I have to admit, Trump picking a fight with the Pope was not on my list of things to look out for in 2026, but it's really not that unexpected when you think about it.

From my 2024 Heroes & Villains Live Tour. Tickets for my latest tour are available from: JonathanPie.com

What a soul-crushing binary choice. Boot out one spineless disappointment of a Prime Minister, just to replace him with a loud-mouthed, faux pint-swilling grifter who’ll sell the country out to the highest bidder. We’re not just in trouble - we’re completely fucked.

Kanye: BANNED! jonathanpie.com youtu.be/u9YjZcI1PJk?...

Did I accidentally shove a fistful of LSD up my arse or did this really happen?

I'd think this was an April Fool's joke if it wasn't a Reform UK member saying it...

BRAND NEW PODCAST EPISODE 💥 This week Tom Walker @jonathanpienews.bsky.social returns to discuss…. - More BBC presenter scandal - Long overdue changes to ‘non-crime hate incidents’ - The extraordinary price of tapas Apple: bit.ly/GeoffNorcott... Spotify: bit.ly/GeoffNorcott...

After some reflection, I’ve realised Andrew Tate is actually incredibly astute. His words have resonated with me and I would like to join the Manosphere. Bitches love me because I can do more press-ups than you and my NatWest Savers account is moderately substantial.

The Perfect Easter gift for all the family. JonathanPie.com for tickets.

My thoughts on the tearing down of statues - from my 2021 FAKE NEWS Tour. Tickets to this year’s tour at jonathanpie.com youtu.be/VA181hnNj3c?...

Some venues are now sold out and others have only a few tickets left. Fuck. I'd better stop watching reruns of Columbo and get writing... jonathanpie.com

Here are some Easter eggs from the 1980's with no mention of Easter on the packaging. My personal favourite was the Lion Bar one. Can we all move on from this now please?

When Reform's Sarah Pochin says here: "We'll do all the naughty stuff", she means pure undiluted racism, free from the gaze of the press. Hilarious.

Keir Starmer today officially announced he would not fondle Trump's balls. youtu.be/iAcgIMDQsog?...

Tickets to my live show at The Hammersmith Apollo in October are available at www.eventim.co.uk/artist/jonat... For all other venues, see JonathanPie.com

He's insane isn't he? I mean actually insane.

This man has access to the nuclear codes.

Full version: youtu.be/iAcgIMDQsog?... Tickets to my live show at: JonathanPie.com

Yes Jacob, but I expect these ladies don't hunt and torture animals for sport.

WAR in IRAN. Tickets to see my new live show at: JonathanPie.com youtu.be/iAcgIMDQsog?...

Call me Mr Bastard, but might I suggest a prison sentence would be more of a deterrent than a fine the consumers will end up paying?

LONDON CALLING! Hammersmith Apollo this autumn. Click Link For Tickets: www.eventim.co.uk/artist/jonat...

From my 2018 tour. Tickets for this year’s tour available at: JonathanPie.com

Research for my new show The End of The World According to Jonathan Pie is going well. Looks to be my most hilarious show yet! Lots of lols. JonathanPie.com for tickets.

Labour has just had a shocking defeat. Meanwhile at the other end of the spectrum we have Rupert Lowe: "Anyone who would rather watch reruns of Mahabharat than Only Fools and Horses shall be deported." What a fucking state UK politics is in right now.

The Gorton and Denton result should be a brutal wake-up call for Labour - but I'm not convinced they've even plugged the alarm clock in yet.

I'm in no way opposed to enforcing headphones on public transport. I do not want to listen to other people's shit music. But linking this to 'foreigners' is bizarre. What else will mass deportations fix? People not putting their trolley back after a big Asda shop? Chewing loudly? Farting in lifts?

Hammersmith Apollo this Halloween! www.eventim.co.uk/artist/jonat...

A Royal Reckoning. JonathanPie.com youtu.be/yiOvAgw4hwE?...

Apparently there are a lot of people around today who are under the impression that Tourette’s is something that can be controlled. I wonder if these are the same people who would tell someone with chronic depression to just 'cheer up'?

A Royal Reckoning. JonathanPie.com youtu.be/yiOvAgw4hwE?...

Now that's just rubbing salt into the wound isn't it?

Andrew Mountbatten Windsor has been arrested on suspicion of misconduct in public office. You can be assured he will be having a FUCKING AWFUL birthday today.

Well, I think we can safely say Labour have now well and truly outdone the Tories on this one. Well done, I guess. 🙄

You mean they realised that legally they were on thin ice? A 'win' for Reform, and another embarrassing U-turn for Labour. FFS.

Give her what she really wants this Valentine's Day. Me. JonathanPie.com

How can Starmer regain any authority or respect after this?

Keir today! Gone tomorrow? Tickets to see my new live show at JonathanPie.com youtu.be/XD0kXDKtW7o?...

Wait, has he even done a U-turn on this own resignation?

"I'm too smart to read". I have nothing more to add to this.

Donald J. Trump. President of the United States. Classy as ever.

Can Starmer survive this one?

Trump's skin is thinner than a paper straw halfway through a McDonald's milkshake.

This should never, under any circumstances, ever, be considered ‘normal’.

Terror in America. Jonathanpie.com youtu.be/oU7LOpQFOPQ?...

Tickets: jonathanpie.com

It's not even the Tory-lite Party any more, is it? It's just The Tories - with special guest star, Nigel Farage.

There has to be somewhere between: 'let absolutely anyone/everyone into your country', and: 'execute people in the streets'. Reform appear to be in favour of the latter.