The Dark Professor (rare archetype)
@evopsychgoogle.bsky.social
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professor of evolutionary psychology. under investigation for academic misconduct
i've seen bell curves you people wouldn't believe...
18 days ago
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they are indoctrinating our kids in college now by saying that proteins exist as a statistical ensemble of many different conformations. this is woke insanity. proteins have one fold, as determined by the folding energy landscapes global minimum
about 1 month ago
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of course, there is still turmoil in the world, but right now is the best time in human history to be alive as a CEO of a large company
about 2 months ago
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rip jeffrey, you wouldve loved the twitter account evopsychgoogle
2 months ago
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wow Aella just dropped an article that puts the entire scientific community to sh-
2 months ago
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alright, so the data in my paper isn't real. but the fact that it *could* be real says a lot about society
5 months ago
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i must look into this
6 months ago
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it has never been more over for evo psych than it is right now. this was all i had left, and it's gone, it's fucking gone
add a skeleton here at some point
8 months ago
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[average biologist]: i've been studying this conserved domain of unknown function for the past 2 years, and i still don't know what it's doing [average race science guy]: i SEE the fitness landscape of evolution stretching back in time. i HEAR its symphony. and it says i'm correct about racial IQ
10 months ago
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currently at the annual Conference for Racial Hygiene, and i notice a striking lack of leftists here, which just goes to show how little they care about hygiene
10 months ago
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11 months ago
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you, a dumb normal person watching HBO's Succession: "wow, what a scathing satire of late capitalism" me, an evo psych professor who can actually understand HBO's Succession: "Logan Roy is old lion, Kendall Roy is da young lion"
11 months ago
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oh, you think Elon is a weird freak for impregnating random women and abandoning them? have you considered that my evo psych graph says he's based, actually?
12 months ago
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whoah
12 months ago
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my research funding is gone, my paycheck has dried up, and i've had to resort to to cannibalising my newborn child to fend off starvation, but i am still thankful to Elon Musk. he has given me selection pressure, which will let me evolve super intelligence and strength
12 months ago
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reposted by
The Dark Professor (rare archetype)
nattie winters
about 1 year ago
you aren’t hearing from the dems because they’re hard at work down in the crispr lab growing vats of 2028 candidates twice as racist and 3x as old as biden
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i feel like there's been a miscommunication. i voted for Trump to cut the government funding for useless research, but instead he cut my research
about 1 year ago
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this is NOT what i asked for!!
add a skeleton here at some point
about 1 year ago
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biology is just the study of goo. you're studying fucking goo
about 1 year ago
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only people with 200+ IQ can solve this. i solved it within 10 minutes, fyi
about 1 year ago
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not that it matters, but if i ever did a major crime and people found my Goodreads account, everyone would say that i have great taste in books
about 1 year ago
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in light of recent events, i want to stress that evolutionary psychology actually teaches us that CEO's are good and should not be shot.
about 1 year ago
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oh no, the CEO shooter is an evo psych guy. i fear this will politicize my our normally apolitical field of research :/
about 1 year ago
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starting to get real sick of all these secretly high IQ janitors at my uni who keep solving difficult math equations on the chalkboard before i can
about 1 year ago
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male peacocks carry around huge tails at their own detriment, as if to say "yeah my genes are so good that i can have this handicap". human males do the same thing but with IBS and lower back pain
about 1 year ago
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for those still doubting my sexual market value: hundreds of gorgeous women have been liking my posts. all of them are named Sophie, which is an interesting but irrelevant detail in this story
about 1 year ago
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spiralling into a suicidal depression when i realise that there are people with higher IQs than me
about 1 year ago
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if i were to ever see a woman celebrating getting a PhD, my rudimentary male evolved psychology would have a psychotic break like one of those Lovecraft characters seeing incomprehensible cosmic horror
about 1 year ago
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lol, there's a lab at my university studying microbes that live in volcanic environments. @elonmusk please GUT all this wasteful/useless academic bullshit research, but please give more funding for my research into applying evo psych theory in business schools
about 1 year ago
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science got too political so it lost the public's trust, and by "public's trust" i mean me and by "got too political" i mean asking me to get vaccinated
about 1 year ago
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lab book entry: what's even the point anymore man
about 1 year ago
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*sigh* at this stupid thanksgiving dinner and my family believes classic twin studies are confounded can't accurately measure molecular heritability🤦
about 1 year ago
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i am the Dark professor
about 1 year ago
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developing a theory of "trickle down IQ"
about 1 year ago
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since the libs have left twitter, the right-wingers have been forced to beef amongst themselves. currently, there's a beef between the right-wing guys who believe seed oils are bad and the right-wing guys who don't believe seed oils are bad
about 1 year ago
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using my high intelligence, i've figured out how to generate my own podcasts in my mind, de novo, that i can listen to (in my mind). the podcasts are me talking about stuff like "wouldn't it be cool if...?" plus stuff i heard on Rogan
about 1 year ago
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i just saw a video of a man with 210 IQ say that God is real. my mind = blown!!
about 1 year ago
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my advisors are always saying shit like, "is that wise, my liege?"
about 1 year ago
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have fun in your echo chamber, sheeple ✌️. i'm now on anti-echo chamber bluesky with other renegades, because we all agree that bluesky has become an echo chamber
about 1 year ago
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my daily routine: • shape rotation of a cube in my mind: 4 sets of 12 reps • shape rotation of a larger cube in my mind: 3 sets of 6 reps • shape rotation of a hypercube cube in my mind: test my 1 rep max
about 1 year ago
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owning the libs by doing slave labour to prove i'm high-IQ
about 1 year ago
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so many new followers, yet i've hardly made any new posts. fools! "never interrupt your enemy when their making a mistake" - Sun Tzu
about 1 year ago
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[guy who sits on the computer and posts a lot] if we want to start winning at politics, we gotta sit on the computer and post a lot
about 1 year ago
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what our tribe needs is a powerful shaman
about 1 year ago
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đź‘‹ hi new blueksy users. just want to provide you with some useful info to get you settled in. what you need to know is that i was here first. stay out of my territory
about 1 year ago
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bluesky uses a logo of a butterfly. curious... [[my IQ kicks in]] the butterfly is a symbol of transformation and metamorphosis... [[enters dark IQ mode]] it is also a symbol of chaos
about 1 year ago
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my top tip for dealing with times of stress is to overproduce mucus
about 1 year ago
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there's going to be an evo psych advisor to the Trump administration
about 1 year ago
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curious, i seem to have evolved a brain that only notices typos in important emails after i've sent them. not sure how this was advantageous in the Pleistocene, but it's quite maladaptive for me in today's age
over 1 year ago
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i've figured out how to do this thing where i can download information into my brain by using my eyeballs to look at words. anyone else know about this??
over 1 year ago
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