Graham: Mr. President, you're not far behind God, but we're going to start with him.

The House narrowly passed a nearly $70 billion, three-year funding package for immigration enforcement, allocating $38 billion to ICE, $26 billion to the Border Patrol and $5 billion for contingencies, in a 214-212 vote.

I wonder if Trump will also fall asleep during his birthday UFC fight. The prediction markets need to get on my level.

Raise your hand if you think there is more fraud in the history of Medicaid, Medicare, and Social Security than in one tax season of the Fortune 100.

Erika Kirk is a degenerate. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

(Regarding the California primary) Reporter: But what evidence is there to prove that there was a— Johnson: I don't— some of these efforts are so diabolical and so far upstream, it is impossible to prove. But I think everybody knows instinctively something is wrong here.

‘BuT wOMeN aRe tOo EmOTiOnaL tO lEaD, lmao. All y’all fuck so far off into your fantasy land and don’t come back.

Trump: Your elections in this country, we're like a third world country. Your elections are crooked. And you're crooked. And Meet the Press is crooked. And so is ABC and CBS and CNN.

US defence secretary Pete Hegseth used a D-day anniversary speech in Normandy to link European immigration to an invasion. His remarks prompted condemnation from historians and rights advocates who said the remarks desecrated the memory of the fallen.

Dipshit

When you right, you right.

Anddd the rich get richer

Spotted in Wisconsin 👀

The new $250 bill revealed!

Trump fell asleep during his 3pm meeting today (again)

Ivanka Trump on Building a $1.5 Billion Resort on Albania’s Sazan Island

Ramaswamy: Actually a black baby is probably safer in the inner street of Chicago, in the inner city of Chicago, than in the womb of his own Black mother.

Trump: You know, this transgender, this guy running in Texas, he says there are 6 genders. He wears a mask all the time. You know, he's a disaster candidate, I'll tell you.

Bessent: We did not have regime change, but we changed the regime. As President Trump said at the cabinet meeting, as we've said other times, the first layer of leadership was eliminated, the second layer, and we're now at the third layer.

Bessent: I am sure that Mr. Alito follows all legal and ethical guidelines, and I can assure you that at Treasury, we follow all the legal and ethical guidelines.

Miller: When Tallarico goes in for a blood test, when he gets a physical, blood doesn't come out. Instead, soy milk comes out.

Sanders: Can you believe that in the richest country in the world, where the people on top have never had it so good, we rank 35th out of 36 major countries in terms of childhood poverty?

Vance: And that man lived his final moments on this earth neglected while a fraudster got rich by providing services that he never actually provided. 🤔

MAGA is a cult.

Newsom: Anyone from California that receives any of those funds, we want to tax 100% of those proceeds.

Trump: They thought they were going to outwait me, you know, we'll outwait him. He's got the midterms. I don't care about the midterms. Look what happened last night. That was the prelude to the midterms.

😂

Now the ballroom is going to have a ‘Drone Port’, pretty sure they're building the Death Star.

Is that why they call it the radical left?

The Epstein suicide note. What do you guys think?

… The word of the Bern. Amen.

I just want everyone to know I hated Joe Rogan before it was cool. Thank you for your attention to this matter. LRR.

Is this a serious headline because omfg.

Meirl

😂 wild

Pam Bondi will now appear before Oversight on May 29th (that's my birthday btw!!) to answer questions about the DOJ’s handling of the Epstein investigation and files. This was announced after the Dems filed a civil contempt resolution against Bondi for failing to appear for deposition on April 14.

Check out my latest Substack post

Truth. Who agrees?

The price of gas, April 8, Allentown, PA.