Trump said to issue pardon to Platner as early as next week.

Rumor is McConnell and Platner's campaign will be put in cryogenic storage until a cure for bad things can be found.

Breaking.... McConnell issues statement demanding proof of life from Platner's campaign...

I feel like Platner's campaign staff and McConnell's medical team are processing some of the same things right now, give them space.

Breaking... Platner vows to pull out... decision on senate race still pending.

"Shotgun!... dad you heard it... I called shotgun!?!"

I don't know why some of the Platner supporters/defenders are having such a hard time retracting their prior support and statements... it's not like they got it tattooed or something.

Google says that when a surrender collapses in a military context its called a debacle fyi.

Breaking... Platner said to be in talks with McConnell in regards to the future of his campaign...

To be fair, trump and Sanders are both waiting to hear from the Kremlin before making a public statement about the Platner accusations

Belgium wins, 5-0.

All fun and games until it's Vance/Platner 2028.

The US soccer team still has a better chance of winning the world cup than Platner has of winning his race in Maine.

10,000% tariff on Belgian waffles tomorrow.

I'm not saying it's a trend or anything, but trump did endorse the US team.

Platner has announced his terms for his dropping out of the race, one is that the straight of Hormuz will be opened immediately.

A live feed from...

Has trump endorsed Platner yet?

I see some folls are trying to "weekend at Bernie's" conspiracy mitch... there better be some first rate physical comedy sketches coming.

"A storm is coming..."

So the national mall... it's the 250th anniversary of the declration of Independence.... a storm is coming... the Q kids are probably going nuts right now.

Someone has already done the photoshop with a giant dildo with wings... right?

So what dastardly plot will Kash announce that he foiled for this weekend?

The third rail of modern American politics... not accepting failed ideologies of political extremists.

The majority of Americans are not going to participate in the democratic process if the choices get whittled down to facisist vs communist, but then again maybe that is the point.

So who's going to write the first piece about how we need to stop calling it a defear/surrender if we want him to stop bombing them?

Watch this, and who reacts and how, it will be very telling.

"Et tu, pool boy?"

"It was antifa, on the mall, with a knife..." Worst game of clue ever.

The post 2026 rewrite of this classic has Forrist cut off while talking about his service in the war with Iran, and then he and Jenny both tragicly dying from complications of the chemical burns they recieve from the reflecting pool in a shriners hospital.

Richard Dreyfuss's character did this bit back in 1977 and everyone thought he was nuts, now it gets you super dad status.

Attention sports fans, we have a contender for best Frisbee golf shot of the year.

Maybe its just me, but I feel that the guy that is currently in the process of surrendering to the Iranians shouldn't also be threatening to bomb the hell out of them.

Did Susan Collins write this strongly worded MOU?

Bleachbit 2026... "but the reflecting pool!?!?!"

The wild and unhinged investigation into who spiked the pool to make das fuhrer look bad, is going to make the "Jewish space lazers" seem like little blip in the fabric of time.

"It was the greatest surrender ever!!!"

Will the surrender hold, inquiring minds want to know.

Non zero chance that there are some neo-nazis in the crowd tonight that are asking themselves if its possible that the blood shed on the mat tonight is seeping into the white house grounds.... and wondering if its time to start chanting "blood and soil'"

250 years was a good attempt... that's the best review I can give at this point, 3 stars and I'm being generous.. *genuine.

So the "gladiators" are doing tunnle walks through the peoples house.... we are so mich closer to collapse than folks realize.

Cease cease-fire.

Great, now the nazis control the far right and the far left.

So the trump endorsement curse is a thing...

Loud boos but as a lullaby... this may be ground breaking research into ASMR related infant soothing techniques, just sayin.

So this really nice redneck guy implied he would hurt someone if he saw them burning an American flag, as a combat veteran I'm prepared to introduce him to my "shit you don't like is not illegal and is covered by freedom of speech" teaching aids.

Mike makes a bid to be first for the gallows next Jan 6.

Many years ago when I was stationed here mid GWOT, it was so safe it was used as a R&R location for forward deployed troops to unwind, the biggest issue we had was getting the height of our socks measured in PT gear by leadership to make sure we were still in regs, damn times have changed.

Update, the concert on the national mall will now solely consist of Kid Rock, a semi trailer of natty light and two roge AH-64 Apache crews outside of their training area violating restricted airspace.