My last political joke of the night. "Kristi Noem was not born. She is a construct created by Arasaka labs in Cyberpunk 2077." I played that game fifteen times. I know a robot when I see one. THANK YOU! GOODNIGHT! *Bows*

Ah... It's been a long year. It's been two weeks, but a long year. Lord have mercy.

*Wheezing* ICE is wearing desert camo in the middle of winter in Minnesota. "(Bleepa) Did you know that I can SEE YOU?" How stupid are these people? Seriously! You RIGHT there! 🤣

Today, I learned a very important lesson in therapy. "Liking things about yourself is enough. You don't have to love yourself to LIKE yourself." Woo... Girl, This therapist is getting a pay raise by the time I'm done. 🤣

Allow me to tell you something that I don't think you've heard today. "You are a very nice person." YOU. You, dummy. The one reading this post. YES, YOU! IN THE BACK? I SEE YOU LURKING! LIKE, SHARE AND SUBSCRIBE!

Man, This therapist is whooping my ass. Boy, I tell you...

The Sims used to be my comfort video game. Then EA said, "You want a popcorn machine?" I said, "Yes! I love popcorn." EA said, "THIRTY DOLLARS! NO CORN FOR YOU!" Bastids...

Therapist: "Do you like yourself?" Me: "No, Not really..." It's depressing as hell, but it's good to get things off your chest.

The best part about going to therapy is realizing, "Oh... I'm the problem! Let me work on that!"

Progress is not linear. It took me seven therapists, but I see that now...

I'm learning a lot about myself through therapy. Sorry if I seem a bit random...

It's ok to rant. But, sometimes I need to reel it in. I'm like a tiny Chihuahua on a leash. Just barking and shit... 🤣

My previous set of rants were because I couldn't sleep. Sorry about that. Insomnia is the worst! I try not to... do *that* anymore.

The following rants are brought to you by Insomnia. "Insomnia! Because who cares about what goes on during the day anyway? Nothing matters. Rich people own everything. You're just a worker ant. Nothing matters!" (Bleep!)

I can't play video games that are meant for relaxation. No, I don't give a (bleep) about your stupid farm in Stardew Valley- WHERE ARE THE FIREARMS? Where is the insider trading? I am bored as (bleep) out here! Goddamn, I quit drugs for THIS?

I can't play video games meant for relaxation. Because if it doesn't have a firearm in it? I feel less American... THANK YOU! GOODNIGHT! *Bows*

I can't play video games that are meant for relaxation. I am a Gun and Ball gamer and I will die on this hill! Or until GTA 6 comes out. Whichever comes first...

I can't play video games that are meant for relaxation. I died once in Minecraft and started hurling slurs... I JUST WANT DIAMONDS, YOU PRICK!

I can't play video games that are meant for relaxation. I just want to annex an entire city in "Age of Empires." They had more gold than me and it pissed me off...

Shhh! Shhh! Wait! Y'all hear that? Shh! Quiet! There it goes again. Something stupid this way comes. I sense something stupid in the air...

"There is no war in Ba Sing Se..." Me: "Where are my tax dollars going then?!"

My lore with fast food continues...

Me, when Republicans start talking...

It's been a tough few days. Only cheese could make me feel better...

Goodnight, my degenerates. 💕

*Walks back in* Man, That was a LOT in therapy today... I demand you give someone a hug. HUG SOMEONE OR YOU ARE GROUNDED!

Yesterday was a sad day in American history. You have a right to feel sad. I'm going to therapy... *Walks out*

If you all will excuse me! I'm eating bacon slightly depressed...

May today be better than yesterday, and may tomorrow become even better than that. Because holy shit... 🤦🏾‍♂️

Yesterday was one of those days where I thought to myself. "Nope. Shut the (bleep) up. Don't post out of anger." Sigh. I'm tired, Boss...

Twitter is a terrible dive bar filled with constant in-fighting. Bluesky is that one nightclub with absolutely bangers and MDMA...

My one-thousandth post on Bluesky. "I write to live! I live to write!" 1K posted! WOOOOOO!!!! YEA, BABY!!!

This is new. I used to yell about personal drama and politics all day. Now I just yell about writing and how difficult it actually is. Yes, I believe that writing is a very tough job. Unlike yours, CHERYL! What do you even do around here? Huh? CHERYL!

"No! Goddamn it, Chris. The action line is italicized. ITALICIZED!" Sorry, I'm yelling about writing...

I have been yelling at myself in my head ALL DAY today. And it literally all has to do with plot points and character progression. WHO THE FUCK AM I YELLING AT? 🤣

Is it weird to be nervous *before* writing? It's been like 3 years and I finally started writing again. But I can't help but feel a strong sense of nervousness with every line. "No, OXFORD COMMAS! Amigo, OXFORD!" THAT'S BEEN ME IN MY HEAD ALL DAY!

"We celebratin' tonight..."

I see I have already insulted the "Stranger Things" community. My work here is done!

Am I the only person on Earth who doesn't care about Stranger Things? Yea, I said it. That show sucked anyway. 🤣

Me: "My baby takes the morning train. He works from 9 to 5 and then-" I CAN'T GET THAT FRIGGING SONG OUT OF MY HEAD!

*Cyberpunk phone ring* Me: "15 scripts. 12 months. I'm gonna be busy for a while..."

"We wouldn't happen to be invading Venezuela today, would we?" ....................... "You got me. You got me!" "Aww! I fell for it! I fell for it!"

"Chris, You're not being helpful." Me: "Did you really expect me to be?"

"What? Huh? Oil? Who said something about oil? Bitch, You cookin'? Oil? Man, Idk- *Bam* COME ON, Y'ALL! LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!"

Millennials and Gen X: "I'VE PLAYED THESE GAMES BEFORE!!!"

Cheese. I love you so. Let me count the ways... *Snores* Ah! Sorry, Cheese makes me so sleepy. It's my ultimate weakness, I tell ya!

Why does cheese make me so sleepy? 🥱

I don't have the energy to yell about how stupid the President is. I'm pretty sure I've covered that...

"Why does your Sim always have so many children?!" She said, Glaring confused at the TV screen. "Because unlike me, My Sim gets laid." The woman was too stunned to speak... 🤣

My Sim has 40 kids and 6 grandkids. Not a cent in child support. He's 35... 🤣