My boy Tater getting some tail this morning

Trying to teach stepkids the joys of epic nerf battles. Progress: questionable at best

Second night in a row polishing off an entire bottle at once, it’s not my fault it tastes like martinellis

Being on both X and Bluesky feels like being a double agent 😏 In my obituary: “We never *did* manage to find out her political views…”

Why yes I AM drinking non-alcoholic sparkling wine straight out of the bottle to feel better about having to work so late tonight

But if someone on this platform knows how to fix that for me I’m all ears (and all feet)

Taking a weiner-forward approach to this app