A digital girl is um a type of girl that you can put your fingers in. The more digits you put in her the more digital she is. Don't fact check me.

Splat being a such a slutty sounding word is a big win for the future of realtime 3d/4d gaussian splat porn. There are gonna be a lot of porn titles with splatting puns in the 2030s.

You don't have to be a gay twink. You can be a fat dyke.

Military recruiter trying to enlist furries to go kill random foreigners: So I heard you like foxholes!

I'm looking into possibly getting a new TENS machine (I have one that works, but it'd be nice if it didn't need AA batteries and maybe controlled differently). All the reviews though are like "this alleviated my pain" and I'm like bro that's the opposite of what I'm looking for.

Having a living room must be so slutty. If I had a living room then I'd be having so much couch sex. Instead I'm condemned to the monotony of making out with beautiful women on my bed. Such is the life of a studio apartment renter.

Every homeless person you see on the streets has been put there by force or the threat of force by the police to protect the profits of landowners and landlords and less directly to be made an example of for workers who might otherwise be less willing to accept unjust wages and working conditions.

Post-void dribbling is that thing when you go pee and then after you're done you end up dribbling a bit in your pants. It's normal for it to happen to dudes as they age (it's nbd). It'll probably start to happen sooner if you're girl hormoned though (which is also nbd).

Messed up how the manosphere tells dudes that porn and transness are intrinsically linked to western decline and the downfall of the white race or whatever. Luckily the uh womanosphere tells women that *checks notes* every woman in porn is a victim of white slavery and trans women are rapists.

I went to see a therapist a few times as a teen and the only part of the experience that stood out to me was when I made her laugh. Is that what therapy is about? Paying to be an older woman's silly little jester? If so then I understand the appeal. I yearn for it.

Saying "oh boy" is perfectly fine when things go wrong, but I think we can all agree that "oh girl" would be more appropriate when hearing good news!

Movies that would be banned from porn sites: Carrie (1976) Menstrual blood. Nine to Five (1980) Kidnapping. Bridesmaids (2011) Vomit. The Shining (1980) Alcohol. Dumb and Dumber (1994) Drinking pee. E.T. (1982) Weapons (thankfully removed in later releases, but obviously other issue remain).

The escorts in the The Godfather game are so cool. Just dancing in lingerie 24/7. Alone in a room with their gal pal. No clients. Molotov cocktails on the table.

Murder is scary bc a lot of video games are about doing murders, so if someone does murders irl then it could lead to them becoming a gamer. You're literally becoming desensitized to gaming when you do murders.

People don't realize how tightly censored porn is. I mentioned that you can't drink alcohol in porn to a girl yesterday and she seemed surprised by it.

Having like ten times more trans girl followers than cis boy followers (according to a tumblr poll) makes me feel like I'm really bad at my job (selling porn to boys), but it also makes me feel like I'm really good at my job (convincing boys to transition)!

This exotic dish can be LETHAL unless it's prepared PERFECTLY! It's called ground beef and you CANNOT eat it raw!

I love it when a girl has a distinctive face. Kinda slutty. Like why do you want me to be able to recognize you? To spot you in a crowd? So that I can make out with you?

It's so cool that's fisting is basically a form of safe sex. No risk of contracting an STI or having an unplanned pregnancy. Just good clean fun. Penis in vagina? Kinda irresponsible. Kinda risky. Edgeplay tbh. Falcon Punch your boyfriend's butthole instead.

I guess you could say that I have strong feelings about trans woman employment rates (I wanna give girls handjobs).

Imagine if I was a chicken. I bet a mouth full of breast meat wouldn't sound very appealing then. Go vegan.

Hardware shortages causing consoles to get delayed and users to hold off on upgrades is a nice start, but I'd like to see hardware shortages get so sever that people begin selling what they already have at huge markups to downgrade to even lower spec machines.

When I lost my virginity the guy I was with had to physically take my hand and place it on his dick bc I was too worried to act on my own. Too worried that (despite him being naked next to me in a motel lmao) he might not want me to touch it.

