This is the kind of surreal bullshit I want to see on Bluesky, not stuff about your fucking robot vacuum cleaner you middle class twat.

Three boiled hams, a coconut and an apprentice electrician walk into a bar. Ouch.

The 5 Stage of Reform UK Councillor

Zero surprise here.

Whoever gave these taxi drivers the courage to speak their minds should be hung, drawn and quartered and their remains displayed in gibbets at crossroads to dissuade other Rupert Murdochs, Jonathan Harmsworths and Viveck Goenkas from inciting imbecility. Mike Graham’s Sunday Session post:

Three strokes and you’re out!

We have plenty of canals in Birmingham. Just saying. www.bbc.com/news/article...

Speaking of the destruction of the White House… Here’s the plan. Barron and Ivanka get married and Jared becomes their creampie cuckold. King Barron and Queen Ivanka rule over Trumperica for a thousand years due to advances in AI. @hntdove.bsky.social plot pitch. I can’t believe Penguin said no 😣.

🔻🔻🔻🔻

He sounds like Mandy Patinkin when he’s angry. Which is scary AF. Love the look on the face of the female plod as she’s seeing her ticket to the pearly gates slipping away before her eyes. Seriously though, let’s hope this image is disturbing for churchy Centrists who are on the fence about fascism.

Just in case anyone forgot…

Unpopular opinion of the week:

Dutch intelligence suspends sharing arrangements with the US after concluding that high level intel was routinely being shared by the White House with their friends in the Kremlin. www.volkskrant.nl/binnenland/n...

Bonsoir mes amis. Does anyone want to buy some necklaces and shit? Awesome bling. DM me for a price list. Vive la France!

Spotify sucks. Even God agrees.

All week the pro-Israel and pro-Trump supporters screamed at us, in unison: why aren’t you celebrating the ceasefire?? Because we knew it wouldn’t last. But even I didn’t think it’d be over in less than a week. What a complete & utter humiliation for Trump, thanks to Netanyahu.

Zionazis gonna Zionazi. #FuckIsrael

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

via Jan Brooker

The Israeli air force are also bombing Jabalia. This won't be reported on the BBC either, because we all have to pretend that Hamas broke the "ceasefire". #BBCLaurak

7 million protesters, 0 arrests. Man we suck at terrorism.

Who could forget when the pigs assassinated these two innocent dogs, with one dragging its dead mate by the lead before getting its head blasted to a thousand bone and brain fragments by your local death squad. Fuck the police and fuck you too, you unsolicited, tedious old fuckwit.

America-hating Antifa showing up for a *second* time today.

The real danger to Jews, Netanyahu and his Far Right Israeli Government.

Fascists like #AllanMassie are always gonna fash. But as we’ve seen from the Tangerine Turd in the US, we should never let them anywhere near a position of power. And that includes letting them join the pig force or pig-adjacent jobs for useless authoritarian pedos, such as being a traffic warden.

Keir Starmer and his warmongering genocidal Zionist government have to go. The Macbre Tel Aviv incident is the latest in a very long line of his “Labour Beneficiaries of Israeli Payoffs” pandering to the far right white supremacist apartheid government of so-called Israel. #FuckStarmer

My Favorite No Kings Image from today. Washington DC.

Simply Make England Go More American! 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 SMEGMA 🇮🇱 Coming at you now from a bunch of far right dicks like Niggle Fart-Rage, Dick Lice, Miserabel Ogreshit, Little Thomas Yaxative-Lemon-Cocaine-Brain, Chemotherapy Badenough, and not least Sir Kid Starver and his Labour Friends of Bombing Hospitals.

FUCK MAKE YOU ME? Just kidding. Bravo to the US for going out in their millions to tell Trump to get fucked today.

The reason gullible people believe all protesters are paid is because they can't conceive of anyone giving a shit about anyone other than themselves.

lol

#NoKings Miami!

Someone is holding a sign that says "Make Orwell Fiction Again". These people thought of everything #USDemocracy

US spy-tech giant Palantir is moving into our NHS to handle patient data, the same company with a troubling record of surveillance and deportations. Our Tech and Data Lead, Duncan, spoke at Hackney Town Hall as Homerton Hospital considers adopting Palantir software. What do you think?

2025 feels like that late-stage game of monopoly where you just go round and round paying rent and utilities forever and nobody knows what the rules are anymore and everyone’s just waiting for it all to end except the one player who cheated and has all the money

GOOD LUCK TODAY FOLKS! STAY SAFE!

‘The digital claimant’s commitment could only be stored on an iPhone running iOS 33.0.6 or later. Those who could not afford an iPhone28 were thus unable to receive the weekly jobseeker’s allowance of 3 tins of tomatoes.’ [A Short History of the British Revolution, Ian Parsley, Penguin, 2029]

So, in a new series called POSITIVE SATURDAY, I’m asking if All Cops Are Bastards. Are all cops bastards? Do you have an amusing story of a cop who wasn’t a bastard that you’d like to share? Fire away, as the cop said to the other cop! Comment below! STORIES OF COPS NOT BEING BASTARDS 👇👇👇👇👇👇👇

Police photographers are rubbish! Why do they make every Nazi incel look like a potato-faced moron? Oh, wait…

This is why they changed names to ICE.

Proposal: instead of giving ChatGPT tens of billions of dollars to fail to create artificial intelligence, give me, an Actual Intelligence, a mere $10 million and I will gladly do a spreadsheet wrong for you from time to time for a modest fee.

Fuck Kid Starver and his Zionist backers. youtube.com/watch?v=4R57...

Brainworm McSmackhead Jr. thinks The Great Replacement* is a real thing. Honestly, if I had hired him, I’d be thinking about how to replace him. Succession planning is an important part of running a good dictatorship. *a debunked white nationalist far-right conspiracy theory

Interesting, SciFiCons is warning people not to attend US conventions unless they are US citizens. Understandable considering the actions of GestapICE.