Nobody is ready for the book report explaining how “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie” is anti-socialist propaganda

… I’m stealing this for D&D. Dragons taking a page from Mind Flayers after the Elder Brain Dragon incident and using magic to create a small dragon that gets inserted into an ear, eye, or nose to turn a victim into a thrall for the dragons.

Post your favorite Lord of the Rings character. Wrong answers only.

Btw, if you play Lego D&D, these may have good pieces for your Druids. Just saying: represent your character wildshaped into a lion by having a minifig in a lion suit, just so we can tell what’s a player and what’s an NPC

Played more than I meant to off-stream. Found the "Mermaid" hairstyle, aka, Misty's haircut. This game is better than it has any right to be.

Hey, thanks for watching. Imma try to stream all day tomorrow, because I'm ashamed to admit Pokopia is winning me over with its charm. And thanks for joining me on the raid to @goofballdoggottv.bsky.social

Now that stress should be done for the week, let's freaking play some Ditto whatever www.twitch.tv/muttonthedra...

Pokémon tattoo idea: Just put Ditto’s dumb face on your body. I’m serious. Make it look like it made a decent transformation into you, but it got the location of the face wrong.

Just saying: if you want inspiration for foods for your D&D campaign, check out Tasting History. All kinds of recipes are there, from Ancient Egyptian recipes, Feudal Japan recipes, Viking-Era Nordic recipes, and of course Medieval European Tavern food like this. youtube.com/shorts/jq-D_...

I want to see the Pokémon that does this. A route 1 caterpillar, your basic Caterpie, Wurmple, Blipbug, whatever. But it only evolves after KOing 20 bug types with it, then leveling up. Bug/steel with a unique ability that makes all weaknesses bug-type has hit for neutral damage.

It’s hard and I’m not 100% set on them all (the website made it hard to find specific releases, like the OG 2011 Minecraft, but this is my 9 games for now. Yes, I know BG3 should be here, but I haven’t beaten the game, so I’m not counting it my9games.com

Dumb predictions by the usually wrong dragon: We’re gonna get a small Pokopia-based TCG set. It won’t be a big one, it will be somewhere between the Detective Pikachu & Pokémon Go TCG series, but it will feature the special forms of Pokémon, like our Ditto or Professor Tangrowth.

Did you know that in terms of any human/Pokémon - Pokémon relations, Ditto is compatible with everyone because it's everyone's friend? At least that's what this pro-Ditto propaganda says. Let's find out if it's right. www.twitch.tv/muttonthedra...

You know what? On stream, I talk a lot about random hills I’m willing to die on that have no real consequence, but it’s just a strong opinion on an, ultimately, unimportant thing. But I wanna hear yours. What random, inconsequential hill are you willing to die on?

Switch 2 is hooked up in my streaming room again. I’ll figure out getting my living room setup working properly again during lunch, but I’m all set to stream Pokopia after work.

How I arrived on Bluesky:

I think we had a pretty good stream! We got to Mankar Camoran's paradise, and now? Now we're ready to beat the main story of Oblivion next time we play it! But next stream will probably be Pokopia >.> Thanks for joining the raid on @sharptheredmawile.bsky.social

I didn't even realize it was my affiliate anniversary! Well, come say hi as I try to avoid ruminating about crap at work and lose myself in Oblivion www.twitch.tv/muttonthedra...

Fun fact: despite sharing the same middle name as a good chunk of the main cast (the), I am not from the Sonic series.

Dragon advice: to keep your kobolds from unionizing, send them through an X-Ray machine for the high-energy radiation every 2 weeks. This will keep your kobolds ionized and away from any attempts to unionize them.

I need to scream into the void, so Bsky seems like a good enough place to do it. The thing that annoys me, personally, about these Christo-Nationalists is how much I read the Bible. Between actual private school classes & Mormon Sunday School/Seminary, I must have read the Bible at least 6 times.

When setting up a lair, a dragon should consider if their minions may misuse a tentacle pit. Remember: a tentacle pit in use for pleasure can’t trap any thieving adventurers!

Skyrim Theory: The Graybeards frequently use the Clear Skies shout at the Throat of the World because they're trying to restore balance from the magic the Thalmor have been using to make the weather uncooperative between the border of Cyrodiil and Skyrim.

