Feel what you feel. Validate it, explore it, express it (in safe contexts), understand it. Honor it. Then: breathe; blink; focus; & remind yourself you're not under any obligation to let the intensity of a feeling "make" you do things that'll short circuit your recovery arc.

There's nothing wrong w/ the person you are. You don't "need" to ditch your personality to recover from trauma. And also, you GET to change, to retool yourself .01% at a time from the ground up if you choose, if it's more consistent w/ the life you want. Point is: it's YOUR call.

The fact that the people who share your name & DNA or who happened to attend the same church you did growing up don't understand who you are, what's important to you, or what you need, can be painful. And, it has exactly zero to do w/ your worth, value-- or future.

Remind yourself today that you don't have to be prefect to be worthy. You don't have to be perfect to deserve to live. You don't have to be perfect to deserve safety, or love, or happiness-- or to deserve more than the bare minimum in life. You deserve it all. Here, now.

‘Tulip’ comes from the Turkish word ‘tülbent’ which means "turban." The flower got its name from the resemblance of its overlapping petals to the folds of fabric in a turban.

Random spin time…📷🦋

Well, yesterday I fully ended the long-distance relationship. He’s too entangled with his abusive gf, and clearly not ready to face reality or get safe. I told him friendship is good, but I can’t be someone else because of her crazy shit. It’s a shame. He’s pretty amazing. 🥺

Still my favorite. XVI is a close second.

The vast majority of trauma survivors I've ever met don't want anything "special." They want the opportunity to find out who they are without the ghosts of their past polluting their thoughts, beliefs, & decisions-- autonomy that the normies take for granted. No more; no less.

Looks like my kids and I will be dusting off our old islands. 😂

Day 27 Quick lil Doodle for #DressupTober / #Dressuptober2025 / OC Usami Almost done with the daily doodle challenge! ^^

Random…photo…spin… 📷🦋

Just now. Chicago.

Macro lens shot of “The Alnwick Rose” for #RoseWednesday 🩷 I love getting an Autumn flourish from our English roses. #Photography99 📷 #EnglishRoses 🌱

Macro lens shot of ‘Teasing Georgia’ English climbing rose for #RoseWednesday Creamy golden goodness💛 #Photography99 📷 #EnglishRoses 🌱

It’s Thursday somewhere which means it’s time for #InsectThursday Macro lens photo of a Fiery Skipper butterfly on a pink Zinnia 💛🩷 #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋

Bridge photo between #RoseWednesday & #InsectThursday Macro lens photo of a Grass Skipper butterfly on the ‘Queen of Sweden’ English rose.💛🩷 #Photography99 📷 #Butterflies 🦋 #EnglishRoses 🌱

Sleep is eluding me at the moment. Again. I am so over this.

One of my favorite Ae'o shots (in fact, I have a 24" x 18" float mount of it up on my living room wall), a matched pair feeding in the shallows of Kealia Pond NWR. Inspired to post by @mollybangles.bsky.social and her curlews! :) 📷🦉🌿

Too tired to catch up. Going to get some sleep. Good night everyone!

Day 16 Quick lil Doodle for #DressupTober / #Dressuptober2025 Here’s my OC Lee again but with her hair up this time for this outfit, she looks cute with horns x3

Exhausted. Hopefully sleep is good tonight.

For many abuse survivors, our pets are more than a source of emotional support. They might be the one reliable source of unconditionally safe & affectionate physical touch we've experienced--maybe our entire life.

Guess what’s back! Yup. Insomnia. 😫 I hate this. 🥺

Highly recommend joining in if you feel like you can make 11 ornaments! My sister joined in last year & made mini wreaths with collected wild grape vines & dried flowers; & I've done felt creations twice. here's my previous years contributions.

I finally had the talk with him, and it went really well. He was receptive and interested in resources I sent him. He thanked me for sharing my perspective, and admitted that he might be in denial. He said I’m a good one to have on his side. I said I’ll be there as long as he’ll let me. 🥰

Still no talk. I’m frustrated. Hoping to the opportunity tomorrow or Thursday.

