When you express concerns about problematic behaviors, you’re not “focusing on the negative.” You’re exercising discernment and protecting yourself.

Coexisting peacefully with uncertainty looks like staying fluid, releasing outcomes, caring for your nervous system, and surrounding yourself with emotionally mature, supportive people. It's ok not to know what's next.

You don’t owe anyone unlimited access to your life

People are allowed to have feelings about your boundaries. Those feelings aren’t your responsibility to fix.

Clear boundaries communicated with respect aren't weapons. They’re kindnesses.

In my very lengthy therapy journey, there’s a single question that absolutely changed my life, and that is this: What if the problem isn’t me?

Your nervous system's requirements are valid, and honoring them isn't selfish—it's necessary for your wellbeing

Needing alone time isn't “antisocial.” It's honoring your nervous system's needs for rest and restoration.

Things that brought me joy this week

You don’t have to justify or explain your boundaries. A simple “this doesn’t work for me” is enough.

Acknowledging your successes isn't arrogance. You can be genuinely humble and kind and generous while still fully owning what you've accomplished and what you're good at.

Emotional caretakers tend to attract friends and partners who need (and often demand) caretaking

Embracing your actual needs (not just the ones you think are easy to meet) is an act of profound self-love. When you name them clearly and unapologetically, you give others the sacred opportunity to love you well.

Quintessential Rhode Island photo ☕️🌊

Happy Monday! Gentle reminder that hustle culture is a crock of shit ❤️

Happy sunny Sunday, Bluesky ❤️

If you grew up with emotionally immature caregivers, you were likely taught that having boundaries was selfish or dangerous. Your nervous system is wired to associate limit-setting with anxiety and guilt.

Happy Saturday, Bluesky ❤️

You can love your family deeply while still saying “no” to harmful dynamics

You don't need to burn yourself out to prove your commitment. You don't need to sacrifice your wellbeing for the illusion of productivity.

Clap for me—I left my house (after dark, no less) and made new friends tonight 😭💕

You don't have to participate in every conflict you're invited to

The healthiest relationships aren't those without boundaries—they're those where boundaries are communicated clearly, respected consistently, and adjusted as needed through open dialogue

When we’re focused on managing other people’s emotions, we disconnect from our own

Ways I can care for myself today: allow myself to cry if that's what I need, remind myself that it's ok to be afraid of change, allow for imperfection, and create space for time in nature.

The idea that “families don’t keep secrets” and therefore anything you share with each other is fair game for family gossip erodes trust and psychological safety within the family

Ways I can care for myself today: attend mindfully to my houseplants, keep something soft with me at my desk, give myself a few extra minutes for transitions, prioritize meals and hydration

Listen, if I have to purchase heating oil in MAY, I just might lose it

As a former professional B2B writer often hired specifically for my ability to clearly articulate things that other people inexplicably could not, I feel strongly that the notion that autistic people write like AI writes is silly. AI writes like autistic people do.

In case you need this today: You don't need to have all the answers. You don't need to be the expert on everything.

Believe it or not, simply being a parent doesn’t give anyone the right to harass and shame their adult child over their decisions. Adults make their own choices. Their parents are allowed to disagree with them, but they are not allowed to psychologically abuse their adult children over them.

Over-functioning for someone else enables under-functioning on their part. It teaches them to rely on you rather than developing their own problem-solving and emotional regulation skills

Had the beach all to myself this morning 🌊❤️

I have never gone and will never go to a high school reunion. You couldn’t pay me enough to relive even one minute of adolescence

STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING RIGHT NOW BECAUSE THIS IS A REAL THING

My autistic, chronic-spine-and-hip-pain self is very good at tolerating the drive to New Haven, the train to Grand Central, the subway to Brooklyn, two hours in a very loud arena, and all of the chaos getting back to Grand Central. But holy hell that last MTA trip back to New Haven just murders me

Related: Being able to day-trip to Brooklyn for a New York Liberty game never gets old 🏀🗽🐘

Rhode Islanders, when we say that we’re going into “the city,” are we talking about Boston or NYC?

Saying “I don't know” isn't a sign of incompetence—it's a sign of authenticity and integrity

You might be abandoning yourself in your relationships if: * You say "yes" when you want to say "no" * You dismiss your feelings as "too sensitive" * You don't trust your own judgment * You mold your opinions to match others' * Your body is sending distress signals * You feel persistent resentment

Instead of focusing on changing the minds and hearts of people who aren't interest in changing, focus on staying grounded in your truth and maintaining your own emotional balance

You can’t reason with someone who’s not open to reason

I shall not be defeated by yet another rainy day, as I am made of pluck and vim and tenacity

Think about that time I was “quiet fired” for explaining to a CEO, clearly and kindly—during Mental Health Awareness Month, after being invited to do so—what she could personally do to better support the mental health of her employees...

Accepting what you can't control in your relationships is the first step towards reclaiming your peace and building deep connections that are truly aligned with your needs and values

I have begrudgingly fired up the boiler again. Not cool, New England. Not cool.

Them: “This boundary makes me feel like you don’t love me anymore.” You: “I’m actually setting this boundary BECAUSE I love you and I want to make sure our relationship is safe and healthy for both of us.”

I was trying to type "lightbulb" and typed "lightblub" at least 3 times, which feels like a bad omen for focus today

Ways that I can care for myself on a busy day: stay in soft pants, prioritize my meditation practice, fully inhabit every pause, keep a full glass of water on my desk, place a few grab-and-go snack options in the front of the fridge

Taking your time to respond to a request isn't “being difficult”—it's honoring a valid need for reflection