Calling for peaceful protest while your husband instigates violence against peaceful protesters has big ‘anti-bullying advocate married to the world’s biggest bully’ energy.

Current status: waiting for my Zoom hearing to start while one of the cats is strenuously objecting from the hallway.

New fear unlocked: being killed by a massive, razor-sharp spike of ice unexpectedly falling from above while I'm in front of my house 😬

Virtual school is a fine option for extended disruptions, but for a day or two, it mostly feels like checking a box. There's a foot of snow on the ground in St. Louis. Let the kids have the snow day.

We asked our kid to check what brand our ice maker was, and they told us it was Fri-gi-DAIR-ay, like it was Italian, and my wife and I are deceased. 💀

A random neighbor rolling down the sidewalk with a snowblower clearing the sidewalk for the entire block was just what my soul needed this morning. Especially in times like this, those little acts of kindness can have a huge impact. ❤️

100% chance that the same people insisting upon wearing masks while stripping people of their freedoms today cited “freedom” as the reason they refused to wear one 5 years ago

It's wild how there's basically no difference between 72 and 71 degrees or 45 and 44 degrees, but the moment you get below zero, every additional degree colder is like a personal affront that is exponentially worse somehow.

It’s wild that the right spends all this time convincing everyone that 2nd Amendment right to bear arms is so important but then uses the fact that you’re packing as a reason to kill you

Well, it's a good thing no one did anything impulsive that couldn't be undone before determining whether this ballroom could be built

About a week ago, I said, out loud, something like, "this winter has been pretty mild, we might get through this without any serious snow or ice." So anyway, I'm really, really sorry. #stlwx

With the weather coming this weekend, how's everyone's doomsday prepping coming along?

to fucken vanquish someone wearing scissor shoe

Watching clips of today's speech, I am convinced that we are vastly under-reacting to the gravity of the situation.

Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse.

THIS IS THE INTERNET CONTENT I'M HERE FOR

Zero percent chance Trump "said" this. He's probably unaware the proclamation went out and would be annoyed if he found out

Every time Trump breaks the clear letter of the law, the NYT and WaPo write a story about how he’s “pushing boundaries” or “testing the limits of his authority” He's not Chuck Yeager, guys. He's a crook.

I'm sorry, but wtf Wordle 1,675 X/6 ⬛⬛🟨⬛🟨 ⬛⬛🟨🟨⬛ ⬛🟩🟨🟩⬛ ⬛🟩⬛🟩🟩 ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ⬛🟩⬛🟩🟩

We are literally being led by Don Quixote

Damn right 🙌🏻 share.google/ylqQPQ1...

I found this medical license online and am now claiming it was my own. Let me know when you're ready to schedule your surgery.

This is just absolutely insane.

Anyone else wondering what else is happening behind the scenes while we’re all told to take "invade Greenland" seriously?

Getting emails from Chuck Schumer asking for money to help him "fight back" absolutely makes my blood boil. Lack of money isn't the problem. It's a lack of balls.

It appears we have reached the "all we have left is that marzipan shit" stage of our annual post-holiday treat consumption...

Counterpoint: no he didn't

Announcement: going forward, I will be referring to the "Trump regime" rather than the "Trump presidency" when referring to the current leadership in the US. Thank you.

There are a few things more disappointing than waking up to a cold morning and learning that that's the warmest it's going to be all day 🤦‍♂️

I have been afraid to visit my Animal Crossing island for literally years because I am not ready for the guilt trip I know I'm going to receive from my villagers for being gone so long

Just as the UK considers banning Twitter because its AI bot Grok is creating non-consenusal, sexualized deep fakes of users and failiing to comply with online safety laws, the Pentagon is integrating Grok into everything it does. Keep crushing it, USA.

Years ago, at our old house, we etched the Lost numbers into a shelf we were installing with the idea that at some point, someone would discover it and either get the joke or be totally confused. I often wonder about whether that's happened lol

Dammit Wordle 1,669 X/6 ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ⬛🟨🟨⬛⬛ ⬛⬛🟨⬛⬛ 🟨🟩⬛🟨🟨 ⬛🟩🟩🟩🟩 ⬛🟩🟩🟩🟩

I do care about House and Senate races in places other than Missouri, because I get that regaining majorities is bigger than my own congressional race. But that doesn't mean I need to get emails, calls, and texts from every single person in the country running for Congress.

If only the founders had written down their thoughts on whether or not America should be a "Christian nation" if only

My kid is doing that project at school where you have to carry an egg around for a month as if it were a baby, so I had ChatGPT create an Olan Mills-style portrait of my wife and I as the proud grandparents that we are...

JUST REMEMBERED THAT TODAY IS LOGAN'S PARTY AT TOPGOLF 🥳🎉🏌️

Hear me out: perhaps we shouldn't allow people to wager on things that are so inherently easy to rig?

Mazzy Star is the perfect rainy day soundtrack

I expected things to get bad. I did not expect things to get this bad, this quickly.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

Around this time every year, I'm torn between the fact that the Christmas decorations need to come down and the recognition that the house feels so ho-hum without them. Plus, I actually really like the amount of light the Christmas lights put out lol

I cannot fucking believe that I'm waking up and sincerely checking the news on my phone to see if we invaded Greenland, but that's life in America these days ..

Do I have any friends who live in the London area or who are otherwise familiar enough with the area to have some guidance for someone traveling there? I've been a couple of times, but it's been a while. TIA

Don't all pools pose a drowning risk? I mean, it's a big container of water... 🤷‍♂️

Is Donald Jr aware that his dad just took steps to disrupt the flow of cocaine into this country? 👀

Nobody asked for this

5% is not bad, especially for a debit card, but doesn't using a physical card totally defeat the purpose of using Venmo in the first place? Or are people changing the way they use it to make it more like a traditional bank?

Predator mode, activated