About a week ago I'm like "Hey, a mohawk would be cool." Little did I realize I'd be trimming the sides of my head with an electric razor every couple of days. I'd say "at least I'm using less shampoo," but I'm lazy and I use 3-in-1 anyway.

So I go into the back of the hobby shop. Some random guy asks, "Hey, you wanna play Commander?" And I say "Buddy, I don't wanna play Magic even *with* underwear on."

Sir Not-Appearing-in-This-Film

D&D switching to a monthly subscription "game as a service" is great news for every single game that isn't D&D. And that means it's great news for tabletop gaming in general. Please keep punching yourself inthe dick, Hasbro. It amuses me greatly.

Make a movie into porn: Johnny Erotic

Johnny Mnemonic. "But Brian, that's a dolphin." He says it himself in the movie: "It's a fish."

Cyberpunk RED has an in-universe MMORPG called "Elflines Online," that your characters can play. This allows for sort of "double bleed" situation: Your player might get way too into playing their Cyberpunk character, who gets way too into playing their Eflines character. It's a bleed matryoshka.

That was two days ago, Frog. But thanks, I guess.

Who would go blocking the Antiques Roadshow account?

Support for public libraries is the hill I will die on. They provide so much more than just books or internet access. I will always get on my soapbox when it comes to libraries, because they're worth defending.

No one knows what it's like to be the bad man to be the scat man Be da ba da ba be bop bop bodda bope

Look. I really like the Richard Pryor / Gene Wilder movie "Silver Streak." I think it's (mostly) great. And then there's the scene where they disguise Gene Wilder by putting shoe polish on his face, and... I... Oh, no. Not good.

Magnolia. I'm still convinced Paul Thomas Anderson set out to make the ultimate "sad people doing sad things" film, but a producer asked "Where's the ending?" So he pulled that ending out of his ass and threw in some lazy foreshadowing. It wasn't written for people. It was written for the Academy.

There's one way to combat all of this: Make some weird shit. You know that project you've been thinking about forever? Start making it. Doesn't matter if all you have is a phone, a spiral notebook, colored pencils, or whatever. It doesn't even have to be good. Make some shit that AI cannot make.

When you have several buckos and you forget which pocket the correct one is in.

"What is my favorite scary mov-- Look, son. If you aim to slaughter me, then please just come here and get it over with already. I sell propane and propane accessories. Do you think I want to keep living?"

I love naming my video game characters "Dude," so everyone sounds like Bill & Ted characters.

Surprise! Like who doesn't have an Interocitor, you collective heads of knuckle?

At what point did this site decide all images should be converted to webp?

I messed up and wound up watching the Unmanned DeLorean.

I'm getting better at keyboard lately. I still can barely read music. But I've been writing goofy riffs for the stuff I'm working on, and it's shaking out nicely.

Stacy's mom Put Jared Leto in Tron

It's my birthday. You know what you can do for me? Do something nice for someone else today. Suggestions: ✊Help someone who's asking for it. 💬Leave a nice comment on someone's art. 💵Donate to a cause you believe in, if you can. ↩️Reskeet someone's dumb joke. 🎲GMs: Fudge a roll to help out a player.

I just beat the first half of Mortal Kombat 1 story mode. None of you told me it had a goofy rap song at the end. I live for this kind of cheese.

We should have fought hard against the corporate takeover of the Internet, and just kept making "Ate My Balls" pages on Geocities.

Moonshine isn't coming out as strong as you like? Still issue.

I work in the news biz. Imagine the look on some hiring manager's face when they see J Jonah Jameson wrote "Hey, I actually like this guy."

Seeing @botfuture.bsky.social at SchwonkSoundStead, along with Afterbirth Cartoons and Paradise Day. Don't act like I don't have a lot going on.

Decided it was mohawk time. Deal with it.

"Oh, but where's Michael? Why isn't Michael in Halloween III?" Shut up. You wanna know where Myers is? He took one look at Tom Atkins' mustache and realized there was no way he was gonna win against that. So he stayed in Smith's grove on Halloween, like the coward he is. This flick rules.

Sitting down, trying to think of a post that'll piss off everyone in the #TTRPG community at once. Light bulb goes off over my head. "You probably already own enough dice, and you don't need to buy any more."

"For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me, it was Tuesday."

A wine flight, but it's just different flavors of Faygo.

Night of the Demons

"I can hold my breath for a long time, Hank!"

"Get out of my day, Dad. I'm buying that Gathering of the Juggalos ticket." "Dang it, Bobby. Can't you just go to a local folk festival?" "If you don't gather, you don't matter, Dad!"

This is a point I try to hammer on. Even if you do some totally oddball stuff, as long as you have a passion for it, it'll shine through in the finished work. Trying to make a TTRPG combining your love for vintage synths and grapefruit soda? Freakin' do it. You'll find your people.

Marble race videos are so stressful. I'll start watching one like "Come on, green." And then green won't be able to get its shit together, while red and blue are just owning that obstacle course.

"Bill! We're broke, I'm not even sure what drugs I'm on, we're covered in mud and sweat, and we're half-buried alive in some chicken wire fence!" "I know, Dale. Best Burning Man ever."

Mojo Nixon - High School is a Prison

"And there go my nipples again."

"I know you're here, Dracula, you big fucking nerd. Where's my money?"

Warner Bros. executives in 1989, every time Michael Keaton wouldn't stop yelling "I'm Batman."

My favorite pro-AI argument is like "Imagine an Avengers movie, but it stars Bruce Lee, Humphrey Bogart, Marilyn Monroe, and you." That's it? That's all you've got? Nothing original at all? Just redoing what's already been done, but with some dead actors and an uncanny valley version of myself?

Somebody talk my about-to-be-47-year-old ass into or out of buying a longboard. Because I'm already walking around like "Mid-40s skateboarder! I know I will get hurt!"

Someone on Discord asked if I was going to crowdfund my next solo TTRPG. No. I like the current model: I make a game with little-to-no overhead. Nobody pays until a product actually exists. Lulu, Itch, or DTRPG handle fulfillment, so I can focus solely on design.