These past few weeks have been some of the hardest I've ever had. Genuinely.

I'm emotionally exhausted. I'm just going to try and write and have fun. I have two new meds now. We'll see if they work. Last night was not fun.

PCP said everything is fine. Don't know why I'm like this. Doing another urinalysis tomorrow morning at a hospital. Starting a new Anxiety Med.

It's not a UTI My Kidney's seem fine Still having symptoms. I see my PCP tomorrow.

I just want to know what's wrong with me.

All weekend, no answer.

He is battle ready.

I've been back and fourth to the doctors all week but I have some results. Not Kidney Stones Not an enlarged prostate. The sucky thing is now I'm sitting between it's a simple UTI, or it's a Kidney disease/Infection. It's like being inbetween being told you either have a cold or Pneumonia.

They found trace amounts of blood in my urine. Fun.

QTP if your profile is LGBTIA+ safe 🌈❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈 My colors 💚🤍🩶🖤

SPPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCE

Bat Dog is all Ears 😍

Remember the voices in your head don't mean shit. They can tell you all sorts of things. My friend doesn't like me. They're mad at me. They're bored. I'm not good at this. Etc. You just gotta tell them to shut up. It's hard, but it's what you gotta do.

I have four traps in my room. The Room is clean, yet I can hear this mouse fucker scampering around and avoiding the traps. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I need to go for a walk. I'm having a breakdown over stupid shit. I need to stop assuming I've done something wrong everytime I try and do something.

Goddamn it the voices need to shut the fuck up. Just let me try and have fun without assuming things are going to upset people.

anyway, life is hell 👍

I miss spicy times

I accidentally opened someone's mail recently. Upon realizing it I taped it back up and said it back outside. However when I checked the door today, there was a threatening note taped to it " try opening my mail again you f ucking retard I dare you" there are six apartments and I don't feel safe.

So, the final arc of my six year old FF campaign is upon us. I'm cleaning and working, and all I can think about it how far I've come and how much the players of that game have changed me as a person. I think about their characters so often. I listen to music imagining them. I feel like crying.

He's going after the Opera and Ballet singers. Sub Zero looking ass..

Making sessions for a fun TTRPG should not be as stressful as it is.

anyways, I'm crying idky tho :D

Same sometimes tho.

made a beef roast pie tonight.

In a matter of moments my mood randomly plummets.

Mcdonald CEO bites a burger. "THIS FOOD PRODUCT PLEASES MY HUMAN TONGUE MMMMH IT FEELS GOOD IN MY GLORPOR GLAND AS HUMANS HAVE!!!" 👽

Also I have some notes and a plan for my DnD character tonight. I might be awkward but I'm going to do my best with him. I will have fun.

I'm going to fight my inner self and be more active in my friends groups I swear to god.

I'm so tired of getting kicked when I'm down.

Me: Calls Computer store on monday. Them: Your parts came in they should be done tomorrow. Me: Calls them tomorrow and hour before closing to check. Them: Oh, we haven't started it. Tomorrow probably.

Is there really a XIV dating app?

$625 pc repair. And I accidentally realized I ate some chips out of a bag which appeared to have been burrowed into by a mouse. I am not having a great day. I am tired. I'm not going to be able to play resident evil on Friday. I am just going to watch Batman and rest.

So, while talking to one of the people fixing my pc they casually drop the line. "Oh, btw Nvidia 40 series and 50 series cards can totally catch fire because Nvidia designed the cards wrong.

Brings PC into shop. Asks if it can be fixed by friday. Gets told probably. Guy behind the counter proceeds to absolutely dismantle my PC verbally. Basically my set up is a positional mess. Might need a new tower.

Severe panic attack always fun.

. . . Do I seriously need to bring my PC into the fucking shop three days before RE9 drops?

Love finding a lil lump on your leg. It doesn't hurt and I don't wanna google it because I don't feel like being told I'm dying and I'm fine in the same sentence because the internet is worthless for things like this.

Genuine Poster quality.

ALERT USER IS OUT OF ADIVAN ALERT NO AMMO REMAINING

Look, a little more of a rant. People so want to dismiss Diana and throw Logan, or Captian America, or Iron Man in to the mount Rushmoore of Superheroes. It's 100% based in misongynistic ideals. Yes Wolverine, Cap, Tony are all important. But Wonder Woman was a media defining femnist character.

If you genuinely don't believe Wonder Woman belongs on the Mount Rushmore of Superheroes. You're stupid.

Tonight It's been a bit of a mess. Dragged around by family have to wait for bed to inflate so I can't really sit on my computer. Just stuck dealing with Dad all night because I can't go where I usually am.

Having nightmares about upsetting your friends is never a fun time.