Wait I have more because everyone is giving live laugh love still advice, and you need to actually know shit. 401(k) is a savings account set up by your employer. Matching means your employer will contribute money to your savings account up to a certain %. 3% is an employer-standard match, so take

1. Identify the most expensive quarter of your year. For me, it’s October-December. I love all the holidays and become capitalism’s bitch for three months. Knowing that helps me to “budget” the rest of the year so I can do all the big spending (incl travel) during the months that matter most to me.

Was rent due on the jet????

Idk how else to explain it, but this album was written for Travis Kelce and I hate that for her but mostly I hate that for me because I hate this album

I don’t kink shame until I do :/

I hadn’t eaten today because I had back to back meetings, and right when I got to the point of hangry (3pm), I scrolled through UK’s eel and pie TikTok during a quick break, and I swear to god, it’s like my stomach didn’t exist for another 5 hours.

Let Emma Watson serve as an example that radical empathy is not the morally superior absolution it is framed to be. You cannot empathize with hate. You are allowed to have complicated feelings when reconciling who you thought someone was vs who they really are, but it is a choice to love them anyway

Ended up At a bar with a divorcee and maybe it’s the cocktails but we are soul sisters now her name is Brittany or Brittney idk I did not ask but she’s alright

Reading vibes at the quiet, near-empty wine bar absolutely murdered when they plugged in the speaker and started playing modern country music. 😭

It’s a Holocene-ass kind of day.

Reminiscing on when ppl on fandom twt would get mad at nsfw posted without tags because they didn’t want to get caught looking at porn at work and I was just like…….girl pls go do ur job and get off twt omg

Me to me trying to learn photoshop to make work ID badges

Trying to teach myself PHOTOSHOP for work and I feel like a DUMMY

A $30 breakfast burrito like what are we doing here

Feels incredibly important to remind everyone that autism is a spectrum that has in recent years become social media’s MPDG of affable disorders. But, like with any broad classification, we often forget the side of it that is not easily digestible and made cute for television.

One thing about me is that I’m going to be on time even when my friends are predictably consistently late

Making my coworker change the air filters in my car and check my tires 😃😃😃

Clinically, what is wrong with my coworker who reheats his tuna casserole in the communal microwave?

I have a very long workday, so I called for reinforcements from my favorite local Indian restaurant, and they gave me double rice on the house I love them so much this bag was so heavy 😭

I rarely read fic these days because I have a TBR bookCASE, not just a shelf or two, so when I do dedicate reading time to a fic, and I go to leave a comment as is good and proper in fandom, and I find a little fuckface commented some bitch ass backhanded slight, know that I will eviscerate them.

Have reached the age where a 9PM bedtime makes me giddy.

Girl dinner ✨

Doing my life’s work by introducing every 20-something burgeoning slut to The Kills’ “Baby Says.”

Close enough welcome back Scott and Tessa

Someone in the publishing industry pls buy my series about a necromancer perpetually annoyed that she’s caught in the holy war between heaven and hell over souls—and in fact, if they keep pissing her off, then she’ll start raising the dead and fucking them for sport. I will make you lots of money.

If you have been the victim of a chronic complainer and all-around miserable person whose life is nothing but a series of everything bad only happens to them all the time, then you might qualify for one (1) primordial scream into the abyss.

Do you want a beta reader or do you want a fan girl?

Hate whatever this design choice is

What started as a quick sketch reminder that I kept on my fridge for years is now permanently with me.

Romanticize 💕 your life ✨

Getting a tattoo in MY handwriting? Truly iconic of me.

I once had a British boss who refused to turn on the AC in the tin box of an office and instead told me to drink a cop of tea to raise my body temp so it wouldn’t feel as hot and with sweat-drenched tits chaffing in my bra I gave probably one of the meanest looks of my life and said go fuck yourself

Mind you, this was at 7am.

From the depths of my soul I can reassure you that your 30s really are more beautiful than you could ever imagine.

I go into a fugue state when I shop at Whole Foods because why the fuck did I spend $42 in the salad bar for a cucumber couscous salad and grapes.

Mama just booked her next tattooooooo

I feel like I have touched the face of god www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlP9...

Whenever I see bullshit tipping discourse, I just go harder. The Target employee loading my drive up order? $10. The bartender pouring my wine while I wait for a reservation next door? 40%. The public disdain we have for the service industry is the height of hypocrisy—and fucking embarrassing.

Personally I really enjoy the hypomania of getting rid of half my apartment and buying all new things. Like yes I could organize my kitchen cabinets on a lazy Sunday morning but I could also sweep everything into a box at 2am and have new dishes ordered by 3am, and no amount of Lexapro can stop me.

I need someone with ACOMAF on kindle to do a search for “no doubt” and tell me how many times that phrase appears in the book. I’m willing to bet it’s at least a dozen, which isn’t a lot, but it’s still too much for one novel.

I need an ACOTAR fic where Feyre was sent to the Night Court’s Prison long before Rhys became High Lord, and when he learns about her, he can’t help but visit her until the bond snaps into place and he REALIZES HE HAS TO BREAK HER OUT OF THE PRISON THAT IS LAW UNTO ITSELF I NEED THIS FIC NOW

On my 20th or so watch of this on loop, I had been crying laughing so much that I threw up a little in my mouth

Why THE FUCK is there so much furry content on my feed it’s the only kink I shame without remorse

The bad faith dark romance discourse always makes me want to unleash my privated AO3 and double down on the moral imperative that these readers deserve agency to enjoy this genre without owing explanation to tiktok psychologists and armchair lit critics.

AI is embarrassing but if AI existed in 2001, Cassanda Clare would not have been banned from ffnet, and that singular thought has had me cackling all afternoon.

The 20 minutes staring into the abyss in the Trader Joe’s parking lot is unbeatable.

“Do you want to go to Cheesecake Factory tonight?” is a guaranteed yes to a hookup with me

Calling it now: my song of the year.

No rpf but

Sometimes I’ll randomly remember that SJM made Feyre illiterate for literally no reason lmao