Well, I did not get to talk with him today. His youngest is sick, and he’s of course focused on her. Timing, I think, is crucial. I’m hoping to get this chat done this week.

Mars was the Roman god of war. That’s why we say ‘martial arts,' ‘martial law,' and 'court martial.' Marshall was the Roman god of designer fashion at discount prices. That’s why we have Marshall’s.

Another view of the beautiful Red-spotted Purple butterfly on a wild Honeysuckle shrub. #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋

While Swallowtail season is winding down, there are still a few beauties visiting. Lovely Pipevine Swallowtail for #ColorfulMonday 🖤🤍💙🧡 #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋

Today’s random photo spin… 📷🌱🦋

I have a plan to speak with my friend tomorrow. I’m aiming for supportive but also frankness. I’m hoping he’s receptive, because if he’s not, I could lose someone very important to me. (Yes, this is the long distance guy.) It’s worth the risk if he’ll get him thinking. I just want him safe.

I can't believe I have a take on whether or not you should slur AIs. I'm landing very hard on not. Using slurs for it is treating it like a person which we should not be doing AND ALSO why are all these things so racially tinged, when btw the backend workers in Kenya might have to read this.

Anyone have advice on how to talk to someone in an abusive relationship? I’ve talked to him about it before, and he was receptive. But she is escalating, and I am seriously worried about his safety. I’d appreciate any advice.

Good night, Bluesky. I’ve slept really well the last few nights. Here’s hoping the trend continues! I hope you all sleep well, too! Well, for those of you going to sleep soon!

My long distance man. My precious, sweet long distance man. He’s stuck in a horrible abusive situation. It’s the main reason we can’t really start to explore anything. He feels very stuck. It’s so heartbreaking to see such an amazing person go through this. 🥺

Yesterday my daughter got news that she’s not only accepted to the college of her choice, but she also is being awarded a significant scholarship. We’re all very excited for her. 😁

Still crazy exhausted. I slept really well last night. Here’s hoping tonight is the same. 🥱

So tired. So very very tired. I am stressing myself out over this long distance man. It’s all me. He has done NOTHING wrong. But I, in my brokenness from past experience, keep projecting shit onto him. Good thing he’s a good man. I just pray we can make this work, because I know he’s worth it.

I’m not feeling sick yet, so maybe I didn’t catch something from the girl who coughed on me yesterday. Here’s hoping! I barely got to talk to my man today, sadly, because work was crazy. But it’s ok. That happens sometimes. Hopefully tomorrow.

Thrilled to share this beautiful Viceroy butterfly for #InsectThursday. I find that the Viceroy’s appearance is a bellwether that the Monarchs are coming.🧡🖤🤍 #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋

And an absolutely stunning female Eastern Tiger Swallowtail today for #InsectThursday. She is enormous, with an estimated wingspan of at least 5.5 inches. She is making a clear statement that #SwallowtailSeason is still kicking. #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋

Exhausted. Can’t believe it’s only Wednesday. Work has been crazy busy. But it’s good. Also, lots of chatting with my long distance…man. 🥰 Best part of the week so far. Two more days until the weekend. I can do this! Here’s hoping I stay healthy - a student coughed directly in my face today. 😫

Good evening from the male Monarch🧡 #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋 #MonarchSeason

Numbers 1 and 2 in the Judge List are the biggies. Don't much care about the Number 3. (But, full disclosure, I place the paper over the roll.)

I’m so exhausted it isn’t funny. So as much as I want to catch up, I cannot. Hopefully tomorrow.

A beautiful Pipevine Swallowtail for #ColorfulMonday 🖤🤍💙🧡 #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋

Look ‘em in the eyes… ❤️ Male Spicebush Swallowtail for #ColorfulMonday #Photography99 📷🌱 #Butterflies 🦋