Harrison Butker needs to get back in the kitchen.

My retirement plan? Obviously it’s to go down in a [redacted] of [redacted]

Netflix should make a movie about Teddy Roosevelt becoming a wraith and breaking up monopolies through scaring CEOs into submission.

Anyone know the trick to reincarnate on a different planet?

This is my emotional support all consuming void of darkness.

Frodo after that first time wearing the ring had to want to smoke like a drunk cig.

The “vaporware as economy” digression of civilization will have both novel and somewhat permanent outcomes.

Some rich dork saying to not wear pajamas to the airport while the administration he works under undoes basic consumer rights protections for when airlines fail paying customers is one of the most out of touch things in a sea of out of touch things.

All the people who wouldn’t STFU about Illuminati depopulation programs and poisoning all of us with Chemtrails or whatever are fucking SILENT as the Trump admin allows for particulate pollution and putting PFAS pesticides on our food. It’s incredible watching conspiracy theorists fumble this one.

The discourse in MAGA world is so fundamentally broken that they’re literally arguing “what exactly is a ‘child’ what exactly is an ‘illegal order’?” Mind you these are the same people that tried to meme “what is a woman?” When they couldn’t find the clit if their life depended on it. Pathetic.

This is my formal request for Ghost to cover the song Satan Never Sleeps by Timi Yuro

The NFL said: “scripted? You think this shit is scripted?” and knocked the water over like the Chapelle black Bush skit. (No one you thought was good was that good and the teams that are good are unstoppable now)

MAGA is so bad for business they won’t release the jobs reports. What a pathetic movement.

The Duo Owl from Duolingo is definitely the Goetic demon Stolas.

If you have never interacted with a holocaust denier in real life just know you’re in a paradise compared to those of us who have.

IDK I’m just saying presidents have been scrutinized over way less

Trump def got Epstein killed. I’m next to certain at this point.

When this wretched walking corpse of fascism is finally laid to rest in its rune engraved demon trapping salt coffin, I just want everyone to know, the sequel is going to be coming down the barrel and we need to keep our head on a swivel. No more of this both sides bullshit. We need to bury the GOP.

The world will literally instantly be a better place when The Thing We All Know Is Going To Happen But Needs to Hurry Up™️ happens. But we also need to remember that no amount of feckless Democratic Party feigned bipartisanship can allow ICE agents to get away with all of this later. We need trials.

but his emails

If the Epstein files don’t make the MAGA movement fall apart at the seams and jeopardize the GOP going forward into time, then the depravity of much of the electorate should motivate the millions of non voters who must pull their heads out of their ass and organize against this rotting of leadership

If Sydney Sweeney and Jared Leto costar in a movie you technically get paid for watching it statistically speaking.

The people that tried to decode emails from Hillary & Podesta to make it seem like they had a child sex slave dungeon under a pizza parlor with no basement suddenly don’t have much to say as emails detailing Trumps disgusting behavior in no uncertain terms release. So much for save the children?

Happy Epstein Files Release Day to all who celebrate.

Sidney Sweeney being a right wing airhead is not breaking news. It’s typical and not even remotely surprising.

To all the fundamentalist religious folks saying “6 or 7” is a demonic ritual: Making a video about innocuous things being demonic rituals is a demonic ritual.

Idiots with a podcast mic being a dime a dozen is directly contributing to the decline of civilization.

Joe Rogan becoming a ‘skeptic’ of science and essentially the meathead equivalent of a Christian apologist is so predictable. It would be funny if he wasn’t a misinformation peddling troglodyte.

If I have to negotiate my own insurance every time I seek treatment I’m gonna do some very not so vaguely Italian American things in response.

Anyone who defends 50 year mortgages has a favorite flavor crayon.

I just sincerely hope that if the Mamdani agenda gets sandbagged by both establishment parties that people are wise enough to understand that it is not only a historically frequent occurrence by the US government establishment to sandbag anything helping the working class, but also insanely pathetic

The Democratic Party should be the new Conservative Party and a progressive party should take the place of meaningful opposition to conservative politics once the MAGA cult finally ceases to exist.

These Senate Democrats have a spine, it’s just in the closet where they keep all their skeletons and AIPAC donation receipts.

These crusty ass dems really said: “NYC voted for Zohran Mamdani so let’s ruin the lives of millions because now we look like outdated feckless losers so we might as well lean into it.”

Chuck Schumer is a dumb fuck Pass it on.

So proud of NYC of leading the way with Mamdani. It really is a spark of hope in times of darkness. We need to protect that man at all costs yall.

Vote like the life of the planet depends on it today

No plastic table is safe in Buffalo tonight.

I wonder if unique minimalist face tattoos will become fashionable with the advent of AI videos that can look like anyone and say or do anything.

Ever feel like you’re in the torrent of an incomprehensible semi conscious life force expression that inevitably evolves beyond the boundary of its initial form?

Christian nationalist fanatics will really look you in the eye and say Halloween is an evil and demonic holiday while people pass out candy and the NEXT DAY they will take away food security for millions of Americans and not self reflect miss me all the entire way there and back with that bullshit.

While it is obvious that the Republican Party leadership is a heaping pile of flaming shit make no mistake: The Democratic Party leadership is awful and woefully unprepared to deal with an autocratic fascist hostile takeover of the federal government. They just don’t have the willingness to fight.

The News Media industry knows it will lose most of its money once the Boomers are all gone. They are therefore catering to conservative viewpoints (due to the vast majority of boomers being conservative) in a last ditch effort to make some money before they go extinct by a more informed generation.

If I ever confuse a dementia test with a very hard IQ test then just euthanize me.

I hope I live to see the day the Republican Party ceases to exist. Let the Democrats be the center right party they’re obsessed with maintaining and get a Progressive Left party to be the mainstream opposition to the Dems. Voting Republican might as well be a political cyanide pill at this point.

Tax subsidized government approved violent thugs trying to start a civil war was apparently not enough. They need to starve millions and take away their healthcare too. If a democratic government was doing this the republicans would never shut the fuck up about it.

But wait that’s impossible because my wife told me SHE is the sleepiest person on earth today. So you can’t be the sleepiest person because my wife has never been wrong once in her entire life.

The USA getting fleeced from within is a tale as old as time. All this stuff we have seen before. It’s the “this isn’t what I voted for” of it all that really sparkles my shine ya know?

Opus D.E.I.

We don’t have a sitting president we have a shitting president.