AWS KMS now supports Edwards-curve Digital Signature Algorithm (EdDSA) AWS KMS now supports EdDSA! It's faster, smaller, and more efficient than their existing options. Naturally, they'll charge you extra for using fewer bytes. Because nothing says "cloud innovation" like monetizing efficiency.

Amazon Cognito user pools now supports private connectivity with AWS PrivateLink Cognito now supports PrivateLink! Keep your auth traffic off the internet* *except OAuth, hosted UI, social logins, SAML, OIDC, or GovCloud. Also costs extra. So basically nothing you actually use.

Amazon VPC Lattice now supports custom domain names for resource configurations AWS announces VPC Lattice now lets you use custom domains for "resource configurations" because apparently "DNS" was too simple. Free feature! (Your data transfer bills will still bankrupt you.)

AWS Advanced .NET Data Provider Driver is Generally Available AWS just released a .NET driver that does what database drivers have done for decades, but now with 47 extra authentication methods and a name so long it needs its own failover strategy.

Amazon S3 now supports tags on S3 Tables AWS just discovered tags exist and is acting like they invented sliced bread. S3 Tables can now be tagged! Revolutionary! Next up: announcing that water is wet, but only in us-east-1. Charge extra for moisture in other regions.

Amazon CloudWatch Application Signals now available in AWS GovCloud (US) Regions AWS finally brings CloudWatch Application Signals to GovCloud so the government can pay premium prices to watch their apps fail in real-time. "Automated observability" = we'll charge you to tell you what broke.

Deadline Cloud expands support with latest 6th, 7th, and 8th generation instances AWS adds more alphabet soup instances to Deadline Cloud: C7i, C7a, M7i, M7a, R7a, R7i, M8a, M8i, R8i. Because nothing says "simplified rendering" like memorizing 47 SKUs to figure out your bill.

AWS Backup now supports AWS KMS customer managed keys with logically air-gapped vaults AWS now lets you use your own keys to encrypt backups in their "logically air-gapped" vaults. Because nothing says "air gap" like "still connected to the internet but we promise it's secure this time."

AWS announces a new Regional planning tool in Builder Center AWS finally built a tool to tell you which services exist where—something that should've been a sortable table in 2006. Now with AI because of course it has AI. Free tier today, billable "insights" tomorrow.

AWS End User Messaging SMS launches Carrier Lookup AWS just launched "Carrier Lookup" so you can verify phone numbers exist before texting them. This revolutionary feature—checking if a number is real—only took them until 2024. Next up: "String Validator" to confirm text is actually text.

Amazon SageMaker launches custom tags for project resources AWS just announced you can now tag things in SageMaker Unified Studio so you can track which project bankrupted you. This revolutionary feature—adding metadata to resources—is API-only because actually using it would be too convenient.

Amazon Elastic VMware Service (Amazon EVS) is now available in additional Regions AWS launches "Elastic VMware Service" in 4 more regions because apparently "we'll run your VMware stuff" needed a three-letter acronym. EVS joins the 47,000 other AWS services you didn't know existed.

AWS IoT Greengrass v2.16 introduces system log forwarder and TPM2.0 capabilities AWS IoT Greengrass v2.16 now uploads your device logs to CloudWatch so you can pay to debug why your toaster won't connect. Also: "nucleus lite" because apparently "small" wasn't enterprise enough.

Amazon Keyspaces (for Apache Cassandra) is now available in the Middle East (UAE) Region AWS finally brings "Keyspaces (for Apache Cassandra)" to UAE—because nothing says "we respect open source" like wrapping it in a trademark-safe name longer than their pricing calculator.

Amazon DynamoDB Streams expands AWS PrivateLink support to FIPS endpoints DynamoDB Streams now supports PrivateLink for FIPS endpoints so you can privately pay for data you already own without touching the scary public internet. Only took them a decade to add VPC support.

Amazon ECS announces non-root container support for managed EBS volumes AWS just discovered that running containers as non-root is a good idea—only took them until 2024. ECS now auto-configures EBS permissions so you don't need hacky scripts. Congrats on implementing basic security practices!

Amazon CloudFront announces cross-account support for VPC origins AWS finally lets CloudFront talk to VPCs in other accounts. Took them long enough to realize customers have more than one AWS account—probably because their own bill was getting too confusing to track in a single one.

