Blake Edwards may be my least favorite mainstream Hollywood director of all time. His movies are unfunny, unwatchable, punitive anti-entertainment.

OOOOOOH. Orinoco Flow is about Enya’s monthly menstruation.

It’s like none of the fuckers has read anything by Frank Herbert.

This is Bert(ram). He is a very skinny twink under all that fur.

Twin Fleeks: Fire Twerk With Me

“The Trump administration sued California over its strict limits on planet-warming pollution from cars, arguing that the restrictions would unlawfully force a rapid transition to electric vehicles in the state.” THE LEFT HAND FLIPPANTLY IGNORES THE RIGHT

I have a real M. Bison feeling whenever any otherwise conscious adult brings up Harry Potter.

The way you all slob Kamala’s big veiny knob long after she’s ceased to care about your technique is an exercise in pointless loyalty. Jesus Christ, use more teeth.

Let the Fed bury the Fed

I’ve become a bit of a fan of Dr. SPEKTOR, who is like Dr. Strange but with much better social skills. His Dr. Watson is an ancient vampire he cured of va purism, and much of the stories are about malevolent agencies trying to revert him.

The old man is going to kick it soon, and the gag is that he has GUARANTEED that the tricky collection of personal allegiances, debts, blackmail, and habitual obfuscation by plants in the media WILL NOT APPLY TO YOU, because he MADE SURE THAT NOBODY COULD SUCCEED HIM.

I keep seeing people trying to horseshoe on Star Wars: just because NEW Star Wars is bad DOESN'T MAKE THE PREQUELS BETTER. You are trying to make sense of the senseless.

Y’know, as much as Curtis Yarvin loves monarchy, he probably could’ve predicted that killing the Supreme Leader just appoints the Supreme Leader’s son. It’s like they’re so stupid they think monarchy results in immortality.

Don’t let this disappear.

This is like a Terry Gilliam movie but as a game show. www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGM_...

DR. I.Q. - THE MENTAL BANKER

Before becoming the God-Emperor of Mankind, he was Mr. Imperium.

"No, they're pedoMETERphiles, they have a sexual fetish for wearing pedometers while fucking." "That's somehow more disturbing than what happened."

The Sting music plays "Did you see that latest movie? The Sting?"

Every time RFK Jr. opens his damn mouth, I think of Frank Pierre Resort & Casino. www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gi_0...

I guess because WB only profited by people getting murdered by a guy in a Joker costume?

“AI is going to lead humanity into a Golden Age of advancement“

Maybe if we call it the Bisexual of Hormuz they‘ll leave it alone.

WWGGD? (What Would Green Goblin Do?)

The problem with the David Icke reptilian mythology is that we’ve learned one doesn’t need to be a literal monster to do monstrous acts. MrBeast is proof reptilians are obsolete as a concept. THINK REALISTICALLY, DAVID.

Auntie Entity needs her own prequel. She has more stuff going on than Furiosa. She also would be the only character capable of confirming Tom Hardy is Mel Gibson, or a successor.

My Queens.

McCarthyism was based in a 1949 executive order signed by Truman, which mandated that no member of a subversive organization could serve in government. It was INTENDED to prevent Nazi sympathizers, German-American Bund members and KKK guys from serving, but it was worded really loosely.

I knew a pair of twins, one named Brian, one named Byron. Brian fell off a ship. Byron started calling himself Brian, and insisted that he was free to do so because Byron is a stupid name.

I frequently consider myself heinously obese when, if I’m wearing clothing, I merely read as “tall”. Anybody who describes me says “tall” instead of “fat,” and I am a very normal and average 45 year old white guy. I hate my linebacker body. Sigh.

I would join Sea Org before I join ICE.

They’re hoping to win the war they’ve been plotting for three generations on the cheap and strictly with ideologically approved members of the military. They talk about “wanting to win,” but they’re not actually trying, they’re just pushing buttons. The exhausting cheapness of it is the problem.

Transformers were for rich kids, but particularly the ones with divorced fathers. Ironically, killing Optimus Prime and replacing him with Rodimus seemed to only bother the divorced kids. I was poor and from a nuclear family so I had Go-Bots, they had Optimus Primes and ate Lunchables.

The human mind IS incredible, and our ability to convince ourselves of the externality of our thoughts is a weird bug of our pattern recognition superpower amongst the animal kingdom. “Understanding Comics” is useful to the mystic, that an electrical outlet forms a little face is a major problem.

Psycho pigs and turbo-thwackin'.

QUARK: There's only one being I fear. WATTO: Your Grand Nagus? QUARK: No. McDuck. WATTO: *shudder*

Had Star Trek had a series in the mid-70s, this is the theme song. m.youtube.com/watch?v=Vbu4...

Man, I took some mushrooms yesterday, still kinda feeling it. My nipples started expanding outward in opposite directions, my chest became huge, and I basically became Gay Totoro for a few hours.

Constant Comment: the only teabag for reply guys

If we lose Bluesky, I’m hanging it up and going to a physical copy zine. I have First Amendment rights, and if they ban copy machines, I’ll resort to samizdat.

I have a friend named Donald who has been MISERABLE FOR AN ENTIRE DECADE just hearing his own name, and a friend named Andrew has expressed the same concern recently.

Crowley sold angels, Smith sold angels, Hubbard sold ”technology” indistinguishable from angels. Reality sold nothing, because angels aren’t for sale and never were. (Although I do believe in angels, it’s why I keep a picture of Audrey Hepburn taped to my dashboard.)

“Pwease Daddy can I have a TED talk now”

Crowley, Thelema, Abramelin shortcuts—every “angel” you worship is just your ego in a gilded mask, and anyone who believes it is already a prisoner of their own hallucination. Dee fell for it, Joey Smith isolated people with it, Hubbard tried to tie it up with self-help hokum.

Here’s a new logical razor: a thing is “real” if it has been weaponized against us by the rich. If aliens were real, they’d be zapping us with alien guns. If ghosts were real, they’d have made the ghost of Nelson Rockefeller president. If demons were real, one could buy a demon to break up strikes.

#thelema: The modern rituals, magical squares, and even the full Abramelin ordeal are all scaffolding. The absolute truth behind an HGA, if there is one, can’t be mediated. You can’t “practice” your way into it.

If the HGA is just a conflation of focused imagination and juggling your brain meat enough to make you think your fantasy is real, it still isn’t real. It’s a denial of transcendant reality. Believing in Mary Poppins doesn’t make her real even if she makes good points.

Don’t ask rhetorical questions and then turn off comments, asshole.

So it’s Panini Press Day, yet again. My blessings to you on the solemn fast.

If gas is over $6 a gallon by May (and it already is in some pretty wild places), no amount of SAVE Act will save this.