tommy đź«’
@greengreengirl.bsky.social
📤 56
📥 28
📝 1160
please don’t take me seriously, unless i say i love you…. anti-toilet, pee your pants instead
what i want to look like vs what i actually look like
about 3 hours ago
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if her eyes get more wet than her pussy, how dare you!!!!
about 15 hours ago
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the next person to mention 2016 is getting put in the chokey
about 20 hours ago
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i don’t eat all day and then wonder why i’m so tired… you need to fuel your body, bitch
about 23 hours ago
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rocky impression off, i win
1 day ago
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wish my farts were so nice people would pay for them
3 days ago
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i know that isn’t true but my feelings are telling me otherwise - a saga
3 days ago
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a man taking longer than 30 minutes to shower? he’s definitely yanking that thing
3 days ago
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I’d set bob dylan on fire
3 days ago
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COOKIE 👹
3 days ago
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this is what you want? 🍺 this is what you get 🫩 (depression)
3 days ago
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this is what you want?🍷 this is what you get 🍼 because you’re a fucking cry baby, drink your sippy
3 days ago
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call Nev up right now and tell him about The Emperor
4 days ago
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im being psychologically tortured but cant prove it (because im being psychologically tortured)
4 days ago
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man i love soduku!
4 days ago
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piss freak on Industry, alert, piss freak on Industry
5 days ago
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wasn’t blessed after i sneezed, now i’m gay
5 days ago
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my son (cat) keeps knocking my pills off the counter like ok we get it, you’re against big pharma
5 days ago
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it’s giving pussy
6 days ago
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we creamed that, real shit
8 days ago
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I MOG, U DOG
9 days ago
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started watching Industry, it’s just corporate Euphoria
9 days ago
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what illness does this burger have???
10 days ago
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my self esteem is fine, whatever…
11 days ago
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it’s NOT funny to self deprecate in therapy, you’ll just be referred to a 3-month group therapy program for self esteem
11 days ago
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my therapist hates the way i am so real and self aware so she signed me up for a self esteem group therapy program
11 days ago
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starting all my texts with “dear (name),” from now on
12 days ago
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humans deciding to start letters with “dear” is kinda so cute…
12 days ago
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looOoVe and HaaPpineSs
12 days ago
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my new vocal stim is “love and happiness” like Al green
12 days ago
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mad men, severance, peep show, succession, what’s next, come to peace with the unknown?
14 days ago
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my friend is actively reading the book i bought her for Christmas (she got a copy from the library) and i had no idea, im THAT good
14 days ago
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there being one oyster missing is symbolic
14 days ago
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you think you’re crying that hard because a boy rejected you? HA no, it’s because your mom left you when you were 8
14 days ago
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just realized… of course they can’t give their BUSTIEST woman a double chin
16 days ago
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mad men should’ve retired that god awful facial prosethic after Peggy but NO
16 days ago
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poo poo on you chilling by the fire what we eating poodoodoo
22 days ago
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don’t try anal thinking it’s going to feel like shitting because it’s not
26 days ago
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one drop of coffee and bowels start screaming
26 days ago
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most of all, i’m worried about not being able to shit when i need to shit when i have roommates again
26 days ago
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mama got a raise 👹
about 1 month ago
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when you’re Pete and someone does something for your sake
about 1 month ago
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how many blinkers does it take to kill a cart?
about 1 month ago
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if someone answers you with “sure,” that means they want you to kys :(
about 1 month ago
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don’t trust a man who tells you his favorite movie is Poor Things
about 1 month ago
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messy ass eater hiding their shame
about 1 month ago
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i know i have rsd because i asked cesar if he wanted to see my unibrow before i pluck it and he said no, and now im sad
about 1 month ago
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mama has deep, deep pain
about 1 month ago
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no one reps etnies like i do honestly
about 1 month ago
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ill stop talking about it tomorrow but vyvanse has made everyday feel like Friday
about 1 month ago
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