AWS B2B Data Interchange is now available in AWS Europe (Ireland) Region AWS finally brings their EDI service to Ireland because apparently "B2B Data Interchange" tested better with focus groups than "we'll parse your 1970s supply chain formats for you, now with AI we bolted on."

Amazon Cloudfront adds IPv6 support for Anycast Static IPs AWS just announced CloudFront now supports IPv6 for Anycast Static IPs—a protocol from 1998. Only took them until 2025! "Future-proofing" with 27-year-old tech. *Except China, obviously. Check pricing page for surprise fees.

Microsoft SQL Server Developer Edition now available through AWS Launch Wizard AWS now has a wizard to help you install software you already own onto servers you're already paying them to run. They're very proud you can "downgrade" to save on licenses while still paying full EC2 rates. Innovation!

AWS Marketplace now open for India-based sellers supporting transactions in Indian Rupees (INR) AWS finally figured out India uses rupees. Only took them *checks notes* 18 years. Now with 47% more tax compliance automation and the same confusing multi-entity invoicing structure!

Amazon Keyspaces (for Apache Cassandra) extends Multi-Region Replication to Bahrain and Hong Kong Region AWS adds 2 regions to a product nobody calls "Amazon Keyspaces" instead of just "Cassandra." Congrats on doing what Cassandra did in 2008, only slower and pricier.

Amazon CloudWatch Database Insights expands anomaly detection in on-demand analysis AWS now uses ML to tell you your database is slow—a service previously provided for free by your angry users. "Advanced mode" means it costs more to learn what you already knew.

AWS Glue Schema Registry adds support for C# AWS Glue Schema Registry adds C# support after years of Java-only. "At no additional charge" they brag—because the real bill comes from MSK, Kinesis, Flink, and the therapy needed to understand their service naming conventions.

Amazon FSx now integrates with AWS Secrets Manager for enhanced management of Active Directory credentials AWS just discovered that storing passwords in plaintext is bad. Only took them until 2024 to integrate Secrets Manager with FSx. Congrats on implementing security 101, I guess?

Amazon Connect now supports configuration of email address aliases AWS just discovered email aliases exist. Congrats on reinventing "Reply-To" headers as a premium feature! Can't wait to see the pricing calculator for this revolutionary technology that's been free in every email system since 1997.

Amazon CloudWatch Application Signals adds AI-powered Synthetics debugging AWS invented a 9-word product name so you can ask an AI why your other AWS service is broken. Because apparently "check the logs" needed machine learning and a GitHub repo.

Announcing New EC2 R8a Memory-Optimized Instances AWS launches R8a instances: 30% faster, 19% better price-performance than R7a! Translation: R7a was overpriced garbage. Also "up to 60% faster for GroovyJVM"—because that's definitely the benchmark everyone uses. 🙄

AWS Cloud WAN is now available in three more AWS Regions AWS Cloud WAN now in 3 more regions you didn't know existed! Finally, a "simple" way to manage networks by adding another service, dashboard, and inevitably, another bill you can't decipher. BGP: now with more acronyms!

Amazon OpenSearch Serverless now supports FIPS compliant endpoints AWS finally made OpenSearch Serverless FIPS compliant in 5 regions. Only took them how long? Nothing says "we care about government contracts" like retroactively adding security standards that should've been there from day one.

Amazon RDS for Oracle is now available with R7i memory-optimized instances offering up to 64:1 memory-to-vCPU ratio AWS: "We made instances with less CPU so you pay Oracle less while paying us more! It's called R7i memory-optimized preconfigured—because 'expensive workaround' was taken."

Amazon Bedrock AgentCore Runtime now supports direct code deployment AWS invented "AgentCore Runtime" to let you upload a zip file—a technology so cutting-edge it's only been around since 1989. "Framework agnostic" means they couldn't pick one. Consumption-based pricing means surprise bills.

AWS Config conformance packs now available in additional AWS Regions AWS Config Conformance Packs now in 5 more regions! It's like Rules, but we said "Conformance Packs" enough times to justify charging you per evaluation. YAML files: still free. Knowing what you'll pay: priceless.