It has been a rough last few minutes at work, but let's play Oblivion www.twitch.tv/muttonthedra...

Better to be open about being a perv than to try and hide behind a facade of respectability. Or the facade of being a cute little 0w0 bean.

Hot take: I don’t need my fast food workers to say “please” or “thank you.” I need them to just take the food orders, take the money, and give the food as ordered. If AI HAS to be used, use it to make sure people are getting the food they ordered, dammit.

it's all just art. "porn" is just art that makes you horny, in precisely the way that "horror" is art that makes you scared and "metroidvania" is art that makes you write video essays

Thanks for watching! We got through the Knights of the Nine, and as soon as we blast through the rest of the main story, we'll finally get to the good part of Oblivion: the Shivering Isles! In the meantime, thanks for joining the raid on @sharptheredmawile.bsky.social with Wolfenstein!

I'm just gonna mash through dialogue to finish Knights of the Nine quick. It's just not my favorite questline in Oblivion, even if the gear is neat. www.twitch.tv/muttonthedra...

New phone case after my old one started to fall apart! Now taking bets as to when gunk somehow gets inside the case after using compressed air and a microfiber cloth.

What emoji do I use if I want to convey this?

A lady in a computer with a pretty voice told me I could have cake. She lied :c

Trying to stave off a manic episode. So if any of y'all decide to start advertising stream bots or ai-generated emotes, Imma grab the hammer. Do I mean the ban hammer or Maxwell's Silver Hammer a la The Beatles? FAFO www.twitch.tv/muttonthedra...

Hear me out: A group of furries traveling around the country in a hippie van with a barking human with a phat ass to solve mysteries. I call it: Gyatty Matt, Where You At? And when ratings go down, Gyatty Matt’s nephew, Splatty Matt gets introduced to die every episode!

Ok, so, like, did the discussion about Slappy from Goosebumps always trying to make young girls his slaves, and thus making the horror of an innocuous person/thing preying on young girls be digestible for children already happen, or are we not opening that can of worms?

I should actually look into seeing how hard it would be to pose my VTuber model in various situations for social media pics. Like, if my model was made in Blender and I can import it into an existing scene, like a house, how hard would it be to pose it stealing from your cookie jar?

Stream will happen, but there’s some stuff at work I want to do before the weekend. Will post link when I’m going live

My take on FireRed & LeafGreen ports coming. Why must the Pokémon Company make it so hard for me to love Pokémon again?

I know nothing about K-Pop, I just had an idea to make a cursed D&D item called "Scroll of VVish," since it might make players think it's actually a "Scroll of Wish," but all it does is summon the K-Pop band "VVISH." Any K-Pop stans wanna tell me what they should do when summoned?

Doing a bit of a comfort game rn. Come or not, idk www.twitch.tv/muttonthedra...

Bro, why is my Amazon package out for delivery? It’s just a kink item I was expecting tomorrow anyway, let your driver not go through the freaking snowstorm!

Gonna stream in about 1.5 hours. Power hasn’t been a problem so far, but I am in a snowstorm right now, so if stream suddenly cuts out, you know why

Asking others who might know better here: For the sake of budgeting, I wanted to stretch the ground beef in Spaghetti Bolognese (where browned, broken up ground beef is just hanging out in the sauce), what would you recommend? I thought about breadcrumbs, but the texture might be ruined in sauce

While it’s tempting to abuse your kobolds, dragons are advised to be stern, but patient with their kobolds. Lest they take inspiration from the summer camp play in Addams’ Family Values.

69 has been a meme forever. 66 has been a meme since Star Wars prequel memes became popular online. 67 became a meme just last year. If I can find how to make 68 funny, I’ll have massive Internet points…

In the club, straight up "dinking it". and by "it", haha, well. let's justr say. My oiter

Happy Mardis Gras. Now give me ur beads

Crow: caw* *translation: MAJOR BUMMSVILLE!

The villain curses the hero with reincarnation. Not to give the hero as many tries as they need to save the land. But to savor the hero failing every time, breaking not just their spirit, but their very soul into accepting non-existence over any kind of afterlife.

Dragon: what happened to all the milk? A line of kobolds, each with a milk mustache: 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️🤷