love with these obscenely expensive (but Josie-proof and cat-safe) fake candles. They look so real! Thank you to everyone who helps make my home a cozy haven. Holiday vibes just intensified.

If anyone wants some cringe and amusement... "LANGUAGE PATTERNS OF THE P**TUTE: Some Insights into a Deviant Subculture", in a 1978 journal on semantics You could literally publish anything the 70s, so sad I wasn't alive to capitalize on such an era. jstor.org/stable/42575...

Results are in! I've carefully examined the entirety of my stocking collection while sick in bed. FINDING: 50% of my stockings have runs. CONCLUSION: The girl should purchase stockings 2 pairs at a time to maximize the number of whole, untorn sets available on a given day.

The last two years, I pour out a whiskey for a beloved coworker who started in the industry far too young and died far too young. Her smile was a beacon. If you want to join me honoring her, pour one out and send some love or money to @swoonalliance.bsky.social

Sick again for the third time in three weeks 😭 Did one of you curse me?? What is this?!