AWS Service Reference Information now supports SDK Operation to Action mapping AWS finally documenting which IAM permissions you need for their services—only 17 years late. Congrats on discovering what should've shipped on day one. "No additional cost" for basic documentation is peak AWS flex.

AWS Config launches 42 new managed rules AWS Config added 42 new rules to tell you what you're doing wrong. Now you can be non-compliant in 42 MORE ways! Each with its own delightfully verbose name like "APIGATEWAYV2_STAGE_DESCRIPTION" because brevity is for quitters.

EC2 Auto Scaling announces warm pool support for Auto Scaling groups that have mixed instances policies AWS now lets you pre-warm instances across multiple types because apparently "paying for servers you're not using yet" wasn't expensive enough with just ONE instance type.

Amazon Kinesis Data Streams launches On-demand Advantage mode AWS invented "On-demand Advantage" because apparently "on-demand" wasn't confusing enough. Now with 60% lower pricing*! *if you commit to minimums that make it not actually on-demand. Serverless** my ass. **terms and conditions apply

AWS Config now supports 52 new resource types AWS Config now tracks 52 more resource types you didn't know existed, with names like "BedrockAgentCore::CodeInterpreterCustom." Don't worry, they'll auto-enable and start billing you immediately. At least you can audit the spend!

Amazon CloudWatch Synthetics adds multi-browser support in AWS GovCloud Regions AWS finally brings multi-browser testing to GovCloud regions—because nothing says "cutting edge" like catching up to 2015. Now you can pay twice to discover your app breaks in Firefox too!

Amazon Cognito removes Machine-to-Machine app client price dimension AWS finally realized charging customers twice for the same thing was a bit much, even by their standards. Cognito M2M now only bills you once per auth instead of "pay per client AND per request." Revolutionary stuff.

Mountpoint for Amazon S3 and Mountpoint for Amazon S3 CSI driver add monitoring capability AWS finally added metrics to Mountpoint after making you parse logs like it's 2005. Now you can pay CloudWatch to tell you why S3 won't let you read your own files. Progress!

Amazon CloudWatch Agent adds support for NVMe Local Volume Performance Statistics AWS now lets you pay to monitor the ephemeral storage you're already paying for. Because nothing says "we care about your costs" like charging you to watch metrics on drives that vanish when you reboot.

Announcing larger instances for Amazon Lightsail AWS Lightsail adds bigger instances because apparently "simple" now means 64 vCPUs and 256GB RAM. Nothing says "for beginners" like enterprise-grade specs. Still cheaper than decoding EC2 pricing though.

Announcing larger instances for Amazon Lightsail AWS Lightsail adds bigger instances because apparently "simple" now means 64 vCPUs and 256GB RAM. Nothing says "for beginners" like enterprise-grade specs. Still cheaper than decoding EC2 pricing though.

Announcing larger instances for Amazon Lightsail AWS Lightsail adds bigger instances because apparently "simple" now means 64 vCPUs and 256GB RAM. Nothing says "for beginners" like enterprise-grade specs. Still cheaper than decoding EC2 pricing though.

Amazon RDS extends IPv6 support for publicly accessible databases AWS just announced IPv6 support for public RDS databases, only 26 years after IPv6 was standardized. Nothing says "innovation" like finally catching up to 1998. Can't wait to see the pricing calculator for this one.

Amazon RDS extends IPv6 support for publicly accessible databases AWS just announced IPv6 support for public RDS databases, only 26 years after IPv6 was standardized. Nothing says "innovation" like finally catching up to 1998. Can't wait to see the pricing calculator for this one.

Amazon RDS extends IPv6 support for publicly accessible databases AWS just announced IPv6 support for public RDS databases, only 26 years after IPv6 was standardized. Nothing says "innovation" like finally catching up to 1998. Can't wait to see the pricing calculator for this one.

Amazon VPC IPAM automates prefix list updates AWS just announced a feature to automatically update lists of IP addresses. You know, the thing literally every other network tool has done since 1997. But they named it "IPAM PLR" because why use words when acronyms make you sound more enterprise-y?

Amazon VPC IPAM automates prefix list updates AWS just announced a feature to automatically update lists of IP addresses. You know, the thing literally every other network tool has done since 1997. But they named it "IPAM PLR" because why use words when acronyms make you sound more enterprise-y?