Damn girl, are you Julius Caesar? Because I wanna penetrate you and pass you around.

It's bonkers how many things that everyone does are considered shameful. Like masturbating or pooping or getting older. Or calling a girl Squidward durring sex. We all do it, right? We all moan Squidwards name once in awhile, but somehow people still look at you like you're a freak if you admit it.

He's heterosexual AND heteroromantic? She's in a cis4cis relationship with him AND it's monogamous? He's a top and she's a bottom? They're BOTH alosexual AND vanilla too? That just seems excessive.

You got any lasagna?

Cathulu's got some big tiddies. Unfathomably big tiddies.

Penis 💖

Enter The Matrix for the PS2: The cops are doing their job and responding to a mass shooting at a post office? They've aligned themselves with an unjust system of control and need to be killed. Batman Begins for the PS2: These cops are corrupt? 😱 You should do something spooky so they run away. 😈

Y'all hear about PS2 games??? They- *remembers my place in the attention economy* SUCK! YOU SHOULD SPEND ALL MONTH GOONING INSTEAD!

At some point a cave woman figured out she could carry water in a jug type object so that she wouldn't have to make so many trips back to the river and now I get to share MP4s of my jugs on the internet. We're all standing on the shoulders of women with jugs (I think that's how the saying goes).

TFW you get a sauce that you don't really like, but you don't wanna waste it by throwing it out, so you just occasionally make things taste kinda bad on purpose.

Play minesweeper on an infinite array of randomly selected porn: pr0n.stream/games.php?mo... Play sliding puzzles with an infinite array of randomly selected porn: pr0n.stream/games.php?mo... (Technically it's only 136,765 photos which is finite, but there's another 15 to 20 added per day)

Life hack: If you BECOME A TRANSGENDER WOMAN then you get to BE A TRANSGENDER WOMAN!

I'm not saying it would be a good idea, but I do think it would be really fun if two siblings transitioning in opposite directions used each other's dead names as their chosen names.

I'm watching an American show set in New York, but filmed in Toronto and there's something so funny about them just slapping a huge American flag into the background of their city street scene. Least subtle redressing approach possible.

How do people learn how to lockpick? Do pent up tgirl butches get locked in chastity so that lockpicking students can practice on their cages with the understanding that the first one to unlock their butch gets used like a glorified realdoll?

Tech YouTubers: A $600 USD ($820 CAD) laptop is a budget laptop. Me (watching on my $200 CAD ($146 USD) laptop): I'm listening and learning.

Has anyone else noticed that I'm a beautiful woman with big tiddies? What's up with that? When did that happen? Like thirteen years ago? Wtf.

Hey! You! Be a girl!

*points a video camera at you and begins shaking it (causing you to fling yourself back and forth against the walls)*

It's far from being the gayest thing about Hackers (1995) (an ostensibly heterosexual movie), but "their crime is curiosity" was a pretty gay tagline. Type of shit you'd put on the poster of a queer forbidden romance period piece.

today's lovely warmup woman wears a wristband of wagering!

Jokes and fetish fantasies aside: You're legit allowed to be a boy who takes estrogen. You're allowed to take it for any reason or no reason at all. It has no significant moral bearing or greater meaning. It's on par with deciding to have have Froot Loops for breakfast.

Someday there's gonna be a consensus about which face button on a gamepad should confirm and which one should back you out of the menu. Across all systems. Future gamers are gonna look back on us with pity and disgust.

Porn is so cool! 😍💖🌈💦🍆💕🦖

Hentai girls with dick nipples (dicks instead of nipples), but no regular dick is a bonkers combo. Like okay yeah sure I guess it would be gay if she had a dick between her legs. We dodged a bullet there, boys.

It's so cool that goth girls all have dicks! 😍

Me: I don't mean political AND trans. I mean transitioning for political reasons. In a political lesbianism type of way. The "boy" tied up in my sex dungeon: Yeah. I understand that. I just think the label would only apply if I transitioned for feminist reasons. Not if you transitioned me.